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Sometimes itís hard to not be sad
Old 12-06-2020, 06:01 AM
 
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I remind myself I am fortunate, but now that weíre starting another lockdown where I live (grocery stores, drugstores, and take-out still open), Iím having a hard time. I remind myself others are struggling far more than I, but I am feeling discouraged. I know this isnít realistic, but I want everyone to take this pandemic as seriously as I do. Sometimes I think Iím lucky I only have to take care of myself in this mess, while other times I desperately miss family and friends.

I hope Iím not becoming self-absorbed and selfish.

How are you doing these days?


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Old 12-06-2020, 06:44 AM
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Feelings
Old 12-06-2020, 07:05 AM
 
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I do not think the fact you miss spending the with friends and family makes you selfish at all. I cannot think of anyone I know who doesn't wish life could be "normal". I think that makes us all human. We can only control our own individual actions as frustrating as that is. Stay well, my friend.
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Old 12-06-2020, 07:21 AM
 
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I understand. I have those same feelings - sadness and anger. Sometimes I feel like a whole year of my life has been wasted and I miss my family and friends. Then I feel selfish because I know so many are having a much harder time than I. I am financially stable and so many are not / I don't have to worry about work or young kids in this situation.

I worry because I am normally very easy-going and tolerant toward others, but I feel so extremely angry toward those who refuse to wear masks and endanger my family members and me. That just feels so out of character for me to be so angry.

I know one thing that has changed for me is that I have always loved the small town area where I have lived all my life, but there are so many here who refuse to wear masks/take it seriously/and who have the political views that have helped make this much worse than it had to be. This has made me look at people around here differently and even consider moving when this is over because I don't know if I will ever feel the same again.

I didn't mean to go on so long. However, I do feel like our basic personalities and outlooks are still there and hopefully we will get them back soon. I am trying to focus on positive things. Hang in there!
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Old 12-06-2020, 08:10 AM
 
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I don't think you are selfish at all. I feel the same way. My DH and I have been so careful, and it makes me so angry to read about and see pictures of people ignoring social distancing and mask wearing. They are the reason we have not been able to keep the virus under control. I have also changed my views about some people based on this crisis. I can't wait until the vaccine is widely available.
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I get it
Old 12-06-2020, 08:23 AM
 
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I'm getting more depressed. It irks me when I see out of state folks renting homes in my resort neighborhood....and then our Covid #spike. How can people go on vacation? It bugs me seeing politicians traveling around. No one seems to understand sacrifice.



Last edited by Irish; 12-07-2020 at 06:11 AM..
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Old 12-06-2020, 08:51 AM
 
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Iím right there with you. Normally I can spend lots of time alone with no problem but a year???? Itís too much!!!
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Sad
Old 12-06-2020, 09:07 AM
 
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I am about to hit another Covid Fatigue state. Itís a real thing, especially for those of us who have really hunkered down. No place to go, no new places to see. The repetition sets in and feels hopeless.

I was just starting to venture out a teeny bit, when it looks like itís all getting shut down again.

Iím trying to have small goals/something to look forward to each week. Making a few cards for special friends, an Alice tea cup for a niece, a actual outdoor lunch with a special friend.

Tomorrow, I plan to sit down and write a long, long letter to my best friend. We havenít seen each other in almost a year and I miss her so much my heart hurts.

The fatigue and hope tend to come in waves, one replacing the other. I have decided to just surf those waves to the best of my ability.
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I so understand!
Old 12-06-2020, 09:36 AM
 
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I should be grateful that I am healthy, but this is hard for me, too. I moved here 5 years ago to be near my daughter and grands, and I am thankful for that, but I also left some really good friends a state away. Living by myself is ok, until I feel lonely for no reason. The holidays should be a happy time, but I don't always feel that way. This year has been playing with my mind! I am usually an upbeat person, and now I feel like I am faking it. I will keep going and hope that next year will be much better for all of us.
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Old 12-06-2020, 10:15 AM
 
