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twin2 twin2 is offline
 
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Not going to eat like pigs
Old 11-22-2019, 03:58 AM
  #1

I need to remember that my husband often repeats what I say, especially if he thinks he is helping a situation. He actually told my daughter, "we are not going to eat like pigs this year".

This year our lab is having surgery on Monday prior to Thanksgiving and will need a lot of our attention for several weeks. The surgery has been rescheduled two or three times and I didn't even know about the surgery when I said I would do Thanksgiving here. I had asked each of my adult children where they wanted to be this year, tried to give them an out because my husband an I wanted some quiet time at home that day. I know that's terrible, but our little secret. Two of the three asked said they wanted to be here. The other will be taking a turn going to her in-laws home.

I decided we will have a full dinner, but I'm taking some short cuts because I will be taking care of my dog such a short time after surgery. I told them a week ago that I will only make a few things home-made, but we will still have the same basic foods we always have. They are fine with that.

The conversation with my husband about this included me telling him I need to make x number of packages of macaroni and cheese and stuffing so there will be plenty. It's bad enough I'm not making these home-made but I can at least have plenty prepared. My husband seems to forget how few servings are actually in a box of macaroni and cheese these days, so I reminded him we have some big eaters. My daughter, her husband and children are the big eaters. They are usually first in line and forget there are lots of people behind them that have to eat. I have had to suggest portion sizes for the first round so there's enough for everyone and say first come first serve on second helpings. They are also notorious for piling food on the kids plates then throwing it away when the kids are too full to eat it all. I'm fine with them eating as much as they want on Thanksgiving but I want them to be careful not to overload the kids' plates. That's it. That's all I said to my husband about the matter.

Last night our daughter came over to get her kids and my husband actually said what he did. I was in shock. I had already left the room, so I stayed in the other room until I knew they weren't arguing. Wow...My husband. I can't believe even he would say that.


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Old 11-22-2019, 06:04 AM
  #2

Why not ask your kids to be responsible for more of the food? They could bring more of the side dishes. I sympathize with you about your DH. My husband seems to have a similar knack for blurting stuff out.
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Old 11-22-2019, 07:44 AM
  #3

IDK, I really donít think that is a bad conversation to have with them. Remind them that you have a lot on your plate right now ( no pun intended <!--giggle--) with caring for your dog and that we all need to be mindful of not wasting food.

Disclaimer: I have an extremely small familyó just my sister, her SO, an elderly friend and DH and me so some of those issues donít arise for me.)
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Old 11-22-2019, 09:06 AM
  #4

It might be a conversation for another time. This year I'm going to insist my son and his son serve themselves first while I serve my husband, then my daughter's family can go next. Unless they change their minds my parents won't be there. I almost wish the others would be there so my daughter and her husband can see first hand what the near empty serving dishes look like. Then again the other eat more modest serving sizes.
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solution
Old 11-22-2019, 09:06 AM
  #5

Quote:
Why not ask your kids to be responsible for more of the food? They could bring more of the side dishes.
This seems to be the most logical solution.


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Old 11-22-2019, 09:49 AM
  #6

Why don't the people who eat a lot go last? Surely they're aware that they aren't the only ones who need to eat.
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Old 11-23-2019, 04:11 AM
  #7

We always invite the ones with children get their food first, and from that the ones with kids try to be polite and let the other go first, which always ends up my daughter's family. Her kids are now 12 and 10, but my son's kid is 7, so I'm going to tell him to get their food first. They will be the only kids here this Thanksgiving. My father in law doesn't want to come because I invited my parents. He might change his mind because my parents have other plans. None of our siblings or their families will be here either, so really it is kind of a small gathering.

Any of the family would bring whatever I ask, but this time I haven't asked. Since the plans were set, I didn't want to suddenly say bring something. None of them seem to care about the instant mac and cheese and stuffing.

We all usually bring food to my mother's at Christmas. We will get together here at New Year's when our youngest son brings his family here from Tokyo. We will ask everyone to bring a dish to that.
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