defiant, disruptive, and downright mean - ProTeacher Community


Home Join Now Search My Favorites
Help


      Classroom Management

defiant, disruptive, and downright mean

>

Reply
 
Thread Tools
MissGranger MissGranger is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 18
New Member

MissGranger
 
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 18
New Member
defiant, disruptive, and downright mean
Old 10-26-2017, 05:20 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #1

Hi all,

I would appreciate some tips/advice with dealing with an unruly student. (Sorry, this is going to be long)

First of all, I teach 5th grade at a high-needs school. There is a lot of poverty in the area and many behavioral issues through the school. I have my hands full with many behaviors in my class this year, and I have come to terms with the fact that it's going to be a rough year! However, I have one student in particular who I am really struggling with. She is downright defiant and disrespectful. She bullies other students, refuses to comply when she doesn't "get her way" and throws what I see as temper-tantrums at least once a week. Apparently she has a history of these behaviors in other classes.


For example, she got into trouble during specials and was instructed by that teacher to miss recess. This had nothing to do with me at all, but she took it out on me and the entire class. During the morning I had a parent-volunteer in the room helping around the class. At this time, the student became totally unruly. She began banging her book non-stop against the desk. I walked over calmly, and tried to remove the book from her hands. She then pulled it away and screamed (literally) "NO! I don't have to give it to you" in my face. I then removed the desk in front of her instead. Of course she proceeded to continue to talk back, and even went as far to say she doesn't care what I take from her, and that maybe she will "throw her chair at me or another kid". She also "hates me", wishes she "still had so and so as her teacher" etc. This does not bother me at all, however, it upsets the other kids-which does bother me. Finally she calmed down a bit, but after lunch, it all started again (I'm assuming because that teacher took her recess so she had to sit it out). She went into the classroom without permission while the rest of the class took a bathroom break. Once we got into class, she told another student "stop looking at me- you are ugly" in front of the class. She then threw all of her notebooks away, folders, name tag etc, again stating, "I hate this class, I hate you (to me)" etc. Of course during this time I'm trying to teach and ignore her, but she definitely longs for that attention. She began humming loudly during a lesson on purpose and at this time another parent volunteer was in the room and was totally in shock about this behavior! Needless to say, I spoke to her guardian about all of these issues. He has told me each time (I speak to him frequently) he doesn't even know what to do with her, she acts this way at home.

I have tried the nurturing approach, I've tried ignoring her behaviors, I've tried being very stern/strict with her, I've had her call her dad in the middle of the day to let him know what she is doing.
I've tried everything in between-but she is so defiant and insanely disrespectful.

I would appreciate any tips/tricks to deal with students like this!


MissGranger is offline   Reply With Quote

Ucan Ucan is online now
 
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 85
Junior Member

Ucan
 
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 85
Junior Member

Old 10-30-2017, 02:26 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #2

Ask your school psychologist if he/she would come into your classroom to observe this student. Then ask for suggestions based on what was observed.
Ucan is online now   Reply With Quote
apple annie apple annie is offline
 
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,501
Senior Member

apple annie
 
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,501
Senior Member

Old 10-31-2017, 08:19 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #3

You have to have a classroom management plan and follow it. Remind her of the plan, and then do it. For example: first offense, warning . Second offense, time out in the back of the classroom, third offense, lost recess. Fourth (and final) offense, remove from the classroom, call dad and have him pick her up from the office. Do this every day if you need to. Be calm but non-reactive. No lectures, no discussion, just action. By the way, make sure it's the same plan you use with every student, not just her.
apple annie is offline   Reply With Quote
MissGranger MissGranger is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 18
New Member

MissGranger
 
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 18
New Member

Old 11-01-2017, 03:02 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #4

Thank you for your advice! I think I need to stop hesitating to call dad. She gets to that fourth chance at least once weekly. I hate to give her what she wants, because I think calling him is what she wants. I do have issues with her complying- so trying to get her to sit at the back or remove her from the class is a task in itself! But I suppose once she surpasses those offenses I automatically call the parent.
MissGranger is offline   Reply With Quote
MissGranger MissGranger is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 18
New Member

MissGranger
 
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 18
New Member

Old 11-01-2017, 03:03 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #5

Thanks- I agree. I'm concerned with how quickly her entire demeanor can change when something small sets her off.


