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April Fools Day $50 Drawing Winner! [April Fools!]
Old 04-02-2016, 04:23 PM
  #1

Thank you to everyone who participated at ProTeacher this past week! Thank you for making ProTeacher a friendly, fun and supportive place to ask questions and share experiences with fellow teachers. We all win when we share ideas and support each other!

We announced our April Fools Day drawing on April 2. Rather than the usual email RSVP, we decided to not post a link on our home page to the April Fools Day drawing entry form. Members who visited ProTeacher on April Fools Day no doubt missed the large colorful April Fools Day image on our home page.

Thank you to all the many members who participate in our April Fools Day drawing! Sorry to anyone who will miss this drawing!

[drum roll..]

And here isn't the lucky WINNER of this week's April Fools Day Drawing. The winner will receive a $50 Amazon.com gift certificate!






Congratulations:



Nadie



winner of the random drawing:


Thanks again to everyone who will participate!
Stay tuned for our next drawing!



How the winner will be selected:

To select our winner, we will use the 'true random number generator' at random.org to choose one random number between 1 and the number of replies on this thread. The generator will give us a number which we will match up with the reply numbers on this thread. The matching reply will be our winner provided that the winning member posts no more than two replies on this thread, and if so, not consecutively. If posting a second reply, the winner must include a joke or riddle (PG or G rated) in their second reply. We will not count extra replies deleted by members on their own (members have up to 24 hours to edit or delete posts on ProTeacher), but we can not help members delete extra replies (sorry). We will repeat this process until we find a winner.

All replies must be posted by 10 pm PST Wedneday, April 6th. The Winner will be announced Thursday, April 7th. Winner must claim prize within 30 days or forfeit the prize. The winner's prize will be sent by email. Please keep the email address associated with your ProTeacher account valid and up-to-date! We never share your email address with anyone, and that's no joke.


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I am very confused....
Old 04-02-2016, 05:52 PM
  #2

I can't follow this post. I didn't see any April fools day image or anything about a drawing. Maybe that's the joke? Maybe I'm dense, but I don't get it....


I just reread this for the third time, and now I understand! Sometimes a bit slow, it's been a rough week!

Last edited by Munchkins; 04-02-2016 at 06:30 PM.. Reason: Oh...now I get it!
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Count me in
Old 04-02-2016, 05:54 PM
  #3

I am also confused!
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Reply
Old 04-02-2016, 06:09 PM
  #4

I think I get it but I now need someone to post another reply before I can comment again with a joke.....
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Old 04-02-2016, 06:12 PM
  #5

Ahhh....now I get it. I needed to do some close reading.


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Um, say what?
Old 04-02-2016, 06:28 PM
  #6

Yep, confused here, too. I think I get it, but I'm not sure.
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I think I get it!
Old 04-02-2016, 06:40 PM
  #7

I love you all at PT. You truly are "friendly, fun and supportive!"
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Old 04-02-2016, 06:43 PM
  #8

Quote:
I needed to do some close reading
PEPteach made me laugh!
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Bob Hope
Old 04-02-2016, 06:46 PM
  #9

He was one of my favorite comedians. I remember when he was on his deathbed and his wife asked him where he wanted to be buried. He answered, "Surprise me."

Here's another favorite joke of his:

"Welcome to the Academy Awards. Or as it’s known at my house, Passover.”
Hope's most famous crack about his most famous running gag at the Academy Awards: never winning an Oscar himself. Hope, who hosted or co-hosted the show a record 19 times, was somewhat disingenuous: The Academy actually gave him five awards over the years, all honorary.
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Gotta love teacher jokes...
Old 04-02-2016, 06:47 PM
  #10

Why did the teacher marry the janitor?



Because he swept her off her feet!



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Joke
Old 04-02-2016, 06:49 PM
  #11

What's blue and smells like red paint?



Blue paint.
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Old 04-02-2016, 07:01 PM
  #12

I love contests! No joke.

