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Birthday lunch
Old 01-04-2020, 01:36 AM
  #1

My cousin who live 3 hours away is getting married for the 4th time on 1/11. On the beach, in the rain. It will be very casual. The wedding will start at 1:00 so that they can be done in time to go to the bar and watch the 49ers playoff game. I said Gabriel and I would go. Not a big fan of cousin for numerous reasons. Day before she is celebrating her birthday with lunch at a Chinese restaurant near me. Her grown kids, brother, father, stepmom, maybe her half sister and who knows who else will all be there. Not sure about the 13 year old cousin as he would have school. My mom thinks since it is family, I should take Gabriel (3.5) out of school early to go to lunch. He would miss his cooking class, play time, and story time. We have met my Uncle for dinner and the last time we did, the first words out of his mouth to Gabriel (before acknowledging anyone) were, “Are you going to behave.” Amazingly he usually does. I see most of these people once a year and that is it. Gabriel loves the rice and used to love the soup. I am kind of thinking what is the point of bringing him. I am sure the majority of people will be drinking on top of it (the last time we were there was to celebrate my Aunt’s life and almost everyone had 2+ drinks).

What do you say, bring him because it is family or let him have fun at school?


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Old 01-04-2020, 04:18 AM
  #2

Since he’s going to the wedding the next day, I’d leave him in school. Kids like and need routine. Unless she specifically said she wanted him there I’d let him enjoy his school activities.
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Old 01-04-2020, 05:18 AM
  #3

Leave him at school. My brother got married in April (he lives 12 hours from us). My boys (4 & 6) were ring bearers and only kids invited to wedding. For the rehearsal dinner the night before, I had my brother find a babysitter for my boys. 1) I didn’t want them to have to be “quiet” for extended times two days in a row. 2) I wanted to be able to talk to adults and not worry about them.
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Old 01-04-2020, 06:28 AM
  #4

I would keep him at school. No question.
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Old 01-04-2020, 06:39 AM
  #5

I would also keep him at school in his normal routine.


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Old 01-04-2020, 08:01 AM
  #6

Where would he rather be? No question. I'd leave him at school. He'll be bored at a luncheon and it's not necessary. If you only see them once a year, I can't imagine he even remembers them.

They'll see him at the wedding.

Why are you going if you're not a big fan of them? I'm assuming to keep the peace in the family. I sure wouldn't change my child's schedule for someone I don't care for.
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Old 01-04-2020, 08:10 AM
  #7

Leave him in school. He will be bored. Why are you going? I'd decline since you're going to the wedding. That's plenty since you are obviously not close.
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Old 01-04-2020, 08:14 AM
  #8

I just re-read your post. I would leave Gabriel in school, go to lunch, and skip the wedding. Give her a gift then if you are planning on doing that. The wedding is 3 hours away. Why drive 6 hours total if you are not a big fan. See her at lunch, wish her well, and be done with it. Then you have your weekend free to do what you want to do.
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Old 01-04-2020, 08:14 AM
  #9

As all previous posters have said, let Gabriel stay at school. Kids need their routine and structure. The relatives will see him the next day.
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Thank you
Old 01-04-2020, 09:42 AM
  #10

Just needed to hear it from others. He would definitely be happier at school. I am going to the wedding because it is important to my mom. My mom grew up close to her family. Even though she was in Northern California she saw her cousins in Los Angeles several times a year. She saw her cousins in Chicago 1-2 times a year. They were all in the same age range. My generation is different. Bride is about 13 years older than I am. She was already an adult and a partier when I was a kid. He will have fun at the wedding-on the beach in the rain. I just need to bring 15 towels and 5 changes of clothes.


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Wedding
Old 01-04-2020, 10:21 AM
  #11

Leave Gabriel to enjoy his routine at school. Go have lunch and leave when you have had enough family.

So are you taking Gabriel to the wedding? Does he have cute little rain coat? or maybe it is to hot for one there. I can't imagine inviting people to a 4th wedding or expecting a gift...
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Old 01-04-2020, 11:02 AM
  #12

My personal opinion is that he would probably be happier at school that day. He is going to the wedding so I would let that be the extent of it.

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Old 01-04-2020, 03:36 PM
  #13

Not to beat a horse to death but I would leave him in school to enjoy his day.
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