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mhugs mhugs is online now
 
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Preplanning Funeral
Old 12-05-2018, 05:28 PM
 
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We had an appointment at the funeral home to discuss our funeral plans. Wow, it costs a lot to die...sticker shock.


So I just was checking price of urns on Amazon-yes they have them. At the side it said Condition: New, Refurbished, USED and I split a gut laughing.


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Old 12-05-2018, 07:01 PM
 
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Quote:
So I just was checking price of urns on Amazon-yes they have them. At the side it said Condition: New, Refurbished, USED and I split a gut laughing.
USED? REFURBISHED? Good grief I'm having some horrible images come to mind.

We haven't planned our funerals but it's something we need to address. I don't want my family to spend $$$ and think it will be easier on everyone if we choose our own used or refurbished urn.
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Old 12-05-2018, 07:53 PM
 
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Well, I have a different take on it. Here businesses change and/or disappear. Iíve told my kids what I want and they can arrange it with money I leave them. It was very easy for me to make arrangements for DH at the time.
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Old 12-05-2018, 08:17 PM
 
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We havenít done that, but my mom had her casket picked out and paid for (burial site and headstone was in place already) as well as a burial trust at the funeral home to cover nearly all the costs. She really had very little money when she passed away. It was such a nice gift she did for us, making the planning so much easier.
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It is a blessing when it is preplanned
Old 12-06-2018, 01:48 AM
 
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My mother told us what she wanted read at the funeral. She gave us a quote, Bible verses and an Irish blessing. She also left a list of a few hymns that we could select from for music. She had preselected a couple of pictures of herself to display at the service. One was of her as a young lady and one a more mature woman. She chose pall bearers and gave us choices there as well in case someone could not attend. We also knew what her headstone would look like.

Anyway it was wonderful to not have to make those decisions when grieving. It also was comforting that she received the upbeat service that she wanted.


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Good Article on Ways to Save
Old 12-06-2018, 04:24 AM
 
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https://www.marketwatch.com/story/7-...sts-2014-03-27

The funeral home may not have told you these helpful hints.


I hope you can make these decisions in a matter that brings you comfort and they will fit your finances.
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funerals
Old 12-06-2018, 07:02 AM
 
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After reading the Ways to Save article, it reminded me my FIL's service. The funeral home wanted to charge a hefty fee for the recorded music. The DH and his sibs declined. Who knew you'd have to pay for the music that plays over the intercom! There are so many hidden fees that grieving families miss!
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Funeral expenses
Old 12-06-2018, 09:12 AM
 
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There was a story about taxing caskets on our local news last night and featured in the story was an urn which had a price tag of over $900.00!! Canít we just grab something at a flower shop or TJ Maxx to throw the ashes in? Is that legal? I do remember years ago when MIL died how the funeral home tried to sell my FIL pens and a sign in book. He was very good at saying ďno thanksĒ. I will also leave directives such as cremate us but I am not buying anything now.
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I know that my father's ashes
Old 12-06-2018, 12:29 PM
 
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were in a simple wooden box. So that could still be possible.

I have told my family that I do not want a funeral. I would like my body to be donated to the Body Farm in VA. ( if you don't know what that is, it is a type of forensic lab.) It would please me to think that by studying my body it may help them solve a crime for another family) This image is rather yucky to many, so I would not put it in my will just let family know and let them do what is best for everyone.

I really wanted to be buried in a pod with a tree planted above, but that is not legal in the US yet.
https://www.cnn.com/2017/05/03/world...ndi/index.html
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Ways to have cremation performed
Old 12-06-2018, 12:52 PM
 
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https://www.sciencecare.com/understa...ost-cremation/

I found this information valuable. I never thought there were so many options. I also did not realize that if you donate your body to science you are still cremated at some point and the ashes are returned to the family. Looks like this is free.


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Old 12-06-2018, 03:37 PM
 
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If you are thinking about different kinds of urns, consider what you plan to ultimately do with the urn and ashes, and check regulations in your state. If you plan to keep the deceasedís remains on your mantel, you can probably do whatever you like.

When my mom was cremated, we were able to bury her ashes in a Memory Garden at her church. They just gave us a trowel, and we dug a little hole and poured her ashes in. A trillium grew up in the spot where her ashes were buried. Trilliums were her favorite flower, so that was happy. She had a nice wooden box with an opaque stained glass top, made by a friend. This was in MI.

When we were planning dhís funeral, he was thinking about making his own urn. We planned to have his ashes buried at a local cemetery. There were a bunch of regulations about the urn if it was going to be buried there. We ended up buying an urn when he passed. It was very simple, but not cheap.

There are laws in many places prohibiting scattering ashes...but I wonder how many folks are aware of that. Seems like most people think you can just scatter ashes wherever you like...(and how would anyone catch you, anyway?). But it is good to be aware of any relevant laws where you are.
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Spreading ashes
Old 12-06-2018, 04:13 PM
 
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Many folks in this area just head to the Atlantic and dump the ashes overboard. My cousin did this with his dad. Ask forgiveness rather than permission?? Sounds good to me!
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Old 12-12-2018, 12:59 PM
 
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I want to do this the article says itís legal in North America. Iíve heard about it itís quite popular in California
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