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Pity Party (Long. . .)
Old 07-20-2012, 08:56 AM
 
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So I'm feeling very low and don't have anywhere else to really turn and figured I'd put it down here on PT. If for no other reason but to get this off my chest and have some self therapy. . .

Growing up I was always this skinny little kid. For most of my life I wore a 28 inch waist for jeans. It wasn't until college when I actually gained a little weight and went in to a 32 inch jeans. My stomach has always been flat and can typically see my rib cage.

Since getting married, I have gained so much weight! I'm now getting close to being 190 pounds (about 50-60 pounds overweight for my height). I'm having chest pains, feeling lethargic and on cholesterol meds. My sex life is non-existent.

There was a while there when I was going to the gym and working with a trainer. I was feeling better and starting to see progress, but the expense of it all was too much. My wife and I thought we could maintain what we had going and encourage eachother. That's a joke and a half! We actually hurt one another as we enable each other to cheat on diets and skip work outs. Last night my wife pointed out how bad I'm getting and it really got me irritated. It's not like she's doing all that much either and I eat what she brings in to the house. I have no self control when the junk food is around and I always find excuses to not exercise and to eat whatever I want.

Lately I'm feeling even worse than ever. I have no energy & no motivation. Just trying to help my 5 year old learn to ride a bike I was getting winded. I know right now I should be doing some sit ups/crunches, push ups or something, but I really can't get the energy to do so. My body is falling apart with stomach issues, warts on my foot, a huge gut, chest pains, growth on the my thyroid, and out of control cholesterol. The last thing I want to do is die before my time. I have 3 kids I want to see grow up and I would love to be a grandfather one day; but, I really fear I won't make it!

I know this is long and depressing and if you made it this far, thank you for reading. Guess I need to research some beginning exercises to get myself started on a routine that won't put me in a heart attack on day 1!


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Sorry!
Old 07-20-2012, 09:04 AM
 
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You are feeling so low. The only thing I have found that works with dieting is just flat out making up my mind that I will NOT eat bad foods. Period. I have to be an all or nothing girl. A little will lead to more.

Someone on here told me about the Sparkpeople website and I have been meal planning and getting healthy recipes off of there. It is like WW online but free. I have found so many yummy low cal low fat recipes on there that the whole family likes! You and your wife should check it out and sit down and meal plan week by week. Then you can grocery shop based on your meals. What I have found is simply do NOT bring the bad stuff temptations into the house. Then you can't eat them.

As far as the nonexistent sex life, is that because you are feeling bad about yourself? Your spouse loves you for you, not your smokin hot bod. I would set up a romantic date night and get that lovin action back on track!! It will help with your depressed feelings!

As far as fitness, start a slow easy workout. NOT what I did when the 22 yo hot trainer kicked my butt to where it was sore for 4 days afterwards.

Good luck! You can do it!
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Old 07-20-2012, 09:06 AM
 
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Yes, most people in their 20s are slim, unless the weight problem is hereditary. As hard as it is, you have to have the will power. I know , easier said than done.
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(((hugs))))
Old 07-20-2012, 09:07 AM
 
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Hang in there! You can do it! One thing that helped me was to try to incorporate more plant based meals. I am only doing two a week right now and I already see a huge difference!
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Old 07-20-2012, 09:08 AM
 
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DH and I do the same things to each other. A few times in our marriage we have been on the same "page" and gotten in shape, but not so much in the last 10 years.

Quote:
My sex life is non-existent.
I would start here. This problem is not weight related. You may not feel like you are the man you once were, but your wife isn't looking at that. She will respond to you, but you may need to get creative. Both of you will feel better as a result.


