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I'm not good at asking for help...
Old 08-01-2022, 06:06 PM
  #1

I try to be independent and do everything I can on my own. I really don't ask friends for help. I do ask my parents and occasionally my sisters. I don't want to inconvenience anyone.

I have a large desk that I want to disassemble and get down to the curb. I really can't do it myself, and I don't want to ask my dad. He's getting older and I just worry with him lifting heavy things, although I know he could.

I lead a group at my church and just put out in our text thread a request for help. I offered dinner or ice cream to whoever could come help. I never do this! I'm anxious as I listen to the silence ....just don't want to come across as needy or demanding or requesting a lot and I definitely don't want people to feel obligated. It's not like it's all that important. Oh brother, what have I done?!

Would you ask friends for favors like this?


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Old 08-01-2022, 06:08 PM
  #2

I have found people really want to help! It fulfills them.

Let us know about the responses. I bet you get quite a few!

And yes...I'm like you! I HATE asking for help.
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Old 08-01-2022, 06:15 PM
  #3

i'm a natural helper (to my detriment?) i love to be asked for help!

i hope you get lots of takers!
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Glad you asked!
Old 08-01-2022, 06:20 PM
  #4

I agree that people enjoy helping, and it makes them feel good.

I love your offer to feed them- that makes it a party! Keep us posted- I know Iíd help!
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Old 08-01-2022, 06:32 PM
  #5

I bet you get some offers. Last year our neighbor who was moving put a request for help on FB and got several helpers. I was not on FB so I didnít even know they needed help until another neighbor told me.


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Old 08-01-2022, 07:16 PM
  #6

Thanks everyone. I do enjoy helping others and like to feel needed, so that's a good reminder!

I got one yes so far! I'm hoping I get one more. Mostly because it's a guy who is very nice but very quiet, so it would be more comfortable if there's someone else to help generate conversation.
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Good
Old 08-01-2022, 08:11 PM
  #7

I hope you get others.
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Old 08-02-2022, 04:30 AM
  #8

I'm glad you asked and yes I would too. You're not coming across as needy or demanding at all. There are only certain things around the house one can do by oneself. I'm glad someone offered. No worries if he's the only one. Nice and quiet might mean, he'll come over, move the desk and may decline ice cream or dinner because it's not that big a job to him. I'm sure conversation will flow about the furniture and how to move it, etc.

Good for you for reaching out
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Old 08-02-2022, 06:05 AM
  #9

I like helping others and do so whenever I can.

I needed help two weeks ago. I just brought my dh home from surgery. We stopped at the pharmacy for his meds and they weren’t ready. The guy said to come back after lunch. Well, after lunch is when my mom needs the most care and I can’t leave the house. I called a neighbor to pick up his meds. She was very happy to help.

That’s nice that someone offered. Don’t worry too much about conversation. Taking apart and hauling out the desk will generate plenty of opportunities to grunt, groan, and swear.
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Old 08-02-2022, 11:23 AM
  #10

I will answer requests like that when I can. I donít mind at all. Iím getting better about asking for help. I used to be absolutely stubborn about it.


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Old 08-02-2022, 02:59 PM
  #11

Yes 100%. Thatís what friends are for. I would want my friend to be comfortable to ask me for help.
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Old 08-02-2022, 03:42 PM
  #12

Well, he came and went! He was pretty quiet (typical for him) but got the job done quickly. It was a huge help and he seemed happy to do it.
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Old 08-02-2022, 04:38 PM
  #13

Yay! I'm glad. Sometimes (ha-often) I prefer quiet to meaningless chit chat, lol!
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