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MsBTexas MsBTexas is offline
 
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MsBTexas
 
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Colleagues who like to brag
Old 07-12-2019, 03:25 AM
 
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Maybe this is more of a common sense thing, and I do have some ideas, but I'm looking to see if you guys have any tips for me anyway--or any horror stories/experiences of your own you'd like to describe!


I am moving from 7th to 6th grade after a rocky year with a team that just had a true conflict of personalities that we never seemed to fully overcome. I am so glad to get to move to 6th and looking forward to the team I'm moving to (mostly)! However, there is one member on my new team who constantly brags about things she's in charge of, things she's gotten acknowledgement for from admin, etc. For example, yesterday at a summer training, she proceeded to brag that the new principal we are getting this year replied to an email to her so quickly (principal had not replied to the rest of us in the group thus far, to an email the new P sent asking for feedback for this new year coming up).
At lunch break I nearly hard rolled my eyes when she said she got the most honors classes for this coming year due to state scores being better than her previous team's. I kindly (well, as kindly as possible), pointed out that we got the email telling us which classes we'd have for next year BEFORE the state testing scores came out!


Anyway, I just wanted to see--how do you guys handle colleagues like this (besides just to ignore the behavior and move right along, which I know I can also do!)?


Thanks in advance!


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Keltikmom Keltikmom is offline
 
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Bragging
Old 07-13-2019, 07:22 AM
 
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You do the same thing you do with that annoying child in classroom: ignore, ignore, ignore. Just have zero reaction.
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Teacherbee_4 Teacherbee_4 is offline
 
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Couple things...
Old 07-13-2019, 08:25 AM
 
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My first thought was that not all might be bragging as much her just saying it and you interpreting it as bragging. As an example, the comment about the principal responding. It may have just come out wrong/sounding like bragging. I'm sure we all have said things that came out differently than intended!

The comment about the state scores makes me think she has low self-esteem. Perhaps someone has been making her feel bad about her abilities (either now or in the past), so she copes with that by bragging or saying things to make herself sound better.

I'm not sure if you are religious or not, but I came across this beautiful prayer called "The Litany of Humility". It is just beautiful. I've been saying to every day and it really does help!

You will never have the perfect team. You will never get along with all of your colleagues. There will always be someone we just don't mesh with in life. That's just the nature of human life. Try to find this person's good qualities and focus on those. Love the person for who she is regardless of this negative trait. We all have them! I know I personally worked with someone, and everything had to be about her and one upping everyone. If I something upset me, she shared something that happened to her that was "seemingly" worse than what happened to me. If I did something cool in the classroom, she did something cooler. If I had a rough day, she had a rougher day. If was going somewhere on vacation or went somewhere, she already was there and did more than I did/saw more/etc. That's just her. I still love her! She has really good qualities. I value her friendship regardless and choose to put up with her faults.
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MsBTexas MsBTexas is offline
 
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Old 07-13-2019, 12:18 PM
 
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TeacherBee- You're absolutely right in that focusing on her good qualities is probably the best path. She is definitely a decent teacher from what I can gather, but from what I have noticed, doesn't really give credit to anyone else for anything great they do no matter what. Even when colleagues and I do go along with it all and just say "Oh that's great!" and not say much besides smile and not at her claims to greatness, she still won't return the favor if a colleague also discusses an accomplishment they have as well! She just wants to tell you what better idea she has or what better thing she's done (even if after you hear it, you know it isn't actually better!) It's maddening, but I'm trying to continue taking the high road. Most of my other colleagues just try to avoid her as much as possible and gossip among themselves. However, that's tough to do also when she gets picked to lead a lot of stuff by admin because she kisses much more hiney than the rest of us can stomach doing.



Now, I will admit that I'm not the only one that grumbles about her always bragging or trying to make it appear that she's so much better than everyone else---and I could have listed 10 more examples to prove my claims. My other half at home said he thinks it's a self-esteem issue too and to just ignore it all. But then again, I'm only human, and it's tough to ignore every little thing when someone is constantly trying to come out on top of everyone else regardless of how hard everyone is working.
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Teacherbee_4 Teacherbee_4 is offline
 
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Litany of Humility
Old 07-13-2019, 12:34 PM
 
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Quote:
However, that's tough to do also when she gets picked to lead a lot of stuff by admin because she kisses much more hiney than the rest of us can stomach doing.
This is where I think the Litany of Humility can really help if you are a religious/spiritual person. It will help you be more okay with that and not bothered by it.


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