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TeachNut
Old 07-20-2012, 09:09 AM
 
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I'm sorry you are feeling so down right now. I know most of the people on here will say that they have been in your shoes at one time or another. I know working with a trainer is super motivating but also very costly. What if you joined a gym and went to the classes they offer? That is what I do because you still have someone pushing you much harder than you would push yourself and they are telling you exactly what to do to get results; which is what I need. I also like the atmosphere of the classes because they are full of other people just like me trying to get fit. It is very encouraging. Eating can be tough because we all love food. I do best when I don't try and completely deprive myself of any one thing. That is a disaster waiting to happen. I have always had success with weight watchers because no food is off limits and you are taught portion control and how to make better choices. It is not a diet that you can not maintain but a lifestyle change. Hope this helps. Good luck!!!
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I Understand
Old 07-20-2012, 09:13 AM
 
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I completely understand! I've been working on this issue myself and have a long way to go. It has taken me most of the summer to lose 10 lbs! Weight Watchers online is good for food accountability... but I struggle with exercise motivation too. I know I will feel better if I DO it, but I dont like it so I procrastinate. I wish I had answers for you, but know you have plenty of company on here!
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Old 07-20-2012, 09:20 AM
 
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I'm so sorry to hear that you are so down on yourself. Please have your wife read this post so she knows how you're feeling and how much you need her support. As well as getting professional help, I would start by setting goals that you can easily reach to start building your confidence. Keep a journal of your successes and read it when you are feeling down. I don't know if I've been of any help but please push yourself to start yourself on the road to recovery. Do it for yourself and your family. Sending you positive thoughts!
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Old 07-20-2012, 09:32 AM
 
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Thank you for sharing. Hope you get the answers you are looking for. I can so relate. Keep us updated.

Last edited by OK4NOW; 07-20-2012 at 10:21 AM..
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Sorry!
Old 07-20-2012, 09:32 AM
 
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I have been there too. I am not in love with my weight right now either. Trying to kick myself in the butt. What works best for me is Weight Watchers. It is such a great program and is basically eating healthy. It is a lifestyle change and is great having the workers and counselors all being people that have BTDT.


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Get moving
Old 07-20-2012, 09:36 AM
 
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It is hard to be motivated to exercise when you have a job and kids and responsibliity. You need to find a way to exercise that you enjoy. You can take your kids for walks. I always did that with mine when they were little. I used videos too like Ti Bo with Billy Blanks they are cheap and your kids can join you. Swimming is an option now that it's summer. Find a gym that is convient to home and or work. See if they have free trials and do that . If you do join a gym then keep your gym bag in the car at all times packed and ready to go.

Buy only healthful foods and no junk. Pack healthful things for lunch at school that way you have no chance to cheat.

My new love is Zumba. I started slow like one half hour a week and now I do 1 hour at most 5 days a week mostly 2 to 3 because of school functions. There are men in the class and they seem to like it. That really burns the calories big time.

Good luck. You know what you have to do. The first step is to admit it.
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My doctor recommended
Old 07-20-2012, 09:53 AM
 
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the book Dr. Gundry's Diet Evolution because my husband needed to lose weight. (He's put on weight due to a back injury. Like you, he was always super skinny when he was young.) I am following it, too, to support him. The interesting part is that his book is about retraining your cells, so he actually advocates NOT exercising. My husband has lost 25 pounds so far without any exercise.

The first two weeks are hard, but we both feel so much better! I didn't need to lose weight, but I was happy to gain more energy. I hope you feel better!
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Sparkpeople is really helping me.
Old 07-20-2012, 10:13 AM
 
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I like that it gives you a chart at the end of the day to tell you how you did. Then you can make adjustments to the types of foods you're eating so you can eat a really balanced diet. That way, you are crafting your diet to be healthy--not just to lose weight. Put the weight loss on the back burner for a while, and just try to eat more healthy. Then the weight loss will come after you have developed healthy habits. After you've been eating healthy for a while, you will be more motivated to start exercising. It sounds very simplistic, but it really works.
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Motivation
Old 07-20-2012, 10:14 AM
 
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I would get your kids involved. Go swimming with them, go on a walk, or a bike ride. Go on an easy hike with them. If you have a Wii Fit, play the sport games with them, it isn't much, but it is something to get you moving. That is the most important thing is to get moving. If you can resist the junk food at an amusement park, take the kids to an amusement park (bring your own food, if they allow it).

Isn't sex supposed to be a really good workout?

Don't deny yourself-eat in moderation. Buy the 100 calorie packs of the junk or the mini candy bars. Measure everything so that you are only eating 1-2 servings of the food.

