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mrs.carney mrs.carney is offline
 
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Ideas for student crying
Old 09-04-2014, 04:24 PM
 
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I have a first grader who is crying every morning, wanting his mom. Tomorrow we will finish our third full week of school, so I feel like it should be getting better, but it seems to get worse every day. Any ideas on how to help?
Here are some things I've tried:
-ignoring it
-one-on-one conversation to make sure it isn't something me or a student is doing
-his mom tried bringing him to school one day (way worse)
-he has been going to the counselor all this week before school and they email his mom and talk. He gets calmed down and seems fine, but starts bawling again when she brings him back to class.

Other important information...his mom just had a baby in April (he was the baby before) and she decided to stay at home with this one.


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Old 09-04-2014, 04:29 PM
 
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Hmm....I've got a crier in second grade. Bawling. Because she's older and it's more manipulative, I've been blunt. She's not going to the counselor unless it's for a good day. If she doesn't cry, the counselor is in. If she's balling, nope. Positive attention for making it through parts of the day without being insane. But that was only after we've figured out that it's not another kid being mean. She's not going home.
When she's doing well, I try to give her a bit of extra attention and ask her to help out with stuff.
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Perhaps
Old 09-04-2014, 04:36 PM
 
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This might work, when one of my kindergarteners are having trouble with separation issues I suggest that the child brings in a picture of their family and I post it in their cubbie ( maybe their pencil box, if applicable). It seems to help them if they can glance at the photo during the day. I also suggest to the child to go sit in our rocking chair until they are ready to join the class and hand them a Kleenex. I then continue with our activity ( usually a fast song or interesting story). Hope this might help your crier.
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A no crying call home
Old 09-04-2014, 05:24 PM
 
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I teach K & have at least 1 crier each year. This works for me

I would tell him that he is a big boy & brother now and his mother doesn't want him to cry at school. So, he must make his mom proud by not crying.

Then, you can tell him that you will call his mom at the end of the day to let her know that he did not cry---a positive no cry report. I also tell the student how proud I am too.
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Transition
Old 09-04-2014, 09:41 PM
 
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Sounds like he just needs time. The more you feed into it the worse it gets. From now on , keep with the routine and keep things as predictable as possible. He will move on once he "forgets" this situation. The more you bring attention to it the worse it will get.
If he is crying really loudly and distracting others, you could have a "quiet time" spot where he could sit when needed to calm down .


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Old 09-05-2014, 01:42 AM
 
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Seeing it from his point of view, I guess it would seem kind of horrible. As long as he can remember, mom has gone off to work and he's gone off to daycare and then kindergarten. It might not have been great, but everyone was in the same boat, so it was OK.

This summer, though, he's been with her all the time, and gotten very used to that. So he's going through now what the kids with SAHMs go through at the very beginning of preschool. (But without the shorter day to make it easier.) On top of that, the baby still gets what he just finally got and lost. So he probably feels like he's done something wrong to be "sent away".

I would tell him frequently how glad you are to have him in your class, and point out what great things he can do in school that the baby can't yet - but that someday the baby will be old enough to come to school, and he or she is probably so jealous of big brother.

And, if you or the counselor can get away with it, I would suggest to mom some one-on-one outings with your student while someone else watches the baby. He needs reassurance that she's still his mom too, and that she enjoys spending time with him.
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stuffed animal
Old 09-05-2014, 05:08 PM
 
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I always let my teary ones choose a stuffed animal I have in the classroom to sit with. That seems to help too...a bit of a distraction.
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Old 09-06-2014, 04:43 PM
 
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Thanks everyone! There is some great advice here. It seems like it will be a trial-and-error sort of thing. He saw the counselor every day this week before school, and I'm already a little afraid he's becoming dependent on that. I'm hoping next week will be better!
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Crying
Old 10-07-2014, 02:19 PM
 
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Give the child something to drink. It's a known fact (child or adult) that you cannot cry and drink at the same time.
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