Let me first say I love my children and for the most part I enjoy their parents, but I had a parent complain to my principal that his beloved child's grade had dropped from a 97.6 to a 96. I do teach at a private school and parent involvement is always high, but he demanded to know why his child's grades had dropped. Its still an A. *sigh* Then they're telling me she's having break downs at home because they are forcing more work on her after she's already done work all day. Again I say *sigh*. So to make this parent happy (at the request of my principal) I'm adding to my already busy classroom schedule to accomodate for this student (and other because I don't want them to think I'm singling her out) to have more advanced work. Oh and I forgot another complaint he had was that I called the kids "sweetheart" and "hun"... I call everybody sweetheart or hun... Can they ever be pleased, hun? How do you guys deal with "helicopter parents" or the parents who think their child's grades in second grade will help them get into Harvard?
Last edited by BookWorm22; 02-09-2012 at 10:19 AM..
Reason: Added more information
First, I think the parent is totally out of control, can you imagine the anxiety this little girl is facing in 2nd grade!!!
Depending on how many grades you averaged this time, it could actually equate to the same grade. We just had this conversation at our 'data day' because on our Benchmark Assessment there were 5 less questions than 1st quarter, so if a child missed the same number on each test (or one less on the second test) the percentage actually went down for doing the same work or one question better. We had to explain why several children seemed to have lower scores this time and we had to point that out.
I tried to make it a habit of calling them 'honey' because I am worried if I don't have a 'safe' word to call them, I worry what might slip out!!! Just kidding- sort of.
He'd probably holler for my resignation!!! He kept telling my principal over and over again that he wanted her to get scholarships... she's in second grade!!! I believe in high expectation, but they need to be grounded in reality also...
this is how my bff was raised. She was actually spanked up until she left for college for any grades not an A. If she had an A- she was not allowed to play. I look back now amazed she was even allowed to be friends with me!
by the time she finished her undergrad she had full blown ulcers. She is now an attorney who is trying to balance a full blown career with regular steps up the ladder, a 3yo with a wide variety of special needs dealing with behavior and diet diagnoses and a house.
I get to visit her once a year and we have an awesome time but I wonder sometimes what if she let one of those balls drop?
This sounds familiar! I also work at a private school (for gifted kids) and they are always telling me things like "Well, Billy can count to 1000 at home - why do you say that he's only counting to 100 at school ??" or they are wanting a 4 year old to be placed in a 1st grade math workbook. Pushy parents drive me nuts! And of course, since it's a private school, pretty much anything they want, I have to give them. It doesn't matter if I know it's totally developmentally inappropriate for the child! I'm so "done" with it.
"Well, Billy can count to 1000 at home - why do you say that he's only counting to 100 at school ??"
I know. Isn't that crazy?
Our parents don't see report card grades as percentages and we don't have online grade books so that helps. They can only see test scores which aren't what they'd hoped for.
I'm grateful the parents don't (usually!) run my school. It's been hard for them, though. Our former P gave into them too much, but our current one doesn't.
Isn't this a form of abuse? I have written about my former career at the Rock...we were paying insurance claims on 2 brothers whose Professor father always expected sons to be A+ students. When they weren't the question was why not? Long story short, both sons were committed to a mental hospital and their lifetime maximum on benefits of $1,000,000 had been met. So, I really do wonder about parents and the pressure they place on their children
I had a student a few years ago who was grounded if her average ever slipped below a 95. I'm all for high expectations and wanting students to do their best, but there has to be a line. This girl was so stressed, and as a result had stomach problems all year. I had another student with similar parents, and she did get a B, and it was the end of the world. Those were really difficult years.
This story is why I think that all marks should be Not Meeting, Meeting, Exceeding Standards or for simpler language: Fail, Pass, With Distinction. This would make our lives SO much easier.
Fail, Pass and With Distinction is a good idea. But of course I'd have that same parent begging me for a quantative reasoning why something was "with distinction" and whatnot. Its getting to the point that a lot of the teachers don't want the student in their class cause the parent is a pain in the butt. Can't say I blame them... I did just find out that I will not be looping through with them to third grade, but I'll be teaching the first grade. It'll be the first year in almost seven that I've taught a single grade classroom... I think my boss just figured how they're stressing me out.... Only took five of the seven years to figure it out.... Geesh....
I was that kid growing up, to a certain extent. I rebelled by taking a non-AP class that lowered my GPA, knowing it'd knock me out of position for being valedictorian, AND I refused to retake the SATs when I didn't get a perfect score. Life went on, and I got into the college of my choice anyway. My parents learned to be proud of me for who I was as a person rather than some arbitrary mark on a paper.
We have numerical grades that are similar to fail, pass, and with distinction. Essentially, they indicate below grade level, meeting grade level expectations, and exceeding grade level expectations. While it has taken some getting used to for parents and staff alike, I believe this grading system has alleviated a lot of this type of problem. Depending on an assessment, a student could miss a few questions and still receive a score of meeting grade level expectations. Sometimes a student will ask me why they received the 3.0 (meeting expectations) and not the 3.5 or 4.0 (exceeding), but I've yet to have a parent come in and demand the higher score.
Also, we do allow students to revise any assessment or assignment and resubmit for a higher score.
02-09-2012, 09:40 AM
It doesn't matter if I know it's totally developmentally inappropriate for the child! I'm so "done" with it.
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