3rd grade bullying/exclusion among girls - ProTeacher Community





Garson Garson is offline
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3rd grade bullying/exclusion among girls
Old 02-08-2011, 02:46 AM
 
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I'm having quite a time with the girls (11) in my 3rd grade class of 15. (I know, I'm lucky with those numbers). There's a lot of meanness going on, despite my efforts to sing and talk about respect, responsibility, and role-modeling. This is going on during recess and lunch. I know that there's one group who are considered "the in crowd", one girl who's a secretive bully (I call her on it whenever I observe it), and a girl who's relatively new to the class, who is a manipulator ( I call her on that when I see it). The tears that flow when one experiences being left out, could fill a river! I read "The Hundred Dresses" in the beginning of the year, and I have class meetings about how we can improve the climate in the classroom. I'd love some ideas.


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Old 02-08-2011, 04:20 AM
 
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Did you see the CBS news last night? They did a story called from Bullying to Best Friends. They talked a little about how the school and parents handled it. This one boy was bullied by everyone. CBS said they would have it on their website if teachers wanted a resource. You might check it out. Do you have a counselor in your building that could possibly help you with the situation?
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Old 02-08-2011, 04:07 PM
 
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I also have a small class---10 girls and 3 boys (had 4 boys but 1 moved). I am lucky because I don't seem to have any bullying issues in my classroom. For the most part, they are kind to each other. But I do see girls who always want to pair up with certain girls (which I suppose is natural).

I have purposefully split up friends (I hate to do that) to give them some diversity at their tables.

I also try to place them with partners that *I* pick when we do partner things. This way they are getting to know other people in the class other than just that BFF!

The poor boys in my class don't stand a chance against all those girls!
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Old 02-08-2011, 04:19 PM
 
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There's a book called Queen Bees and Wannabes that explains the roles of girls. The book was written for parents but it might give you some ideas, too.
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video
Old 02-08-2011, 05:55 PM
 
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There's a video that specifically targets girl bullies. It's an American Girl video called Chrissa Stands Tall. It's excellent. The girls in the video are a little older than 3rd grade, but my 3rd grade girls identified with it and got the message. It's well worth the few $ and the time to show it....the boys got the message, too!


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a couple of things i've done
Old 02-09-2011, 08:40 AM
 
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I teach 3rd grade single-gender...all girls! I have definitely had some of the same issues. Here are a couple of things that have seemed to "stick" with my girls.

*The movie another poster mentioned: Charissa Stands Strong, from American Girl. There are also tons of resources related to the movie on the AG website. We watched the movie and used some of the site resources to have small group/class discussions. The movie has many parallels to The Hundred Dresses, so it's a great way for the girls to make connections.

*During a class meeting I take a piece of plain white paper and cut out a heart shape. We imagine that this new/clean heart represents the heart of a girl who has never been bullied/made fun of, etc. Then I have the girls say things outloud that they have heard (or even said themselves) that are hurtful. As they say them I crumple the heart, tear it a little, basically mess it up. Then I ask them if it can ever be the same. We "try" as a class to make it look like it did before. They say apologies, offer "gifts" etc., while I try to flatten the heart and make it look nice and clean again. To wrap up, we talk about how once those hurtful words are said the heart can never be truly like it was before. Apologies can help...but once we use hurtful words they cannot be truly "erased". I display the heart somewhere around the room for the rest of the year as a reminder. The girls seem to remember the lesson.

*We "talk behind each other's backs"...but ONLY in a good way. Each girl gets a chance to sit on my stool at the front of the room, she turns around, and then we all take turns talking about her "behind her back." We say only kind and encouraging things about her, of course. It seems to be a good visual reminder about the kinds of things we should say about one another...even if our friends aren't around!

Hope these things are helpful...best of lucky with your lovely ladies!
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