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Old 05-26-2014, 05:09 PM
  #1

My son, 20, is home from college and so is his friend. His friend has been acting strange, as my son says, delusional. He's talking angry and not making sense. He was kicked out of college in Dec, went back during the year. I don't know, didn't get a straight story...but there is def something wrong mentally with this kid. I told my ds NOT to hang out with him as I'm afraid his erratic angry delusional beh will cause him to do something crazy. There are so many things like this in the news. Anyway, my ds wants to tell his mom, but anonymously. He doesn't want the kid to know he said something cause one thing the kid said was "everyone's always in my face" My ds showed me some of the emails he sent and yes, they don't make sense. I think he should do something before the kid flips, but how and what?

DS said that he thinks his mom is in denial that anything is wrong. I say she MUST see this too!!? I would think!


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Old 05-26-2014, 05:17 PM
  #2

I would say something to the mom. Maybe you can call her? That's scary!
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Old 05-26-2014, 05:21 PM
  #3

Can you go to the police and let them know what is happening? I know it is hard to do, but if it is so bad it might be better to lay it in their laps and let them handle.
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Tell!
Old 05-26-2014, 05:49 PM
  #4

Having a son who has dealt with mental issues, I definitely say tell. Since he is over 18, however, not much can be done if he is not considered a threat to himself or others. Hopefully, his family can encourage him to get some help.
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As tough as it is....
Old 05-26-2014, 06:00 PM
  #5

I would definitely contact her. There are many factors to consider, but I know as a parent, if another parent called me with observations and concerns about my child, I'd take it seriously. If it's possible to get her the emails, that would be helpful too. Some mental health issues have been shown to start in young adulthood. I'm not saying it's anything like that because only a doctor or mental health professionals can diagnose something like that, but if this child needs help, he may be unable to do anything about it for himself. Plus, it seemingly takes so long to get anyone help or support. Doing something because you care is not a bad thing.


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Old 05-26-2014, 06:11 PM
  #6

if she's in denial, maybe hearing from a peer would make her realize...but then she might not be able to keep his identity a secret.

Maybe just go to the police.
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Old 05-26-2014, 07:37 PM
  #7

I agree - she definitely needs to know! Not only could he be a danger to others, he could also be a danger to himself!

Nancy

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Old 05-27-2014, 04:53 AM
  #8

It could be nothing, but if he ended up hurting himself or others you might wish you had (not that you would hold any responsibility!).

Another way to look at this is protecting your son- he cares about his friend and if friend does something while your son is with him- it could cause trouble for your son too (again, not that your son would be responsible- but guilty by association).

Not sure how to approach this with the mother, it won't be easy. Maybe tell her what you have seen and try to leave your son out of it.
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I agree,
Old 05-27-2014, 07:07 AM
  #9

you most definitely need to tell. It could change/save his life.
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Old 05-27-2014, 09:04 AM
  #10

I had to make that call a few years ago...
DS' friend came to sleepover, ended up spending a week with us. At the end of the week, my son asked me to take friend back to his home...Long story short, the mom was in denial but she said that my phone call was a wake-up call. It gave her the little extra something that she needed to go to therapy (both mother and son)and in a matter of months, move on, resign from job, move to another state. Last I heard, she remarried and kid has a great job that he likes!

your calling could make a huge difference in this kid's life!


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Old 05-27-2014, 09:43 AM
  #11

20 is a critical age for mental illnesses such as schizophrenia.

I would alert the police.
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