The water is a great way to start because you rarely feel anything while you are in the water, but you are working just the same. You can walk in the water, do a class, or swim laps.

I lost 60 pounds by portion control, walking, and swimming (unfortunately due to medical I have gained it back).
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Old 07-20-2012, 10:23 AM
 
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First of all TeachNut, I feel your pain. I am doing better now since my divorce, but I definitely gained weight after I got married. I would have been content just eating dessert for a meal or a real meal, but my ex wanted both. I ballooned after cooking for him. Then I started walking and I lost weight. After I was successful losing some then I started eating healthier and then my ex started doing more of the cooking (fattening, very unhealthy food.) I joined a gym, but they closed. I have some of my own equipment, but I don't use it enough.

I am obviously not suggesting a divorce, but I have to say I do quite a bit better being the only one who does the food shopping. If you don't have junk food on hand, you won't be eating it. I'm afraid for you to succeed, you need to get your wife onboard. Maybe you two could have a friendly competition to see who could lose more (and the winner gets something they want.)

Do you ever watch Dr. Oz? He has lots of ideas for how to lose weight. I know a couple that were both overweight and became diabetic. The wife decided to have a stomach surgery and started losing weight and got the diabetes under control so now 6 months later, her husband had the same surgery. I will see them in a few weeks and I can't wait because he really had a big stomach and I can't wait to see the results. I don't know exactly what they had done, but it wasn't the most invasive surgery.

So my suggestions are to:
1. talk to your wife
2. no more junk food
3.start walking first thing in the morning and after dinner
4. watch Dr. Oz
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Old 07-20-2012, 10:39 AM
 
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Ugghh...it's tough when you're feeling that way.

Have you ever seen the 17 Day diet book? You CAN commit to anything for 17 days.....try it out..at least you will have healthy foods going in (and only a commitment to do 17 minutes of exercise daily) which may help you feel better ...then you can start to think about everything else. I have found I need to take care of me first then I can think about everything else.

I hope you feel better about yourself soon.....
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Old 07-20-2012, 10:44 AM
 
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I'm sorry you're feeling down, and I can see where your wife's comment last night was not helpful.

If she buys junk food and won't change those buying habits, can you take over the grocery shopping? If you don't buy it, it won't tempt you. Plus, you're helping instill healthy eating habits in your kids.

I agree with Irish about exercising with your kids (which, again, helps instill healthy habits in them). Even though you had a hard time yesterday keeping up with him learning to ride his bike, it will get easier with time and diligence. Do you have a dog that would love a daily walk?

I hope you and your wife can have a heart-to-heart and agree on some lifestyle changes for healthy living for your whole family. Good luck!
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Old 07-20-2012, 10:52 AM
 
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Wow, thank you all for your kind words and support!

Please don't get me wrong, my wife isn't the only issue with my weight! She too wants to get healthy and lose weight, it's just we both don't do well holding eachother accountable and we tend to sabotage each other ~ I'm just as guilty as doing it to her!!

I'm going to check in to the books and website some of you suggested and I will see what I can do about getting back in shape and working towards being healthy.

You all are great for reading and responding to my long rant ~ thank you for all the support.
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Weight loss is so tough and personal
Old 07-20-2012, 10:55 AM
 
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You have to find what works for you. In my early twenties I lost a tremendous amount of weight in one year. I starved myself. I only ate one small meal each day. It worked for me at the time, but I have no hope or desire of doing that now. For the last year and several months I have just been counting calories. It's so easy to do because I use a program called Lose It. I have access to it on any computer, my phone, and my iPad. There are several other programs too. I think My Fitness Pal is the name of another that I've been thinking of switching to. They're free. Start out by just logging your information and getting your calorie allotment. Then just eat and log the calories even if you have no immediate intent to limit your intake. Just seeing it add up and how certain foods really pack the calories is a huge eye opener. Eventually you might find yourself making choices and hopefully you'll feel like I'd do and feel as if you're not dieting, just modifying. Good luck. I know how hard and frustrating it can be.
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Old 07-20-2012, 11:04 AM
 