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I can't even get excited enough to put up our Christmas tree and decorations. I'm a Grinch this year. Blah!
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Sometimes
Old 12-06-2020, 12:54 PM
 
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I hear you. This is getting weary. I had a full flown melt-down Thursday night... Staying in had been easy before surgery because I hurt so much. My recovery isn't going as fast because I'm still basically staying home. The Covid numbers have jumped drastically and so just venturing out to do a bit of shopping or eat a meal is risky.
Zoomed church service again today and began crying when I saw the sanctuary decorated with the poinsettias. Last time I was there physically Lent had just begun.
I'm glad for PT and the opportunity to at least interact on-line each day.


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Old 12-06-2020, 02:25 PM
 
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I'm growing weary of pandemic procedures too. Isolating from family and friends has caused a strange kind of exhaustion. The less I do the less I feel like doing. I live the life of ease compared to so many and I appreciate that. I'm frustrated that I allow myself be discouraged.
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Definitely not self-absorbed or selfish...
Old 12-06-2020, 02:31 PM
 
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I miss life as I knew it. Today, I went to a holiday market and sped through it, focusing on others not socially distancing in many cases, although all wore masks. I drove by my favorite lakeside restaurant on the way home, longing for lunch, but not comfortable with inside dining, and seeing cars there with many who obviously were. I miss my weekday matinee movies in theaters and lunch with friends. I miss the days of not thinking of masks and remembering to bring them with me. I miss Broadway shows, concerts and travel.

I am grateful so far I am healthy and not infected with the virus. I have two pensions, Medicare and Social Security. I have plenty of food and my mortgage is paid off. Life could be a lot worse.
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Suggestion
Old 12-06-2020, 02:47 PM
 
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All of you who have posted need to read today's (Sunday) message from Maria Shriver.

It is free and so well done.

I subscribe and get notices for her posts on Wednesday and Sunday.
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Thanks for sharing
Old 12-06-2020, 04:33 PM
 
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Your responses have helped me more than you will ever know. Thank you for sharing your feelings. You are what makes PT such a helpful, comforting place.
I have many of the same feelings of being discouraged. I am surprised at how much I miss a short trip to Target, Dollar Tree, or even WalMart. I do have many things to be very grateful for in my life and I need to remember and be grateful.
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Old 12-06-2020, 05:08 PM
 
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I am struggling a lot lately. My state has such a high positivity rate and like the rest of you miss spending fun times with family and friends. It would be so nice to go to a restaurant or even grocery shopping without wondering how careful everyone else is being. I am pretty good at keeping myself busy, but at times I get an overwhelming feeling of sadness. On Friday I found out that two people I know passed away from COVID on Thursday within hours of each other. . They are the first ones that I personally have known (one a former coworkerówe belonged to the same book club for years, the other the husband of a dear friend and former coworker).

I am generally a positive person and on the outside I am keeping that facade, but I am just tired of it all. Putting up Christmas decorations even brought on melancholy.

So, no, you are not being selfish. (Or alone with struggling ) These are difficult and trying times.
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Old 12-06-2020, 05:45 PM
 
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I am totally frustrated rather than sad. More people losing jobs and right before Christmas. I wish they would focus on fining people who won't wear masks and breaking up parties. That is where the spread is.
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Old 12-06-2020, 07:22 PM
 
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I feel the same way. My husband and I were full time RVers before Covid hit. We traveled full-time. We are usually in Florida this time of year, visiting my mother-in-law. Last year we took a side trip to Disney World. the year before we toured St. Augustine. We bought a house over the summer to settle into and ride out the Pandemic. We live close to my son and his family and my daughter. They all work at home, and we only interact with each other. It is wonderful to be close to them and watch my first grandson grow. We all are healthy and have steady income. I am fortunate. However, I still have many days when I am very down. I miss my friends, I miss going to church, and I miss spending time to volunteering. We have wonderful new neighbors who would love to have us over. But with Covid, we have to put it off. I have friends who are still traveling the country, going to restaurants, not wearing masks. My family is trying to do what is right and not contract or spread the disease. I am beginning to get very frustrated.

