Spineless principal - ProTeacher Community




Home Join Now Search My Favorites
Help


      The VENT

Spineless principal

>

Reply
 
Thread Tools
70Primrose 70Primrose is offline
 
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 145
Full Member

70Primrose
 
Joined: Apr 2019
Posts: 145
Full Member
Spineless principal
Old 09-21-2019, 01:15 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #1

My principal picks on our emails all the time. She tells us she wants us to cc her on all our emails to parents. When we do she always finds fault either with what we said, how we said it or grammar mistakes. She says, "If you would like a second pair of eyes before you send it let me know." Everyone that I have talked to about emails tells me she does this to them, it is not just me. We have all started just taking bad behavior, never contacting parents, and just trying to deal on our own. She hates parents coming in to talk to her, she never has our back. I had to talk with our teacher union one time about a parent because I felt I was being harassed by a parent. The rep that came out said, "Yep, she (our P) hates confrontation with parents."

I recently sent an email to a students guardians describing behavior. It was completely anecdotal. He has a doctor appt next week regarding behavior issues and I need the doctor to know how his behavior is impacting his learning and that of my other students. The only thing I said that could be construed at a personal comment was, "His behavior makes it hard to teach." Well the guardian showed up upset because she felt I didn't say anything nice about him. I was listing behavior!! It was information for his doctor visit. I got talked to by my P and told that I should have included something nice. Right now there is not anything nice. I guess I could have said, "He didn't burn down the school." I feel trapped, I feel I have no support from parents or admin. Is this normal? Do I have to just shut up and suck it up? Was I wrong to say his behavior makes it hard to teach? Why do other students have to suffer because of him? Why does my P not care about them? Why is he so important and his needs trump all others? I am so frustrated!!


70Primrose is offline   Reply With Quote

klarabelle's Avatar
klarabelle klarabelle is online now
 
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 17,946
Senior Member

klarabelle
 
klarabelle's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 17,946
Senior Member

Old 09-21-2019, 03:20 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #2

I think you said the right thing since you were letting the doctor know how his behavior effected him & others. I had a P like this, in fact she locked the doors in the morning so parents could not come in to speak with her. I don't understand them.
klarabelle is online now   Reply With Quote
SusanTeach's Avatar
SusanTeach SusanTeach is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 16,131
Senior Member

SusanTeach
 
SusanTeach's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 16,131
Senior Member

Old 09-21-2019, 04:40 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #3

I think the principal saying she could be a second set of eyes is nice. She just doesn't want an email to go out with grammatical errors since we're the ones teaching their children. I get that. Parents will nit-pick at everything sometimes, so we don't want to do anything to give them another reason to complain.

I agree about saying something nice about the boy. I do know sometimes it's hard to find the positive, but parents/guardians like to know that you're seeing the good in their child even when it's hard. Remember, they love that child and want the best for them. Most parents know the child's faults (even if they won't admit it). They just want to know you're seeing the good in the child as well. If you can find the good, then you can use that to help with the negative (like him helping by walking a child to the nurse because he likes to be out of his seat all the time).

It's always frustrating when you have a major behavior problem. The dr. should give you a form to fill out that gets faxed directly to him and isn't seen/read by the parent. That way you can be totally honest without it being hurtful to the parent.

This is a vent board, so I promise I'm not giving you a hard time. I understand the stress involved (boy, do I!) when you have a serious behavior problem. I'm just giving you another perspective.

I hope your year gets better!
SusanTeach is offline   Reply With Quote
NJ Teacher's Avatar
NJ Teacher NJ Teacher is offline
 
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 7,793
Senior Member

NJ Teacher
 
NJ Teacher's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 7,793
Senior Member
Be careful with e-mails...
Old 09-21-2019, 05:02 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #4

Our principal preferred we contact parents by phone or have a conference. E-mails could become part of litigation should the parents decide to take the district to court, especially in special education situations. It is definitely frustrating, but these are the times we live in now.
NJ Teacher is offline   Reply With Quote
KetchupChips KetchupChips is online now
 
Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 92
Full Member

KetchupChips
 
Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 92
Full Member

Old 09-21-2019, 05:15 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #5

! I had a principal that had no clue how to discipline and gave in to parents. They loved him. Guess what my nickname was for him? Spineless! But only said to DH.

Although its hard, I agree about finding something good to say. Even if you have to stretch the truth a bit. The other strategy I learned to do was make it about helping the student. I had a difficult student who would stand on the commode and yell. When I wrote to the parents, I phrased it as a safety issue. If Johnny were to fall off, Im scared that he will really get hurt! They answered that they would talk to him immediately and thanks for letting them know.

Try to hang in there and take it one day at a time. Unfortunately, weve all had years like that. Hugs to you.


KetchupChips is online now   Reply With Quote
faligagging
 
 
Guest

faligagging
 
 
Guest

Old 09-21-2019, 06:11 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #6

I don't agree with some of the replies you have gotten. Your P is micromanaging! It is just that simple. They should trust your professionalism and judgement but they don't bc they don't want complaining parents or students. They want everybody completely happy.


