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How to bring up idea of retention with a parent
Old 02-01-2018, 07:06 PM
 
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I have a student that I was hoping would mature by this point. I teach first grade. He has had behavior issues in prek (even had to transfer schools because of his behavior) and also in kindergarten. Every year since prek the teachers have suggested that this student be retained. He just made the cutoff for kindergarten so he is almost a year younger than most of the kids in the class. On top of that, he is EXTREMELY immature. He is obsessed with talking about peeing, pooping, and farting. ALL. DAY. LONG. He doesn't follow directions, can't walk in line, can't sit on the carpet, talks very loudly, no impulse control, etc. He physically also is much tinier than others. On top of that, he is low academically. He is a smart boy but just can't seem to focus during lessons or practice skills without extreme teacher support. Just seems to me like he just needs more time.

I spoke to my principal about recommending that he be retained next year. He supported me but wanted me to immediately schedule a meeting with the parents. They have been okay with me, but not sure how to bring up the idea of retention. Want to bring it up in a non-aggressive, positive way. I am going to have a hard time being positive because their child has been so disrespectful and has thrown my entire class off since September. Would like some tips on how to start the conversation. Thanks!!


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Retention
Old 02-01-2018, 08:13 PM
 
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We always used the phrase "give them the gift of time."

They need to mature in their brain to be able to retain needed curriculum.

I used to tell my parents "push this out to high school. What do you think it's going to look like?"
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Old 02-01-2018, 08:29 PM
 
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I would start with an evaluation plan to rule out a specific learning disability and go from there. Retention could be a strategy used to give the child more time to mature but I would recommend an evaluation.
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Old 02-01-2018, 09:05 PM
 
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I have that same child (except for the tiny size), but he's in 4th grade!! He is the only child I have ever had to speak to his mom at conference about him farting in class. All. The. Time. Everything is hilarious. So immature!! His mom is coming in to talk to me tomorrow. I am praying for the right words to say. I pray you find the right ones too.
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Average Child vs. The Child in Your Post
Old 02-02-2018, 04:22 PM
 
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Just a few ideas...

I would begin by sharing work samples of an average child (remove name) and the child in your post.

I would also have a list of June kindergarten and June first grade expectations, and where the child lies on this continuum.

I would also share the behavior documentation you have collected for this child.

Yup...sounds like retention for maturity would be a good idea.


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Old 02-11-2018, 08:23 AM
 
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I used this in the meeting! Thanks! They responded really well. Thank you so much for the advice everybody. They were very happy with the points I brought up and the fact that I am having this conversation in February rather than June. Hope they do retain him, but hope he does NOT come back to my class. I think I would quit lol
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