need a well worded reply - ProTeacher Community




Home Join Now Search My Favorites
Help


      The VENT

need a well worded reply

>

Reply
 
Thread Tools
signed out
 
 
Guest

signed out
 
 
Guest
need a well worded reply
Old 01-15-2010, 09:13 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #1

I am so sick and tired of the cliquish, two-faced people on the staff. They will offer an "open" invite to such events as lunches, sales parties, movies, etc., but that is not the intent because printed invitations are given to some staff members. So, even though they are trying to give the impression that anyone is welcome to attend, that is not the plan.

So, when one of these staff members makes a verbal invitation, to someone who is really not on the invite list, what is a tactful way to say, "I know this is only a face value invitation and my presence is really not wanted. I prefer not to attend your cliquish events and would appreciate that you stop being two-faced about the invitation. Additionally, since my free time is limited why on earth would I want to spend it with you, since you talk behind back and say rude things when I am not around?"

Any ideas will be appreciated.


  Reply With Quote

mamacanteach's Avatar
mamacanteach mamacanteach is online now
 
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 4,285
Senior Member

mamacanteach
 
mamacanteach's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 4,285
Senior Member

Old 01-15-2010, 09:45 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #2

Smile wide and say "Thanks for thinking of me! I'd love to but I have such-and-such with my HOT hubby/best friend/adorable child that evening. Have fun!"
mamacanteach is online now   Reply With Quote
westwitch's Avatar
westwitch westwitch is offline
 
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,244
Senior Member

westwitch
 
westwitch's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,244
Senior Member
Make 'em sweat!
Old 01-15-2010, 04:03 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #3

Try responding with, "Gee, that sounds GREAT! WOW! Maybe I'll come!" Ask all the details: where, when, who's going, who's carpooling...make it really convincing! Let them worry that you MIGHT show up! They'll be quite worried that you might actually take them up on it. Then, do whatever you planned to do in the first place. "Aww, would have LOVED to go, but something came up. So sorry!" That should take care of the "ingenuous invites".
westwitch is offline   Reply With Quote
playpower's Avatar
playpower playpower is offline
 
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 3,435
Senior Member

playpower
 
playpower's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2009
Posts: 3,435
Senior Member
next time
Old 01-15-2010, 04:51 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #4

When this happens again, do as pp mentioned and act all interested and like you will be coming. Then when you don't show up and they say something, "Gosh, I guess next time you ought to give me a printed invitation so I can abide by proper etiquette guidelines and RSVP." Be sure to have a huge smile pasted on your face. Or you could say that one of your resolutions this year was to be mindful of who you are spending your time with and the priority is your family and folks who genuinely care about you. Is this too passive aggressive? I don't know-might get your point across!
playpower is offline   Reply With Quote
Carolyn's Avatar
Carolyn Carolyn is offline
 
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 7,465
Senior Member

Carolyn
 
Carolyn's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 7,465
Senior Member
invitation
Old 01-15-2010, 04:58 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #5

Wouldn't they be shocked if you actually did say that.

I would just decline to attend.


Carolyn is offline   Reply With Quote
rhubarb's Avatar
rhubarb rhubarb is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 5,553
Senior Member

rhubarb
 
rhubarb's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 5,553
Senior Member
haha
Old 01-15-2010, 05:35 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #6

I love it!
rhubarb is offline   Reply With Quote
dramacentral's Avatar
dramacentral dramacentral is offline
 
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 736
Senior Member

dramacentral
 
dramacentral's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 736
Senior Member

Old 01-15-2010, 07:40 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #7

At my school, no one would have made the effort to even extend the verbal invitation. My coworkers don't keep up appearances of including everyone. Maybe it's more honest that way.

At the beginning of this school year, a colleague organized a happy hour-type event and very pointedly invited every single person on staff, including many people who never would have normally been told. Many of us went. When I got there, I ran into the girl who shared my classroom last year and she gushed, "Wow, you FINALLY came to one of these things!" That was the first one I'd ever been told about. It made me sad - firstly because it was such clear evidence that I'd been excluded in the past, and secondly because she seemed to think that I was just turning my nose up and choosing not to socialize when in fact that was not the case.
dramacentral is offline   Reply With Quote
Bertie's Avatar
Bertie Bertie is offline
 
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 1,797
Senior Member

Bertie
 
Bertie's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 1,797
Senior Member
go
Old 01-16-2010, 11:38 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #8

I'd go to it. Isn't it possible that it could be fun?
Bertie is offline   Reply With Quote

Join the conversation! Post as a guest or become a member today. New members welcome!

Reply

 

>
The VENT
Thread Tools




Sign Up Now

Sign Up FREE | ProTeacher Help | BusyBoard

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 02:29 PM.

Copyright © 2019 ProTeacher®
For individual use only. Do not copy, reproduce or transmit.
source: www.proteacher.net