Then I remind myself to focus on the things I can do rather than what I can't. I love Christmas lights.We put out a bunch in our yard. Many nights we go out and drive to different neighborhood to look at their lights and to different light displays. We watch church online. Since we aren't out and about, we have saved money. We have been spending time (rather than volunteering) finding worthwhile charities to donate to. All of this has helped, but I am still definitely feeling Covid fatigue.
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Old 12-06-2020, 07:50 PM
 
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Iím frustrated, angry, sad, and keep reminding myself to be grateful.

Iím losing respect for some family members and how they are so cavalier about safety.
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doing fine in the mist
Old 12-07-2020, 06:24 AM
 
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We are doing fine, considering we are in the mist of a pandemic that has yet to run it's course. We can either sit here and be sad, or count our blessings:
We are counting are blessings.
Family and friends are doing our part in staying safe.
We can see our grandchildren, even if it is from a distance/photo/phone/zoom
We have not lost income.
We have everything we need.
We are not "shut off from the world as far a getting news, food/supplies, communication with others.
We keep busy with hobbies.
We can take part in church services through the computer.
We can pray anywhere and any time of day.
We choose to sit here and not be discouraged.
When we think about our blessing compared to people in ICU, or those who have lost family members to the virus... how can we be having a "hard time" compared to those people/family? We can't.

I hope we all can choose to look for our inner strength and count our blessings. Hope we all can have a good day today!
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Old 12-07-2020, 08:28 AM
 
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Yes, wildflower...it is hard to see people we love and respect not acting responsibly. I , like amiga....find myself feeling very sad some days and wonder whether we'll ever get out of this. But I try to not listen to too much news or read too much on the Internet, Just keep doing what you think is best for yourself and those around you. I'm 700 miles from "home" since March, but maybe by the time March rolls around again....I'll feel safe enough to return home. I take some comfort in knowing that scientists predicted a second wave and sure enough...we're in it! Hope everyone stays safe and relatively positive we can get through this wave again. Better days are coming!
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I think we all hit that point at times...
Old 12-09-2020, 06:27 PM
 
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Our state restricts nothing despite the hospital being so full that I heard they are routing people to WA.
Still I have put a lot of mandates on myself b/c I have an older dad and family that I don't want to get sick.
It is lasting a bit long and 1 day, I broke down and went into a big store to just have fun shopping.
I enjoyed it a lot even though I knew it wasn't the safest place. 90% of the people do not wear masks around here.
We all order online groceries normally and I do not even do restaurant "take out."
The only real restrictions I know about are the schools closed b/c of being in what they call a red zone a couple of months ago.
I think Grande Meme (SP?) has a point though of counting our blessings b/c it does uplift us.
If you did not set up a bubble, can you start 1 now? Maybe some of your friends/ family feel the same way and are willing to commit to being very cautious.
I really miss some of my friends, but all we can do is talk on the phone now. I guess I need to be thankful for my phone. I actually lost it a few days ago, but realized it was in a different bag than I usually keep it in....
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Old 12-10-2020, 03:41 AM
 
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Iím tired of not being able to get out and about like normal but manage to keep busy at home with the pets and many sewing and crochet projects. I bake and cook, work in the yard, and tend my bird baths/feeders. Keeping busy is the key. I really recommend that everyone take up a hobby if you donít have one. Learn something new that keeps you busy and you can lose yourself in.
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Old 12-11-2020, 07:54 AM
 
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Sad too. I feel like I will never hug my daughter again. I know of a few people who went to family thanksgiving dinners and are now testing positive. Others who are going to the ďclosedĒ nail and hair salons. I feel that many of my acquaintances who say they are masking and avoiding people outside their own home are lying
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