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Sorry that you feeling like this. It is really no fun! Have you thought about maybe doing the 90 day challenge with body by vi? You drink 2 shakes a day and then eat a normal, but healthy meal. I have opted to start this challenge when school starts back since I will have more of a routine than I have in the summer. You could have a shake for breakfast and lunch. It is quite expensive, but it would be worth it in the end. The price I believe is around 100.00 per month, but you would not have to buy any other food for breakfast and lunch other than maybe the fruit you put in your shake. Just a thought and it doesn't take a ton of effort. Most people lose around 40-50 pounds within 3 months.
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aw!
Old 07-20-2012, 11:06 AM
 
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Have you and your wife considered a company that prepares the food for you? I know I really want to do that but having teens and a dh who doesn't means I still have to cook and have temptig things around. Perhaps if you could get her to agree so you both only have to make for your dd this would work? And have one day a week for a cheat meal?

Also.what about bicycling with the dd for exercise? I know dh and I hate going to the gym but we likebeing out in the neighborhood.

I also think you should go for a physical and get a doctors input.

Dh and I are in the same boat as you. I think many of us are. in the mean time drink lots of water before meals and before smacking, take a walk after dinner every day, stop drinking pop, use a sandwich plate for meals instead of a big one and no.second helpings! Also make sure you are getting enough sleep.

Hugs!
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The thing that jumped out at me was...
Old 07-20-2012, 11:11 AM
 
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"growth on my thyroid!"

The thyroid controls so much of our body's functions. Don't even start any diet/exercise research until you see a specialist about this. You might have already been to the doctor, but you really need to keep working to find the right doctor to resolve this before anything else will work.

My DD is a type 1 diabetic and her thyroid will go wacky every once in a while. She will gain weight for no reason. She will eat and exercise the same and one time she will be a size 8-10 and in a few months she will be a size 0-2. Totally out of her control. Medication helps.

Please start with a full medical check up and go from there.

BTW-eating the diabetic diet is a great way to be healthy. When my DD lived at home, I ate what she ate, when she ate (she was kid) It was the healthiest I had ever been.
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Old 07-20-2012, 11:27 AM
 
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I'm so sorry you feel like this! I've struggled with my weight all my life and I was not a junk food addict, in fact I don't care for candy and I'm not big into processed foods. That being said, it's hard being an adult and dealing with the stressors in life and trying to maintain a healthy weight and lifestyle. I can see how it's easy to fall back on bad habits and I think DH and I do the same thing. I think you've been given some great ideas already from other posters but I just wanted to say I understand where you're coming from and I really hope you can find a routine of exercise and healthy eating that you can maintain and live with without feeling deprived. Please keep us updated!
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Old 07-20-2012, 11:35 AM
 
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I'm sorry you are feeling so down. I totally understand. I also am 30 lbs overweight and used to be 115 lbs when I married. I liked my body then and wore skin tight jeans, tummy shirts and was proud of the way I looked. I cringe when I look in the mirror now.
I have some advice that is a little different. Two things.
1. You CAN lose weight w/o exercising. I'm not saying it's ideal, you may have flab due to not tightening muscles but you can lose weight if you don't exercise. I'm telling you this because I hate to exercize and never did but still lost 34 lbs on Jenny Craig w/o ever exercising. Of course I know I should have but I still lost weight.
2. Read a motivational book like I think it's called The Promise..there are so many of them. They teach you how to think positively in order to get what you want. Negativity brings negative results and positivite thoughts bring good things. My ds17 is a varsity bb player and he is constantly reading these books to help him stay positive and improve his game. He swears by them. Just try it.

Will power is my problem too. I know how gross i feel now and I remember how great I felt when I lost weight. I have to keep that in my head and resist that Carvel cake (my favorite). I hope you try one of those books. If you need titles, I'll ask my ds which he recommends the most. He seriously swears by them. Good luck
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aww- been there!
Old 07-20-2012, 11:49 AM
 
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I am so sorry you are feeling badly about yourself. I think most of us have been where you are. Youth has a way of keeping us in shape, despite ourselves. Then, at a certain age, we really need to work on it. I hear what you are saying about your spouse- my DH and I need to get on the same page at the same time, or it's really hard to get in shape. Here's what worked wonders for me, and for him:

Couch to 5k- there is a board here, and it's for couch potatoes, in 9 weeks, to be able to run a 5k. I was a nonrunner (unless there was an icecream truck going by!) before last May. Now I get out and run every other day for 30 minutes, and I love it.