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Reread, reread, reread
Old 04-02-2016, 07:19 PM
  #13

I had to reread several times. The first time I just read the first part then I scanned the second time and noticed the bottom part but didn't reread. The third time I read all the way through. So I understand now. I think...
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Old 04-02-2016, 07:30 PM
  #14

Oh good grief - that was too much thinking for a Saturday night!
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For cat lovers
Old 04-02-2016, 07:36 PM
  #15

What do you call a big pile of kittens? A meowntain.
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I wonder if that's how
Old 04-02-2016, 07:41 PM
  #16

I sound to the students when I give them directions. I hope not!
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Old 04-02-2016, 07:57 PM
  #17

Why was the student's report card all wet?
Because it was below C (sea) level
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Old 04-02-2016, 08:28 PM
  #18

This is like when you give students a paper and they don't read the directions before they start asking you what to do!! !!
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Old 04-02-2016, 09:00 PM
  #19

This is funny. I almost didn't click on this thread because I didn't enter the contest. I love the jokes.
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Old 04-02-2016, 09:25 PM
  #20

Wow. Gotta think hard to figure things out.
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Old 04-02-2016, 09:53 PM
  #21

Here's my favorite joke - with help from my girl.
Attachment

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Old 04-03-2016, 02:05 AM
  #22

Close reading at its finest! Thank you for the lesson

Here's a little joke:
Stressing the importance of a good vocabulary, the teacher told her young charges, "Use a word ten times, and it shall be yours for life."

From somewhere in the back of the room, came a small male voice chanting, "Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda, Amanda
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Drawing
Old 04-03-2016, 02:14 AM
  #23

Glad I'm not the only one who was confused. I read the directions 3 times. I think I get it now!
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This took me a bit
Old 04-03-2016, 02:46 AM
  #24



I felt like my students
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Old 04-03-2016, 02:55 AM
  #25

Good morning! I read this last night...sort of. I did a much more thorough job this morning, and now I know what I need to do.
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:45 AM
  #26

Hopefully I understand.
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Funny!
Old 04-03-2016, 04:24 AM
  #27

. I think I get it!
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Clever!
Old 04-03-2016, 04:46 AM
  #28

Nice job on this PT!!

Last edited by gardener5; 04-03-2016 at 05:16 AM..
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Old 04-03-2016, 04:55 AM
  #29

Very clever idea!


A woman noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. “Haha! That’s not going to help,” she said.

“Sure, it does,” he said. “It’s the only way I can see the numbers.”
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Old 04-03-2016, 04:56 AM
  #30

Do you folks know that the listed winner, NADIE, means 'no one' in Spanish?
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:00 AM
  #31

Where do snowmen keep their money?

In snow banks.

Appropriate as we are expecting 6 inches of snow today.
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:05 AM
  #32

Clever PT! I had to read twice. I am a skimmer .
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Such fun
Old 04-03-2016, 05:06 AM
  #33

I was totally confused until I read the last paragraph. Thanks for keeping it interesting!
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:09 AM
  #34

Keep 'em coming.

I once gave my husband the silent treatment for a whole week. Sunday afternoon he told me, "Hey, we've been getting along great lately!"
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A PT "gotcha"!!
Old 04-03-2016, 05:13 AM
  #35

Oh, editors, you got me!!

Why did the teacher tell her students not to trust atoms?





Because they make up EVERYTHING!!!
(badumbum, I'm here all week, folks)
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Great lesson
Old 04-03-2016, 05:16 AM
  #36

This is a great lesson for teachers on reading closely. I read the post but not the part about how a winner will be selected. Then I read a few comments and saw that everyone was confused by the post, but a few thought they had figured it out. I went back and closely read the whole thing and I also now think I understand!
Very clever PT!
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:17 AM
  #37

What is a math teacher’s favorite sum?
Summer!
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1st reply
Old 04-03-2016, 05:21 AM
  #38

Okay, I think I get it....



Knock, knock..... [reply to follow]
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Haha!
Old 04-03-2016, 05:22 AM
  #39

Great joke, but looking forward to the real announcement on April 6th!
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Joke
Old 04-03-2016, 05:26 AM
  #40

Q: What is a golfer's favorite letter?

A: tee
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Joke
Old 04-03-2016, 05:30 AM
  #41

What's the ratio of an igloos circumference to its diametet?
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Eskimo pi!
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:31 AM
  #42

Great lesson....practice what we preach!

