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RockinTeach01 RockinTeach01 is offline
 
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Sticky Situation (Long...)
Old 05-26-2014, 06:43 AM
 
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Okay, let me start this post by saying that what I am going to write in this post is 150% not my personal character, hence the reason why I am so torn about this!

My family and I are moving next week. My husband has been commuting 1 1/2 hours to work for over two years and as I am sure you can imagine it's been difficult for all of us! The reason we stayed is that my son and I were both at our neighborhood school together (me as a teacher and he as a student) and it was a perfect situation. He graduates 5th grade next week and we figured now is pretty much the time to make the move since it will be a natural transition to Middle School anyway.

I have been keeping my eyes open for job postings in my new school district to be posted and sure enough they started popping up last week. I applied for three different middle schools within the area. I am going to teach middle school next year which will be a change for me but I figured I might as well follow my son...Poor boy is never going to get rid of his mom! Anyway, after I applied for the positions online I wrote a friendly email to the three principals introducing myself and letting them know I was looking forward to getting an interview at their school. I immediately received a response from two of the three principals. The principal from the school that is zoned for my neighborhood wrote back and said that it was nice to hear from me and to keep my eyes open as she will have quite a few openings over the next few weeks. The second principal responded by asking me to come in the next day and interview!! WOW! I interviewed the very next day and received a call that night and was offered the position...OMG! I accepted.

So here's my dilemma...I really loved the school I interviewed at. The principal was great. He was very thorough, took me on a tour of the school, answered all my questions, etc. My issue is this is literally the one and only school I have ever visited in this new district. This may be the best school for me in the end but I have knots in my stomach if I am making the right choice without even seeing any other schools. My worry is that the neighborhood school will have a position come up this week for my subject area and I will regret not holding out.

Here it comes...So my hubby thinks I should still look to see if this neighborhood school has a math position pop up over the next week and apply if it does. I know people do this all the time but I don't know if I can do it. He says it will give me some closure to know which school I like better. What if I like the neighborhood school better though?? I need advice. Help!


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Old 05-26-2014, 07:00 AM
 
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Be careful. Around here if you accept a position and then back out you will not get another offer in the district. I would take the job you accepted and see how it goes for the year. If you don't like it, you could apply again next year.
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Old 05-26-2014, 07:02 AM
 
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Honestly, I would take the job that has already been offered AFTER I checked around to see how to working condtions are. You could probably still interview for another job if one comes open.
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Old 05-26-2014, 07:02 AM
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Old 05-26-2014, 07:05 AM
 
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I would not back out. I would take the job and see how you feel next year.
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It's only one year, right?
Old 05-26-2014, 07:11 AM
 
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That's my thought...Give it a year and see how I feel. I can't lie that it is still killing me mentally though. Ugh!!!

*Onion Girl...I totally agree. I feel like districts can be so small at times and I don't want to burn any bridges coming into a new district.
My hubby says that since all my references are from my old district I won't be crossing any paths. Is it apparent he is the ruler bender and I am the ruler follower!


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I already accepted though...
Old 05-26-2014, 07:16 AM
 
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Elemteach22....I was afraid to say no because I had nothing else. It would've been a big risk to say no because the reality is I could end up with nothing in the end.
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I wouldn't back out.
Old 05-26-2014, 07:26 AM
 
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It's always hard to change jobs, but if you accept an offer, you should go with it for at least the year you agreed upon. Teaching there for one year will give you a chance to see what the other schools are like, and decide if you want to try for a different school next year.
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Old 05-26-2014, 07:38 AM
 
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People talk and if you back out it may hurt you. I would do this one for a year. It gives you a year in MS to see if you like it.

It also gives your DS a year to get adjusted without mommy being around all the time. I had a rule not to work where my kids went to school. Yes, I know it works for some, but it can also be difficult for parent and/or child. Give him the year.

If you don't lime your school you can apply for other positions in the neighborhoodMS next year or decide elementary is really where you need to be.
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TeachnKids....
Old 05-26-2014, 07:47 AM
 
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Would it shock you that my son wants to come with me??? I know it's crazy, right? I told him that he could still go to the neighborhood middle school but he seems to have a little sense of security knowing that I will be with him. I think he is a little apprehensive since he will be leaving all the kids he has been with since Kindergarten. I think that also throws a wrench into all this because what if I don't like this school and he comes with me and I decide to leave. Then he switches schools again! Ugh..decisions, decisions...