The 17 Day Diet. I got the book, actually read it, and followed it. That, along with C25K, got me in the best shape I've been in years. I lost 25 lbs. (gained back 10 over the winter, but I know what I need to do to lose it again) and my DH lost about the same.

All that being said, when my DH isn't eating healthy, and junk food is in the house, I have a really hard time not joining in. Maybe you can go shopping together and get healthy treats (I LOVE cherries, and will treat myself when I am eating healthy.) And plan out healthy meals together. If you get her on board, it will be so much easier for both of you. Tell her you need her to help you, and that you want to be around for your grandchildren. You can do it- we'll help you! Do your research, talk to your wife, and start your plan on Monday. I'll start again too (I just had a fluffernutter sandwich, so I need to start my healthy eating plan again, too!) (((Teachnut)))
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Old 07-20-2012, 12:46 PM
 
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We're here to support you and your wife. I'm also in the same boat, as is me husband and our two kids. We all know we need to eat healthier and have started to do so. We also know it's not easy, and getting out to walk or play with your kids is tough when it's 100 degrees outside.

(I have to loose 50 lbs just to get down to "fat" from "obese.")
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Old 07-20-2012, 03:57 PM
 
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I hope you are under medical care for the chest pains, stomach issues, cholesterol, and thyroid growth. If you're not, definitely go to the doctor first before starting any rigorous exercise.

I really think the best thing to do is pick a few small habits to change. Also go shopping and make sure the food you keep in the house isn't the kind of stuff that sabotages you. I know how easy it is to fall into old habits and sabotage one another, however unintentionally. Also make small changes to your physical habits. Start by parking as far away as possible from stores and walking in. Take the stairs instead of the elevator/escalator, walk from store to store instead of driving. It sounds cliche, but it's totally true and it works to help increase your ability to do those things. Do stretches in the morning, those help as well. Weight lifting is a great exercise that strengthens bones and muscles and uses calories.

You CAN do this! Hopefully your wife will be on board, but even if she falls back into old habits, know that you are strong enough to keep on. Dh and I have both gone through times when we were actively trying to lose weight. I lost 60 lb after my third child, in spite of his (unintentional) attempts to sabotage me. It's not easy, but it can be done. And I agree with pp that sex doesn't have to wait until you are in the shape you want to be. But it's hard to engage in sex when you're harboring really negative feelings about yourself.
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Old 07-20-2012, 04:19 PM
 
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Teachnut I am right there with you on lots of things in your post. This has been the laziest, sluggiest summer I've ever had. I am getting quite flabby...spending most days on the couch with my face in my laptop. And it has a terrible effect on my mood.

The 17 Day diet worked for me last spring. I lost 12 pounds and felt so good. I'm going back on it next week. My problem will be forcing myself to exercise.

Good luck and remember many of us are dealing with the same issues.
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Old 07-20-2012, 04:38 PM
 
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Quote:
One thing that helped me was to try to incorporate more plant based meals.
Yes! Definitely, especially since you're worried about cholesterol. Dietary cholesterol ONLY comes from animal products; plant-based foods have none. So increasing your plant-based foods will pretty much automatically decrease your cholesterol intake, which in turn is likely (not guaranteed, but likely) to improve your blood cholesterol levels. I personally know people who have turned around serious cardiac disease--like, quadruple-bypass patients--by doing nothing except going vegan. But even if you're not ready to go 100% vegan, adding in some meatless meals occasionally will probably help a lot.

And I'm going to extend that thinking to exercise, too: Anything you do is better than doing nothing. I think a lot of people are intimidated by exercise because they feel like they need to run marathons or something, but you don't. Going for a walk--even if it's a short walk, and even if you go slowly--is infinitely better than NOT going for a walk. It doesn't have to be a big deal, or a huge time commitment; just do something.

Good luck--you CAN do this!
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Old 07-20-2012, 06:08 PM
 
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Think about having your testosterone checked!
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