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eliza4one eliza4one is offline
 
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CO couple dies in fire
Old 10-25-2020, 09:26 AM
  #1

Would you be able to do this? I'm 99% sure I would make the same decision.

My wedding song was John Denver's "Annie's Song" ("Let me die in your arms..."). That line has always resonated with me!!

Colorado couple dies in fire.

Heartbreaking, but I can see why they made that decision.



Last edited by eliza4one; 10-25-2020 at 09:46 AM..
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Old 10-25-2020, 09:35 AM
  #2

As a burn victim/survivor... it's a horrible way to go. Dying of smoke inhalation is the best you can hope for, and that must be terrible. I hope they lost consciousness quickly.

(Not to be morbid or gruesome, but the actual pain of having fire burn your skin off is simply indescribable. And my burns were "only" about 20% of my body....)
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So Sad
Old 10-25-2020, 09:36 AM
  #3

At that age I can understand what they did in a way but if I were their children it would be tragic to lose both parents and their childhood home all at once.

The story reminds me of the film The Notebook because the couple dies together at the end.

May the Colorado couple rest in peace.
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Old 10-25-2020, 09:39 AM
  #4

No, I wouldn't have done that. I would have evacuated when told. I wouldn't choose to die huddled in my basement with flames around me.

I don't think this is sweet. I appreciate their love for their property and each other. I have faith that their love continues into death although, quite obviously, they couldn't take the dream home and property with them.

I find this just bitter, not bittersweet.
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Old 10-25-2020, 09:39 AM
  #5

Quote:
Dying of smoke inhalation is the best you can hope for,
Yes, I imagined (hoped?) that is what happened.

I'm sorry you've lived through being burned by fire! I cannot imagine what that would feel like! Thank you for sharing your perspective!!


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Old 10-25-2020, 09:43 AM
  #6

I saw that on the news yesterday, and honestly, it made me mad when I heard that they had been offered and refused chances to evacuate. They could both be alive and together right now. They put rescuers in danger.
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Very sad
Old 10-25-2020, 09:44 AM
  #7

I agree the children must be heartbroken.
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Old 10-25-2020, 09:54 AM
  #8

Good points about the rescuers, and their kids.

I think they didn't fully understand the ramifications of staying there. Like people who refuse to evacuate when there are strong hurricane orders, and end up stuck on the roof of their house (or worse). Foolish and tragic.

Thank you for your kind words, Eliza4one. Last week was the 24th "anniversary" of my fire, so it's been on my mind recently. It's not something that affects me on a daily basis, but anything in the news about fires or fire victims does bring up strong emotions.
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Old 10-25-2020, 10:01 AM
  #9

I imagine there was a moment when they were huddled in that basement, scared and in pain, when they realized the stupidity of their choice. I agree it's not romantic or sweet. I understand their children trying to find comfort in the fact that they died together, but if I was one of their kids I would be furious. They could still be alive and together. Their deaths were pointless.
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Old 10-25-2020, 10:09 AM
  #10

Last night I saw their grandson being interviewed on the news. He said he understood their decision and said something like, "Where are 90 year olds supposed to evacuate to, a nursing home?" (I see in the article they weren't quite 90- but those are the words the grandson used). I'm glad the family is at peace with it, but if it were my parents I'd be furious. They could have gotten out and dying in a fire seems like a horrible death.

Maybe at their ages they just couldn't deal with the thought of all of the stress dealing with rebuilding afterwords. I sort of get that- I can't imagine the stress of dealing with that aftermath. I thankfully don't live near where there would be wildfires, but I've thought about how horrible it would be to have my house burn down before. My car was hit and totaled a couple of years ago and dealing with the insurance company was a horrible NIGHTMARE- I can't imagine how much worse it is when you're dealing with something so much more expensive like a house. Maybe they just didn't think they had the energy left to do it.


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Old 10-25-2020, 11:25 AM
  #11

Quote:
it made me mad when I heard that they had been offered and refused chances to evacuate. They could both be alive and together right now. They put rescuers in danger.
I am going to respectfully disagree. They knew the dangers. They didn't ask for anyone to risk their life rescuing them- they did what they felt like they needed to do.

Is it horrible? Yes. Is it anyone's fault other than the couple, who were in their right minds and chose this decision that resulted in their deaths? No. THey chose to stay in the place they lived for years and it didn't work out. They knew that was a possibility.

