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Someone I know insists on seeing her parents
Old 03-26-2020, 05:37 AM
  #1

Her parents are in their 60s and she's starting to wonder what's the point of staying away from them if younger people are catching the virus as well. I would say this person is on acquaintance level with me but hearing her say that was concerning. It's hard to just say well it's her choice. What would you all have done?


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Old 03-26-2020, 05:40 AM
  #2

I probably wouldn't have said anything. I am trying to only give advice to people like my sister-who is forced to hear my opinion (and me hers).
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Old 03-26-2020, 05:46 AM
  #3

Quote:
what's the point of staying away from them if younger people are catching the virus as well.
Because it's not about her?

I probably would have pointed that out and explained about flattening the curve once more.

I like the quote that's been going around recently, "Don't change your behavior so you don't catch the virus. Assume you have it and change your behavior so that you don't transmit it."
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Oh my
Old 03-26-2020, 05:49 AM
  #4

My DH is 62 and I am not far behind. We have been strictly social distancing and following the restrictions set by our governor and local leaders. DD2's job has ended due to the virus and her next job won't start for six weeks. She has a bunch of stuff to drop off and other stuff to pick up.

We don't want her to come home. She has not been practicing social distancing and there has been a case of the virus at the ski slope where she works. Did she have contact? Probably not. But she is hanging out with all the other people that have been furloughed.

We are going to tell her to social distance strictly for 2 weeks before she even thinks about coming home. Barring that, she can give us a list of what she needs and we will leave it on the porch. We'll talk to her from six feet away, but won't let her in the house. DD1 wants us to be even stricter, and calls every day to make sure we are following protocols.

And the point is- anyone can catch the virus. Anyone can die from the virus. But the death rate is higher for older populations. And... if we look at hard hit countries, scarce ventilators may be prioritized to younger people with a better chance of recovery.
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Old 03-26-2020, 07:02 AM
  #5

Well, there's a stunning lack of logic.

Right now, all people should stay away from people that they don't have to see face-to-face. Anyone can get the virus, anyone can be symptom-free and still pass it on to others, anyone can get seriously ill, but older people are more likely to die. How is that so hard to understand?

That's probably what I would say although I'd try to phrase it in a kinder, less judgmental way.


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Like some have said...
Old 03-26-2020, 07:48 AM
  #6

It's not about not getting it. It's about not spreading it. We haven't been able to see our grandchildren since this thing started, but it doesn't look like we will be seeing them for a while. We can zoom, and facetime and text, but it's not the same. Nonetheless, I will not put them or myself at risk by goint to see them. DH still works his part time job at Chick Fila. They have made it as safe as possible, but things can still happen. We aren't going out except to restock groceries once a week.
DH is a pastor as well. We have a small congregation of about 60. We plan to have services on the parking lot in our cars on Sunday. We will put a speaker outside, they will sit in their cars, bring their own communion with them, and we will do the best we can that way. We're trying to think of every way possible to minimize any risk.
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Social distancing
Old 03-26-2020, 08:20 AM
  #7

I would tell your friend to back off. She can talk to her parents on the telephone, or at a distance outside her parents' home. She should also be careful about taking things to them since the virus can live on surfaces for hours to days. My parents are 69 and 70. I visited one day almost two weeks ago. My husband and I felt like we were helping them because we brought food. Later I was so bothered by it. My mother wiped things down. I suggested opening a window and letting the sunshine in for a little while. Yesterday we took them some frozen meat. I handed it off from the porch and told them I wouldn't come in. It was awkward and I don't think my father thought it was necessary, but I didn't go in. I think your friend should act similarly.
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I would remind her
Old 03-26-2020, 09:53 AM
  #8

that young people are being infected with the virus and almost all of them suffer mild to moderate symptoms, but it is highly infectious. If she passes the virus on to her parents they have a high risk of dying from it. She may be dying to see then but does she want them to die her seeing them. For goodness sakes, just face time them.
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Old 03-26-2020, 10:38 AM
  #9

We went to visit my husband‘s parents but they are 89 and 93. Both of them are in situations where they should not be leaving the home. We brought meals for them to eat and just visited for a brief time and kept a social distance. I had already socially distanced myself 2 weeks prior to the mandate in my state due to medical concerns so we were very careful when we went. So there can be some situations that are necessary to visit parents.

This does not appear to be one of them, however. Just wanted to throw it out there.
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Old 03-26-2020, 06:06 PM
  #10

My mom continues to have people over and go out. Her friend is currently in the hospital, and she still doesn’t care. My sister and I keep getting on her, and my sister just said she’s done correcting her.


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Some people just don't get it.
Old 03-26-2020, 06:43 PM
  #11

We have to take my MIL back to her home town to get a diagnostic mammogram next week. She has a lump in her breast. We plan to take a lot of precautions to keep from being exposed to the virus. My DH sent an email to his family telling them what we're doing, just to keep everyone updated. His cousin sent back an email inviting us to come to dinner. She is still working, so she is around people. Probably not a lot of people, but still...
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Parents.
Old 03-26-2020, 07:16 PM
  #12

I am 64 years old and have health workers in my home during the week. Although I don't have children, I will admit that I would not appreciate seeing my child at this time. In fact I would not open my door to her. My DSIL use to come up to help me on the weekends but didn't last week. She said something tonight and I told her I didn't want to see her until things are settled. I did ask my DB to come to put my trash out in the bin but I told him that I would have the trash on the porch, he came and I didn't know for a few days.

I don't see my parents nor would I see them at this time. I don't want to be responsible for either getting sick, sorry but I would never forgive myself for being selfish.

I am not sick, I have mobility problems.
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Old 03-27-2020, 06:56 AM
  #13

I would say something, but in a nice way I've already argued with a stranger on Facebook about this on a mutual friend's page. So I definitely would said something to an acquaintance!

My DH wants to visit his parents this weekend (in their 60s-70s), but were worried about putting them at risk ... well turns out they've been going out and about like nothing's wrong so now it's like.. well they might put us at risk! It's pretty frustrating; my parents (60s) are the same way. They keep going to the grocery store like every other day even though they have plenty of food at home
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