My husband and I are actually taking our son on tours of both schools next week and letting him make a final decision then on what he wants to do. Of course the parents have the final say in the event that one school stands out over the other but we are trying to make him feel like he has a say in all this.
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Old 05-26-2014, 07:52 AM
 
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I absolutely would send my child to the neighborhood school!!! You have no idea where you will be in a year. If he goes to the neighborhood school he will get to know the kids in the neighborhood and be grounded. If he goes with oy to the other school he could be uprooted twice in two years. Not god at any age, but especially not good at his age! I have taught MSand it is hard enough without changing schools twice!


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Valid point!
Old 05-26-2014, 08:14 AM
 
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Totally agree with you Thanks for the advice
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Don't back out
Old 05-26-2014, 08:28 AM
 
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From what I understand, the school you accepted a job in is in the same district as your neighborhood school, correct? I would keep the job you have. Applying for a job within the same district you were just hired seems dishonest. I feel like that would give you a "bad reputation" in the district. Keep this job and see how you like it. If you don't, you can always follow the internal transfer process next year.

On a side note, I'm sure you like the idea of "following" your son and being at the same school. However, maybe it will be good for you and your son to experience something different and then decide what you like best. If you still want your son at your school, could you open enroll him in your school?
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Dishonest...
Old 05-26-2014, 10:49 AM
 
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I here ya. I feel the same way. Yes, I can always switch my son to my school whenever I want.
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Old 05-26-2014, 11:51 AM
 
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Get a feel for the district, then wait to transfer.
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Majority rules...
Old 05-26-2014, 12:16 PM
 
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Now I can tell my hubby that the teaching community stands behind me to stay! Thanks everyone!
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Old 05-26-2014, 02:46 PM
 
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Late to the party, but I'm glad you're going with what others have said. I would stick with the job you were offered (don't black list yourself before you even get in the door!) and I would send your son to the neighborhood school. He's been with you his entire life, at the same school... I actually shuddered a bit when I saw this:
Quote:
I am going to teach middle school next year which will be a change for me but I figured I might as well follow my son...Poor boy is never going to get rid of his mom!
I get that he might want to be with you, too, but I think it's really important for kids to have to make it without mom, too. I've worked at school with my kids for several years in elementary, until they hit middle school. My middle child has asperger syndrome, and was super attached to me. It's been a learning curve for him, but SO good for him to make his way in a new school without me around. He relies too much on me (he went to middle this year for the first time), and he did just fine (after an adjustment) at his new school. Teach middle school if that's what you want to try, but I wouldn't do it because your son is that age-- would you move to high school in 3 years? I personally find it easier to teach the age my kids aren't, because too much of the same age drives me nuts , but I know that may not be the case for everyone. I'd just worry a bit about not having time to grow apart from mom if mom is always there at school. Maybe that's just me

Anyway, congrats on the job and in making the move! I'm sure you'll love life getting back to "normal!"
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Old 05-26-2014, 03:41 PM
 
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Yes definitely keep the job you already took. I also agree to send your son to the neighborhood school because you don't want him to change schools later.

Here's my story...kinda similar to yours in some ways...

I never taught in the same school as any of my kids until last year. We were in a new state and I got a job in 7th grade and my son went to 6th. He is not dependent on me, and I am not one of those overbearing Moms, it's just how it happened. This year he is actually in my class. He chose this and I felt that my team was the best for him anyway, so that's what we did. This would not work for every kid for sure, and most schools don't even allow it, but this is the south!

Anyway, I just got a new job in our home state for next year - 6th grade position and my son will be in 8th. I'm glad he will have some more freedom from me. We will be in the same school again, but he will have his freedoms and I know he will have a great transition to high school. I don't really get any more involved with his friends/teachers than I would if I was teaching somewhere else...but it IS nice to put faces to the names!

Funny thing is, when he goes to high school, my youngest will be a 6th grader. So I have 4 more years of sharing a school with my boys.
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Old 05-26-2014, 10:22 PM
 
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I guess I am doing bad. I actually accepted 3 offers from 3 different districts and well obviously i have to make a choice but when I do I have to tell the others that I won't be working there afterall. Is that bad? Well one of them, I have actually done paperwork. The other 2 i haven officially accepted the Human Resource offer. I just can't decide since they all have advantages and disadvantages.
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Do not back out
Old 05-27-2014, 07:18 AM
 
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You accepted the offer. Put in a year and see how it goes. If it's awful, try for the other school.

If you back out, you will get a red flag by your name for future hirings (at least in my district). The principals talk.
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Old 05-27-2014, 08:43 AM
 
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Different districts is another story. You should explore all offers, although once I fill out paperwork, I feel that I am committed and wouldn't back out of that.
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