At my breaking point - ProTeacher Community




Home Join Now Search My Favorites
Help


      The VENT

At my breaking point

>

Reply
 
Thread Tools
mrteacherguy mrteacherguy is offline
 
Joined: Jul 2013
Posts: 96
Full Member

mrteacherguy
 
Joined: Jul 2013
Posts: 96
Full Member
At my breaking point
Old 01-28-2020, 02:42 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #1

This is my 7th year teaching middle school, but lately I've been feeling as out of my depth as a first year teacher. I am at a different school/district than I was in during my first six years.

To put it bluntly, I feel like I'm at my breaking point emotionally and mentally. This has been my worst year; even during my first year when I was dealing with what I though was a rough group, I never gave any thought to quitting, I never broke down and cried (in private) nor had to call someone to cover my class because I couldn't handle it any longer. But this year, even though I have had years where I love what I do, I am ready to leave the field of teaching. My students have been, as a whole, antagonistic from day one with little to no respect given; I've called to have someone watch my class so I could step out on three different occasions; and while there are a few good kids in the group I truly do not like the group as a whole.

The problem is that I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place: I have a family that depends on me with debt and bills to pay, so I can't quit outright without something else lined up, but I truly don't know how much longer I can keep coming in to students that seem to hate me and an admin that doesn't do much to curb behavior.


mrteacherguy is offline   Reply With Quote

SoDone SoDone is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 157
Full Member

SoDone
 
Joined: Oct 2018
Posts: 157
Full Member
Almost over
Old 01-28-2020, 03:35 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #2

I'm there with you even down to the years of experience you have. I'm a single mom so I also can't up and walk out (I think that only gets to happen in books and on TV). While I have not found anything that works on a consistent basis with my group, I do give lots of book work (section reading with TDQs) instead of knocking myself out trying to teach above the noise. If you aren't already doing that, try it to save some sanity. Try to make it - don't let them win. It's honestly not all on us if we can't magically form perfect relationships to get the desired behavior. In the real world, personalities do clash. We are stronger than pre-pubescent tyrants!
SoDone is offline   Reply With Quote
Survivor2
 
 
Guest

Survivor2
 
 
Guest
My reply
Old 01-28-2020, 05:26 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #3

Iíve had exactly one year like that in my teaching career and I will tell you exactly what to do that worked for me. To survive in this kind of eat or be eaten environment you have to shift your focus off of the students and on to you. And donít feel bad about it. Youíre not a bad teacher for doing this. Next year youíll be back to your old happy self again but for the rest of this year you need to keep those kids busy from the time they walk in until the time they leave. Test scores and even learning can no longer matter. Only your survival does. They work. You watch. If they need help tell them to come to you. Time will pass. Theyíll get used to it and before you know it the year will be over!
  Reply With Quote
Englishish's Avatar
Englishish Englishish is offline
 
Joined: Jan 2020
Posts: 134
Full Member

Englishish
 
Englishish's Avatar
 
Joined: Jan 2020
Posts: 134
Full Member
Tea and sympathy
Old 01-28-2020, 05:26 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #4

I donít have a ton to offer other than to say Iíve been there, too. I know it doesnít seem like it, but this year will be over in just a few months. If you can hang on until then, next year is bound to be better. In the meantime, is there anything that youíve found that this class really enjoys?
Englishish is offline   Reply With Quote
mauiwow mauiwow is offline
 
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 141
Full Member

mauiwow
 
Joined: Nov 2013
Posts: 141
Full Member
You got this
Old 01-28-2020, 05:49 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #5

Take those mental health days. Take all the days you need to reset for this difficult batch of kids. Remember they are kids at the end of the day and they are lashing out due to their insecurities and prior experiences, and nothing you should take personally. I am sure you tried to build relationship and rapport with the kids, but they are still disrespectful and you are trying your best with little support from admin.

My fault is I always take things too personality and often have to take a step back and analyze the system and situation. Know that we work in a broken system. We try our best everyday but how can we fix a broken outdated system so called school that is meant to help children yet lack the supports and resources we need to be impactful.

Self-care mental health days will help keep you afloat, heck take the sick days and get a mental health doctors note if needed because this stress will impact your health and I have totally been there and know that self reflection time does not happen till you get a break/piece of mind.

Hang in there.


mauiwow is offline   Reply With Quote
dutchgirl's Avatar
dutchgirl dutchgirl is offline
 
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,601
Senior Member

dutchgirl
 
dutchgirl's Avatar
 
Joined: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,601
Senior Member

Old 01-28-2020, 06:43 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #6

Oh boy, do I hear you! For the first time in 20 years of teaching, 9th year of teaching middle school, I begged to have several kids moved out of one class. They moved one today, and it helped - for today anyway.

Other posters have given good advice; remember they are mis-raised kids who truly have no idea to behave. It's frustrating when they pick on you - And yes, there are some that definitely do that. Try to privately pull aside kids who are the followers and work on getting to know them. If they stop following, the instigators lose their power.

I'm trying that, and it is HARD! I've decided these kids are racist, ageist, and sexist - to them, I'm just an old white lady. (I never have even thought of these terms, but this year it occurred to me that it may be part of the problem!)
dutchgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Lottalove's Avatar
Lottalove Lottalove is offline
 
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,109
Senior Member

Lottalove
 
Lottalove's Avatar
 
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,109
Senior Member
Think of it as the Seven Year Itch...
Old 01-29-2020, 10:05 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #7

only for Career, not marriage.

Look around at your options, be prepared to change something-jobs, grade level, subject, whatever-- if it happens, it happens. If not, be ready to start next school year with a fresh attitude.

Good luck to you. I was like that two years ago and powered through. For me, I hate change more than I hate the doldrums.
Lottalove is offline   Reply With Quote
2020Guest
 
 
Guest

2020Guest
 
 
Guest
I feel the same way
Old 01-29-2020, 04:53 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #8

and this is only my first year of teaching and I'm ready to change careers already! Each day I tell myself this is too much for anyone to endure! I agree with lottalove about changing grade level or subject. I'm currently in middle school and I am going to move to elementary.
  Reply With Quote
Nathalie L
 
 
Guest

Nathalie L
 
 
Guest
I feel for you
Old 02-20-2020, 06:08 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #9

It nice to know that Iím not alone. Itís my second month in a new second school after spending 6 years in my first school and it has been so so bad. As a new teacher I was given all the lower ability classes, 4 out of 5 of my classes are students who canít be bothered and with multiple behavioral issues, new ones come up after they drain my energy to deal with existing ones.

Today I felt like I reached my breaking point and broke down twice. More so from feeling overwhelmed with the never ending issues of students that prevents me from doing what I find most satisfaction in, which is teaching them and helping them improve in their subject.

I know that you are feeling very torn right now between your personal mental health and providing for your family. But what I would say is that your family needs you more than money. You can always earn a living in other ways. And there are ways to adjust lifestyles to suit each budget. When your mental health suffers, itís just not worthwhile.
  Reply With Quote

Join the conversation! Post as a guest or become a member today. New members welcome!

Reply

 

>
The VENT
Thread Tools




Sign Up Now

Sign Up FREE | ProTeacher Help | BusyBoard

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 01:39 PM.

Copyright © 2019 ProTeacher®
For individual use only. Do not copy, reproduce or transmit.
source: www.proteacher.net