If this was a school report I would make sure the student had positive remarks. However, as I understand your professional evaluation of this child had a completely different purpose. The parent wants to have it both ways, and is too stupid to understand that you are to be honest in your answers to help them get the correct diagnosis for their child.

I once was in your position, kind of. I had a high school girl who wanted my professional opinion/type questionnaire sent/fax to her doctor. Number one there was absolutely nothing wrong with her. Having your parents getting a divorce is not an excuse to get on disability. Lastly, I didn't feel comfortable lying for this child. I felt awful and angry that I was placed in this position by faculty members and the p pressuring me into writing/choosing answers that would help this child get a check from SSA and help from the school. I felt deeply sorry about her dad getting a divorce too. I tried to pass the documentation to her sympathizer in our faculty but I was quickly told I was obligated to complete it. I was told the documentation was completely anonymous. It wasn't, I had to leave a copy in the office and then they discussed it with the student and parents and so on.

This is one of the reasons I was non renewed at my school. I completely understand that this is not completely your situation. I thought that I may throw this out here to say: "yes it can get worse."
  Reply With Quote
PrivateEyes's Avatar
PrivateEyes PrivateEyes is online now
 
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 3,822
Blog Entries: 5
Senior Member

PrivateEyes
 
PrivateEyes's Avatar
 
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 3,822
Senior Member
I agree
Old 09-21-2019, 06:56 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #7

You should probably avoid sending emails. A) then you don't have to CC the principal. B) Emails often come off as harsher than we intend it to be.

While I'm sure it's absolutely true that his behavior makes it difficult to teach, I wouldn't have put that in an email or verbalized it to the parents. It would be much better to express your concerns as it how his behavior is impacting his own learning.

And even though you were listing behaviors for the doctor, you would be wise to add something positive to each message you send a parent. You want the parents to see you as a caring, competent teacher who has their child's best interests at heart. That's not going to be apparent with a bald list of bad behaviors.
PrivateEyes is online now   Reply With Quote
Kinderkr4zy's Avatar
Kinderkr4zy Kinderkr4zy is offline
 
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,445
Senior Member

Kinderkr4zy
 
Kinderkr4zy's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,445
Senior Member

Old 09-21-2019, 07:29 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #8

I get what you are saying and why you are frustrated. You didnt do anything wrong, but to keep off the "naughty list" here are some things that I use to be able to have something nice to say-even about kids who genuinely DO NOT garner any compliments of any kind:

He/She is:

1. Creative (well the string of curses coming from his mouth were quite creative indeed, and the lies he comes up with-even though they are not at all believable they are creative)
2. excited by technology (aka he will go to computers without refusing and needing an escort)
3. athletic (he enjoys playing-or he is really fast when he elopes out the door-or what a pitching arm when he throws things at me)
4. collaborative (well he wont do any work but, when he is partnered with someone he talks a lot)
5. has boundless energy that will serve him well when we find a way to channel it (no explanation required I think)
6. artistic (aka-always drawing on her notebook-since I already took away her white board)
7. very expressive/great oral narratives so when we get him to put all those big ideas into his writing its going to be fantastic (yeah he argues, throws fits, and tells me a whole victimized and fictional version of how I am a monster and he plans to destroy me, but it could still count as an oral narrative right?)


I send positive emails to ALL parents twice a trimester whether they deserve them or not-just so parents cant say I never take time to tell them anything positive about their child. I have learned to be very (1.) creative myself.

Last edited by Kinderkr4zy; 09-22-2019 at 01:13 PM..
Kinderkr4zy is offline   Reply With Quote
desert flower's Avatar
desert flower desert flower is offline
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,874
Senior Member

desert flower
 
desert flower's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,874
Senior Member
Kinder
Old 09-21-2019, 10:41 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #9

These are great!
desert flower is offline   Reply With Quote
caseycat caseycat is offline
 
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 51
Junior Member

caseycat
 
Joined: Oct 2017
Posts: 51
Junior Member
Ssi
Old 09-24-2019, 09:13 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #10

teacher reports are supposed to be anonymous. They are sent directly to SSI through a fax. No parent or other should have access to that document. That was totally wrong and could be a legal issue if someone wanted it to be.


caseycat is offline   Reply With Quote
ih8's Avatar
ih8 ih8 is offline
 
Joined: Sep 2019
Posts: 21
New Member

ih8
 
ih8's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2019
Posts: 21
New Member

Old 09-29-2019, 06:19 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #11

I can't believe a principal has that much free time that she can read and correct every email a teacher send a parent! There is definitely something wrong here. Perhaps you should ask her to come and model a lesson for you since she obviously has not much to do.
ih8 is offline   Reply With Quote

Join the conversation! Post as a guest or become a member today. New members welcome!

Reply

 

>
The VENT
Thread Tools




Sign Up Now

Sign Up FREE | ProTeacher Help | BusyBoard

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 10:15 AM.

Copyright © 2019 ProTeacher®
For individual use only. Do not copy, reproduce or transmit.
source: www.proteacher.net