MissGranger is offline   Reply With Quote
dee's Avatar
dee dee is offline
 
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 6,062
Senior Member

dee
 
dee's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 6,062
Senior Member
Inconvenience the parent
Old 11-01-2017, 02:48 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #6

Each and every time.
If nothing helps, it may help along getting counseling, either in school or outside.
dee is offline   Reply With Quote
MathWA's Avatar
MathWA MathWA is online now
 
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 4,791
Senior Member

MathWA
 
MathWA's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 4,791
Senior Member

Old 11-02-2017, 01:52 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #7

Your princess has a lot of explosive anger so that tells me that there is whole story (abuse, abandonment etc?) about why she is so angry. You mentioned that she has a guardian so is she a foster child? Involvng the school psychologist makes a lot of sense because she neeeds serious counseling in order to have a successful rest of her life. Your school psychologist probably cant provide this counseling but he/she mght be able to connect her with someone who does. In the meantime she must behave in your class.

All students must feel safe.If she threatens to hurt other kids by throwing chairs etc. then call the prince and remove the rest of the students from the room. I would recommend having the prince remove the girl but this can become a violent situation which your other students should not see. She cannot be allowed to continue threaten or harm others and this includes you.

Honestly? I didnt have much success calling parents at my VERY low income school because many of the parents had parenting issues which were at the core of misbehavior. You mentioned that the Dad had the same problems with princess at home and he didnt know what to do. Not a good indicator which will change the situation.

At my beloved school, kids respect structure and power. My kids came from chaos at home so having a lot of structure in the classroom helped students to feel safe and cared for. Power at my school means that teachers respect kids and kids ALWAYS respect teachers. This means that teachers must be very very strong with expectations, rewards and consequences.

So lets talk about consequences. Your princess really did not like staying in from recess so this might be an appropriate consequence for her bad behavior. Its your way or the highway to staying in at recess. She needs to learn that choosing good behavior is much better than the consequences of being a twit.

When she stays in from recess your have the perfect opportunity to talk. You might find out a lot about the root of her issues. She will also learn a lot about you and that you care enough to go the mile for her. Hopefully she will finally end up doing what you want her to do because she has learned to love her teacher. This takes time and usually developed for me around December of each year. This was one of my finest rewards when teaching.

You sound like a wonderful teacher who cares greatly about students. What a perfect matchup for this little girl who needs so much. You can change her life.

Last edited by MathWA; 11-02-2017 at 05:39 PM..
MathWA is online now   Reply With Quote
Ucan Ucan is online now
 
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 85
Junior Member

Ucan
 
Joined: Sep 2017
Posts: 85
Junior Member
Exactly
Old 11-15-2017, 03:12 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #8

MathWa hit it dead center!!! In the few successful high-needs schools that I've had the pleasure of working at, all the teachers were recruited for their strong classroom management skills. You could walk into any classroom at these schools and witness the highly-structured procedures and feel the power of the teacher. They were never reluctant to impose the necessary consequences for any student who stepped out of line. Students like your princess are adept at taking advantage of the most minute crack in your approach. Often, it's just a matter of following through with your own expectations.

Think of the approach most often used to teach dogs and cats - cause and effect. The same approach works amazingly well with humans in a classroom setting. Of course, she may also benefit from counseling, etc.
Ucan is online now   Reply With Quote
short_bread's Avatar
short_bread short_bread is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 255
Full Member

short_bread
 
short_bread's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 255
Full Member
Restorative Discipline
Old 11-16-2017, 05:33 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #9

At my school, we are being trained in something called "restorative discipline." The long short of this is, once the student has caused some sort of harm, they need to have some sort of consequence. However, that consequence needs to make sense. Basically, once the child has cooled off, we ask "what happened?" "How can I help you next time?" and then and most importantly, "what are you going to do to make this right?"

Now I know what you're thinking....I can't get her to do anything! But what I'm thinking is that this student seems like she needs someone who refuses to be scared away by her behavior. Her M.O. is if I act up people will think I'm as bad as I feel about myself and they will leave me alone.

My other bit of advice is similar to what has been suggested. There needs to be some sort of contingency plan. If you do this then this happens and it happens predictably and regularly. I know you are at a high needs school and I'm not sure how much support you will get. At my school, we have a behaviorist. I happen to have a student with special needs that can get really aggressive. I can always call the behaviorist when I see him about to blow up, so I can remove him before anything really bad happens.

Sorry I rattled. I hope some of that helps. I know its really hard. I've been where you are. All we can do is do our best and hope that something sticks.
short_bread is offline   Reply With Quote

Join the conversation! Post as a guest or become a member today. New members welcome!

Reply

 

>
Classroom Management
Thread Tools




Sign Up Now

Sign Up FREE | ProTeacher Help | BusyBoard

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 03:51 PM.

Copyright © 2017 ProTeacher®
For individual use only. Do not copy, reproduce or transmit.
source: www.proteacher.net