Last edited by teachnkids; 04-03-2016 at 06:22 PM..
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2nd reply
Old 04-03-2016, 05:32 AM
  #43

.....who's there?

Banana.

Banana Who?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Banana.

Banana Who?

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange Who?

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

[This joke cracks up my first graders]
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:33 AM
  #44

This is great!
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I am jaded
Old 04-03-2016, 05:34 AM
  #45

I barely looked at the announcement the first time.
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Now for the joke!
Old 04-03-2016, 05:43 AM
  #46

One day a first grade teacher handed out a coloring sheet to her students. On it was a picture of a frog holding an umbrella.
When the students finished coloring the picture, one little boy had colored the frog a bright purple.
The teacher asked the little boy how many times he had ever seen a purple frog.
The little boy replied, "About as many times as I've seen a frog holding an umbrella!"
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:55 AM
  #47

I get it now. I guess I should have read it better the first time I looked at it.
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Old 04-03-2016, 06:42 AM
  #48

I get it now. Why is 6 afraid of 7! Because 7 8 9.
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Old 04-03-2016, 06:48 AM
  #49

. That was funny! I was thinking, "I always get the emails. I wonder how I missed this one?"
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I think I understand
Old 04-03-2016, 07:15 AM
  #50

Had to read three times too. I think I get it now.
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:20 AM
  #51

That one took a minute. Guess I should read instead of skimming.
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Funny
Old 04-03-2016, 07:29 AM
  #52

I almost didn't read this thread since I knew I hadn't entered a contest. I was even feeling disappointed that I'd missed a contest since I love the PT drawings. But I thought that any thread with 50 some replies must be worth reading, and I was right!
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drawing
Old 04-03-2016, 07:30 AM
  #53

PT is keeping us on our toes.
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:31 AM
  #54

Perfect! Teachers who take attendance are absent minded.
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:33 AM
  #55

What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an anesthesiologist?

The Ether Bunny
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:36 AM
  #56

A little boy told his teacher, " I don't want you to worry, but my dad said if I don't get a better grade someone is going to get a spanking!"
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:38 AM
  #57

A zookeeper is ordering new 
animals. As he fills out the forms, he types “two mongeese.” That doesn’t look right, so he tries “two mongoose,” then “two mongooses.” Giving up, he types, “One mongoose, and while you’re at it, send another one.”
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:43 AM
  #58

I was always told to read the fine print...
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why did the chicken cross the road
Old 04-03-2016, 07:44 AM
  #59

To get to the other side.


Oh, I thought of a better one: What do you call a deer with no eyes?




I have no "eye"deer

Last edited by Savvy; 04-03-2016 at 09:17 AM..
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Old 04-03-2016, 07:50 AM
  #60

I love all these jokes. I'll have a few new ones to tell my kids.
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My turn! My turn!
Old 04-03-2016, 08:01 AM
  #61

What do you call a bear with no teeth?






























A gummy bear!!


*

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Old 04-03-2016, 08:05 AM
  #62

My girls' favorite:

Why did the banana go to the doctor?

He wasn't peeling well.

(then proceed to tell other 'jokes' that aren't funny in the least but will cause them to fall over laughing)
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Old 04-03-2016, 08:08 AM
  #63

What's bright and yellow and arrives every morning to brighten your mom's day?


The school bus!
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Old 04-03-2016, 08:10 AM
  #64

I love Jelly Bellies. No joke.



How long a thread will this end up being?
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Wow.
Old 04-03-2016, 08:32 AM
  #65

And we tell our students to read closely. I'm so used to seeing these Congratulations posts that I skimmed my way through and completely missed the key words ending up completely confused. It didn't even occur to me to read the post again until I started reading the comments. I just wanted to know why I didn't get an email (did it go to spam for the first time) and how did I miss this on the board because I know I visited. After all, Proteacher is my therapy. SMH
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Old 04-03-2016, 08:52 AM
  #66

I always tell my students, read all of the directions. And did I? No, not until I saw others' posts. I'm like that kid who turns in the assignment and then say, "There was a back?!"
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Old 04-03-2016, 09:00 AM
  #67

Very clever editors!

Here's something from my favorite cartoonist Liz Climo, reminds me of being a kindergarten teacher

http://lizclimo.tumblr.com/image/49492994491
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Old 04-03-2016, 09:11 AM
  #68

I'm on Spring Break and this post really made me have to think. Not cool.