Sad, but... I would try to respect the choice they made and not harbor bad feelings or anger.
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Old 10-25-2020, 11:25 AM
  #12

Quote:
honestly, it made me mad when I heard that they had been offered and refused chances to evacuate. They could both be alive and together right now. They put rescuers in danger.
I had the same reaction. I feel badly for their kids as well.

I don't understand the decision, but I am not them. I am terrified of fire and being burnt alive is horrific. I would hope they died of smoke inhalation long before the fire got to them. The story makes it sound like they thought they'd be ok in their basement, which is a whole different thing than making a plan to perish together. I don't know which one is the truth. It's a sad story.
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Old 10-25-2020, 11:48 AM
  #13

This is a story of two people who could not think beyond themselves and most likely thought they would survive. This isn't a memory or experience that I would want for my children at all. My sister and her child survived a fire years ago that destroyed their home and entire neighborhood . They are deeply affected by that experience years later.
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Old 10-25-2020, 12:04 PM
  #14

If it were fiction, I would think it sweet. But it isn't it is real life and they are the age of my grandparents and I would be pissed if my grandparents were this stubborn. Well they ARE that stubborn, but it hasn't killed them yet.
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Old 10-25-2020, 12:27 PM
  #15

They made the choice that they thought was best for themselves. At 86 and 84, theyíve earned the right to think about whatís best for them and to make their own decisions. May perpetual light shine upon them.
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Old 10-25-2020, 02:02 PM
  #16

My momís friend told me that getting old is very unfair and isnít for the faint of heart. Either the body or mind breaks down, for some people it is both body and mind. They can no longer live life the way they used to. Many put their hears and souls into building a home they love.

I have to wonder if Covid played a roll in their decision. It has been a rough year for everyone. Maybe they couldnít face losing their home and rebuilding their life.

My FIL was getting dialysis because of kidney failure. After a year he decided to stop. He said it was no way to live. He died a week later.

I think older people make peace with death. It sounds like they did.
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Old 10-25-2020, 02:31 PM
  #17

Quote:
I think older people make peace with death. It sounds like they did.
Quote:
They made the choice that they thought was best for themselves. At 86 and 84, theyíve earned the right to think about whatís best for them and to make their own decisions. May perpetual light shine upon them.
Agree with both of the above. I refuse to judge them. They had a right to do what they felt best for THEIR lives.
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Old 10-25-2020, 02:48 PM
  #18

I couldn't read the article, but I just hope they had some way to overdose or something first so they didn't have to suffer. I can't imagine choosing to die in a fire.
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Old 10-25-2020, 03:19 PM
  #19

Itís a sad story. According to the article, they made their choice, they were at peace with it. I respect their choice. I hope their family finds peace in memories of them.
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Would I be able to do this?
Old 10-25-2020, 05:26 PM
  #20

Stay in a house with a fire approaching? Is this a real question?

I can't understand why ANYONE would do that, unless they have a suicide wish. Staying there will not prevent the fire from consuming their home. They should have left when they had the opportunity. They would be alive and well right now.

Instead, they died a horrifying, frightening, possibly very painful death, and for nothing. Their house still burned down. SMH.
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Old 10-25-2020, 05:35 PM
  #21

I think the couple or one of them thought the fire may not be as bad as it was and when it got to the point where they could not escape, they thought they could survive the fire by staying in the basement.They were elderly and may not have understood the problem with that plan.
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Old 10-25-2020, 07:22 PM
  #22

I think that is terrible. They both could have been evacuated. Im sure they have kids, grandkids, great grandkids. What a horrible thought for them to live with.
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Old 10-25-2020, 08:01 PM
  #23

My parents are 85 years old and I can't imagine living with the thought of them dying like that. I think it would be unbearable. I realize it was their decision but I do think it was selfish on their part. Now there are 2 seats missing at the family table.

After reading the article yesterday, I too thought about the lives put in jeopardy to help this couple evacuate. Those lives may not have known of the couple's wish.
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Old 10-26-2020, 06:05 AM
  #24

I might be able to understand this decision if one of them had a terminal illness or was living with tremendous pain. But to do this simply because they were attached to their property and didn't want to have to grieve a spouse? I think it's selfish. People risked their lives to help them. It must have been hell for their children knowing what was going to happen and not being able to talk them out of it.

I understand that people arrive at a point where they're ready to go. I have a 95 year old aunt who has been there for a decade. But she would never put her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren through something as awful as this.
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