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An email I wish I could send....
Old 02-03-2019, 11:31 AM
 
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I got an parent email today stating concern about not being ready for kindergarten. I wish I could respond like this...

Dear Parent,

I understand your urgency in helping your child get ready for kindergarten next year. I really do. But the truth is, you have not been working with him at home in the least little bit. Plus, you let this child decide when he wants to skip school and stay home. He's missed, on average, 1 day a week starting in October. You say it's because he's the "middle child" and needs more attention from you. You let him use that as an excuse every time. But the thing is, he is missing out on valuable instruction time when he's home with you. In the first 2 years of preschool (he's one of the lucky 3-year children!), he was coming part time. The first year being 2 days a week (that's 60% of instruction he has missed in that year), and the second year being 3 days a week (that's 40% of instruction time missed!). Now you want me to change everything around so your child can get more instruction time. You claim he doesn't know many letters or how to write his name. I can tell you, your child gets one on one instruction with me or my assistant every single day. He recognizes every capital letter for me. He writes is name for me several times a week. Plus he has a language delay due to hearing problems. He is making progress every day. You claim he's getting an IEP, but we have yet to see it. Until you decide to work more with him at home, there's not much more I can do.

Yours truly,
adore2teach


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It is very frustrating
Old 02-03-2019, 03:09 PM
 
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when a parent lets their kid be absent and then complains that they are behind. Also, I do not understand how so many parents are incapable of teaching their own kids things like the abc's and numbers.
At the same time, I came from a family that valued education and taught us so much that I really did not learn much academically from school for the 1st 3 yrs. We learned to rd young and so did our kids. Just from seeing reading as a fun time, being encouraged to be curious, playing games, and traveling a lot.
It seems like schools are pushing academics at a really young age now though. Kids who do not have decent parents or are maybe just young for their age are expected to do more and more.
I wish we had more good parents who spent a lot of time teaching their kids the basics like empathy, sticking to a task, listening, following directions, taking turns etc. It is sad to see so many kids much older who have never learned these foundational skills.
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My Questions Is...
Old 02-03-2019, 04:10 PM
 
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why can't you write what you wrote in your post?

It is the truth and the parent needs to hear it.

If you can't write it to the parent in an email or on the child's report card, then you can sure say it at a conference.

Go for it...
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How about this
Old 02-03-2019, 04:44 PM
 
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Dear Parent:

You’re right. Consider holding your child back a year while you intensify schooling at home.
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Old 02-03-2019, 07:13 PM
 
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I'm not understanding the problem. An incoming Kinder who knows all uppercase letters and can write his name doesn't sound behind to me at all. I have many incoming Ks who only know a handful of uppercase and no lowercase letters. It's the Kindergarten teacher's job to teach that.


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Old 02-03-2019, 11:15 PM
 
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Our preschool does what kindergarten used to do. Kindergarten teaches the ones who are ready how to read. Much different from when I started.
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Old 02-04-2019, 05:58 AM
 
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Quote:
Our preschool does what kindergarten used to do. Kindergarten teaches the ones who are ready how to read. Much different from when I started.
I have so many issues with that. The kid is fine--it's the expectations that are wrong.
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Old 02-04-2019, 07:31 AM
 
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Quote:
Emmy: Our preschool does what kindergarten used to do. Kindergarten teaches the ones who are ready how to read. Much different from when I started.

Zia: I have so many issues with that. The kid is fine--it's the expectations that are wrong.
I wish we had a "like" button!
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Positive
Old 02-04-2019, 06:45 PM
 
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My principal will only allow us to send positive email interactions with our parents. She has to okay everything we send out, and she will not approve this. I agree, there is more pressure on preschool these days to do what kindergarten used to do when I was little. We are in a private school, so the pressure is even more evident and the expectations are higher. I hate that I have to force more and more down my kids' throats every year. They aren't ready and it just creates frustration from them and their parents. I'm so sad that my littles can't just be little anymore.
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Old 02-05-2019, 06:25 AM
 
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Zia ia is right-but so is this teacher.

I taught K and Pre-k and now third and that child who misses a ton of school in Pre-k also misses a ton of K, then a ton of 1st and 2nd and then he gets to grade 3 we are concerned because, after missing 25% or more of instruct each year he has now missed an entire year of school and...duh is not at least a year behind. The kid whose parent dont work with him in Pre-k also keep up this trend.

Well now its sh** storm of how are we gonna fix this but really its how am I going to wave my magic wand and erase the missing year from your child's education. And there is all this talk about him needing an IEP. Well guess what? Chronic absenteeism is a disqualifying factor for an IEP. We cant give your child an IEP because the reason for his lack of progress is a lack of instruction due to absence and not a learning disability-or even if their was a disability we would still not be able to qualify him, because we cant be sure that the issue is a learning disability and not just lack or instruction.

Please, along with telling her that he doesnt need to know EVERYTHING to enter kinder and be successful please tell her that he has made less progress because of his absences and that if they continue they will compound to a real problem one day.


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Old 02-05-2019, 12:42 PM
 
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I think Pre-K should be optional and kids who don't attend should still be able to handle Kinder. It hurts me so deeply what early childhood education is coming to.



My kids were enrolled in Pre-K, but if it was a super day to go to the zoo (or wherever), we skipped PreK.
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Old 02-06-2019, 09:08 AM
 
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Zia - I totally agree with you about skipping Pre-K every once in a while to do something fun or go on a field trip. I bet you worked with your kid/kids at home and didn't blame the teacher for their progress. This parent is laying blame on my doorstep because of this child's progress. I can't teach a child if he or she is not in my classroom, plain and simple. Unfortunately, kindergarten is becoming more demanding on what they need to know before entering. It's so hard to let them be little kids anymore.
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Old 02-06-2019, 04:46 PM
 
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Quote:
Unfortunately, kindergarten is becoming more demanding on what they need to know before entering. It's so hard to let them be little kids anymore.
Believe me, I know. I teach K! I work very hard to meet standards in a developmentally appropriate way.


Quote:
This parent is laying blame on my doorstep because of this child's progress.
That definitely sucks and I think you can tell the parent the absenteeism isn't helping. You have evidence of it; it's irrefutable. Awkward, but it needs to be said.

Quote:
I can't teach a child if he or she is not in my classroom, plain and simple.
That is 100% true. But I still firmly believe a student entering K knowing all uppercase and the letters in his/her name isn't behind. You've done a fine job and mom and future K teacher need to chill!
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