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catlover9 catlover9 is offline
 
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Never Enough
Old 11-13-2015, 08:05 PM
 
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After years of 'playing teacher' as a kid and 4 and a half years of college studying to be one, I am now in my first few months as a classroom teacher and I just get this sinking feeling like I am never good enough and no matter how much time I spend (17.5 hours one Friday, AHHH!) it's just not enough. Luckily, I do feel like I get a lot done in the time I spend and I am very productive but it leaves me exhausted and eventually beginning to resent the profession I wanted to be my joy in life.

After graduating I did some long term subbing and intervention and felt the stress but now with my own room in a data-driven world, I feel like I can barely keep my head above water. There is so much "extra" required that I really feel like is burning out not only myself (and other teachers) but the students as well!

I know the kind of teacher I've wanted to be and the kind of person I want to be but I'm realizing that it's just not possible. I do as much as I can and dedicate my everything to this but no matter what, there's a sinking failing feeling in one way or another. I guess I just am losing that sight of why I want to do this if I don't feel good enough doing it. If all I feel I am doing is keeping up with data and 'busy' work and etc. then I am spending time doing what I have to and have no time for what I want to and need to do for the kids. Maybe it's a matter of priorities and being new, I will find those out, but I just wonder what I can do that will be an easier load such as a different type of position or placement. At the same time, it hurts me to think I am straying away from that thing I so was to love just to have more of a life.

Has anyone felt this way and found a solution or something to help?


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(((Catlover9)))
Old 11-13-2015, 09:27 PM
 
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Hey! Welcome! And take a deep breath! First year teaching is SO hard!!! I used to cry on the way home every day. Do you have a mentor? Any other new teachers you can bond with since you are going through the same thing? Everything is new, and that feels overwhelming. Please don't give up. I've been teaching almost 30 years, and it's the best job ever, even with all the demands. Give it a chance. We need good teachers, and will be here to support you.

I am still learning to prioritize, as I tend to want to do everything at once. Now I make lists of high priority, medium, and low. It helps me stay focused on what must be done now, and what can wait. Reach out to your colleagues when you have questions. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable, we've all been where you are now! It does get easier!
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First year is terrible!
Old 11-14-2015, 01:53 AM
 
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I am a mentor to new teachers, and every year I say to the newbies that the first year is awful since you are doing everything from scratch and everything is brand new and stressful. Find time for yourself every day and every week. Next year will be so much better.

Every year when I check in with the 2nd year teachers, every single one has always said that I was right! They also are more confident and relaxed and don't look so exhausted.

Take care of yourself, find time for yourself, and know your second year will be less stressful!
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Oncidium Oncidium is offline
 
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Old 11-14-2015, 07:45 AM
 
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What other jobs have you had besides teaching? I am wondering because you seem young. This is a salaried, "management" position, in a way. Average hours can be 80 per week or more for those kinds of positions. And yes, there are a ton of headaches.
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catlover9 catlover9 is offline
 
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Old 11-14-2015, 01:41 PM
 
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Thank you all for the words of advice!


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