But maybe I'll be the winner.
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Awesome
Old 04-03-2016, 09:16 AM
  #69

Great fun to extend the April fools day excitement
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Old 04-03-2016, 09:31 AM
  #70

Great idea! I had to re-read too...
This one is my 3rd graders' favorite:
Why does the teacher always wear sunglasses?
Because her students are so brilliant
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Old 04-03-2016, 09:52 AM
  #71

Wow, glad I came back here to check on this thread! Just skimmed first time and was sad I didn't get my usual email. Live and learn!
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Lol
Old 04-03-2016, 09:58 AM
  #72

All I can do is laugh.
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Old 04-03-2016, 10:23 AM
  #73

Will this reply be the lucky one?!
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what a great idea!
Old 04-03-2016, 10:25 AM
  #74

I love all the jokes!
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???
Old 04-03-2016, 10:49 AM
  #75

I certainly feel like an April fool.
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Old 04-03-2016, 10:57 AM
  #76

Here's a joke I remember from my childhood and my first graders still love it:

How do you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogey in it!
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:)
Old 04-03-2016, 11:57 AM
  #77

No one at school got me, but this had me
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For my second post
Old 04-03-2016, 12:09 PM
  #78

I will post an extremely lame joke:

What kind of dot dances? A polka dot.


One of my issues is that I cannot remember jokes. This is one of the few I can actually remember.
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Enjoying the jokes!
Old 04-03-2016, 02:15 PM
  #79

Teachers can be so clever!
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Old 04-03-2016, 02:16 PM
  #80

I love contests too
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Old 04-03-2016, 02:59 PM
  #81

Now I know why I always tell my students to read carefully, and to read it again!
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:02 PM
  #82

Do anti-jokes count?

What is red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:06 PM
  #83

A sodium atom and a chlorine atom go into a bar. The chlorine atom steals one of sodium's electrons. The bartender asked sodium, "Are you sure chlorine took your electron?" "Of course! I'm positive!"

So the police were called.

And both atoms were charged....

....with assault. (A salt....get it?)
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Very tricky!
Old 04-03-2016, 03:07 PM
  #84

I had to go back and reread this again after I started reading some of the replies. Editors, you are really keeping us on our toes!
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:14 PM
  #85

I think spring break was obviously very relaxing for me, brain included. I read the original post the other day and thought I had missed something. I was actually missing working brain cells.
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:15 PM
  #86

What the king do with his armies?









Put them in his sleevies.
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:36 PM
  #87

What's Luke Skywalker's favorite car?
.
.
.
.
.
.a Toy Yoda!
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Old 04-03-2016, 03:41 PM
  #88

Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?
A: Because she will Let it go.

source: http://jokes4us.com/miscellaneousjok.../kidjokes.html
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Old 04-03-2016, 04:56 PM
  #89

This thread is making me smile. Almost completely skipped this thread and then decided to see who won.
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:20 PM
  #90

Why did the teacher write the lesson on the windows?


She wanted it to be clear.
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Old 04-03-2016, 05:36 PM
  #91

A gift card could really help me get over the snow we are starting spring break with.
And the fact that we were literally pulling out of the driveway to go to Florida, and had to cancel our trip.
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Old 04-03-2016, 06:28 PM
  #92

Did you hear the joke about butter?




Never mind ... I shouldn't spread it.
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2nd Reply
Old 04-03-2016, 07:32 PM
  #93

What do you call ten rabbits walking backwards?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
A receding hareline
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Old 04-03-2016, 09:50 PM
  #94

I guess, I have to come up with a joke now
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Close reading indeed!
Old 04-03-2016, 10:19 PM
  #95

We are so much like our students!
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No joke...
Old 04-04-2016, 05:06 AM
  #96

I hope I win!!
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Old 04-04-2016, 05:50 AM
  #97

Great April Fool's joke - fool us into revealing we aren't as good at close reading as we want our students to be.

I hope I win!
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PD Activity?
Old 04-04-2016, 07:28 AM
  #98

I can only imagine how this would work at one of our department meetings...
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And now a joke!
Old 04-04-2016, 10:52 AM
  #99

Why did the bicycle fall over?

It was two tired (too tired).

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2nd reply
Old 04-04-2016, 11:10 AM
  #100

One day on Mercury lasts approximately 1408 hours...........

......
.....
.....
....
....



The same as one Monday on Earth.

Enough said.
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Confused!
Old 04-04-2016, 11:26 AM
  #101

Boy was I confused! I didn't even read the fine print the first time!
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Old 04-04-2016, 12:35 PM
  #102

See what I miss when I go on spring break
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april fool
Old 04-04-2016, 02:01 PM
  #103

I wondered why there were so many posts on this thread???? NOW I know!
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Old 04-04-2016, 02:08 PM
  #104

It takes some of us a little longer to read the fine print.
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Count me in!
Old 04-04-2016, 02:20 PM
  #105

I hope I win it!
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Old 04-04-2016, 03:25 PM
  #106

Don't trust atoms.
They make up everything.
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Old 04-04-2016, 03:31 PM
  #107

9 out of 10 voices in my head are telling me that I am too fat. The last one is calmly preparing a bowl of chips.
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I Read This Yesterday
Old 04-04-2016, 03:55 PM
  #108

but I was too lazy to respond considering it required more brain power than I felt like using. Today, feeling rested and wanting a chance to win, I'm back. I even looked up the meaning of "nadie" and to that I will say, "Clever, very clever."
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Very good!
Old 04-04-2016, 05:04 PM
  #109

I too had to read and re-read. lol


Do you know how ducks get flat feet?
















From stomping out forest fires....
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Dirty Joke!
Old 04-04-2016, 05:07 PM
  #110

A little boy fell in a mud puddle.
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Took me several reads....
Old 04-04-2016, 05:08 PM
  #111

To get this! 😀
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Fun reading!
Old 04-04-2016, 05:10 PM
  #112

Just saw this today....loved the jokes! Will try to post one of my own tomorrow.
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part 2
Old 04-04-2016, 05:15 PM
  #113

Do you know how elephants get flat feet?








from stomping out flaming ducks....




you have to read both posts to get this...
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Here's my joke...
Old 04-04-2016, 05:35 PM
  #114

Why was 8 complaining?

Her belt was too tight.
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Here's my joke!
Old 04-04-2016, 05:47 PM
  #115

Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?


Because she couldn't control her pupils!!

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I Was Wondering
Old 04-05-2016, 02:29 AM
  #116

I thought I missed an email. I guess not.
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Math riddle
Old 04-05-2016, 05:52 AM
  #117

How can you make the number seven even?




Take away the S

Last edited by tctrojan; 04-05-2016 at 05:53 AM.. Reason: typo
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Riddle
Old 04-05-2016, 06:08 AM
  #118

I there are 3 apples and you take 2 away, how many do you have?
*
*
*
Well, 2, because you took them
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Old 04-05-2016, 06:24 AM
  #119

I love reading the jokes! This is one of my favorite jokes but I usually get blank stares when I tell it.

Daddy Ghost rushes Mama Ghost to the hospital. She's just gone into labor. He gets her situated with the doctor in the delivery room and is then sent out into the waiting room. He's so nervous! He paces up and down and around the chairs. He doesn't know what to do with himself. Finally, after what seems like an eternity, the nurse comes out and tells him, "Congratulations! You have a handkerchief!"
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here's my joke
Old 04-05-2016, 08:55 AM
  #120

How do the bees get to school?

On the SCHOOL BUZZ!!!

Well, my three year old grandson thinks it's hilarious!
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Old 04-05-2016, 09:52 AM
  #121

Q: What does a nosey pepper do?


A: Gets jalapeno business!
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Old 04-05-2016, 11:35 AM
  #122

Q: Why do bananas have to put on sunscreen before they go to the beach?
A: Because they might peel!
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Old 04-05-2016, 05:13 PM
  #123

we are eating left over pizza for dinner tonight. Must thought you ought to know.
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Old 04-06-2016, 11:51 AM
  #124

What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Old 04-06-2016, 12:40 PM
  #125

Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?

The food is great but there's no atmosphere.
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Old 04-06-2016, 05:53 PM
  #126

What do you call an old snowman?



Water!
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