I have a big 5th grade class. I have 3 or 4 super rude kids who try to run the show in the classroom, by the rude things they say. (Example: gum chewing is not allowed in my room. When I caught 2 kids chewing gum, they said in a smug way: Well, if my parents say I can chew gum, then can I?) This insolence is VERY new to me, and I've been teaching for awhile.
Another example: I was getting the kids to get ready for their Wellness Break (like a recess that's a school-wide thing). One boy says in a smug way so everyone can hear: 'Well, I'm starting recess now.' He says something like this most every day.
I want to build relationship with my kids but CANNOT stand this attempt to belittle me. My admin does not help; I'm on my own. I will have a conference with the parents this week, but this child is quite the ring leader, and many kids think it's funny. He's hard for me to like, and I HATE that since it's so important to me to have a good relationship with all my students.
Some more background: I took FMLA leave for 3 months at the beginning of the year. The long-term sub had more of a party situation than a learning situation. I've been back since the end of October, and am wondering if he is resentful of my level of rigor.
Unfortunately, several kids are rude. He is a ring leader, but other kids jump in too.
Yesterday we were reading a biography. We were discussing character traits and the discussion of a leader vs a follower came up. I gave them examples and then had them come up with some examples. I was shocked when some of them brought up the fact they are followers! We had a great conversation and it seemed like some attitudes changed. I noticed attitudes changed as the day went by. I even heard one follower say, “I’m being a follower and that’s not smart right now.”Maybe you can change some of your followers into leaders and take some of the power away from the rude ones.
They aren’t acting like high schoolers. They are acting like middle schoolers. God love them. They don’t have good sense. Call them out on their bad behavior.
They likely are protesting being reigned in by a new teacher. I have noticed that anytime a teacher isn’t there from the first of the year, it is harder to establish their authority.
Getting the power from the ring leader is possible. Keep at it.
[QUOTEThey aren’t acting like high schoolers. They are acting like middle schoolers][/QUOTE]
Exactly my thought! The rudeness and disrespect seems to get worse with each new year. The previous posters have some good suggestions. I wish I had a solution, but it’s a constant battle. Good luck!
You say he is the ringleader, but is it likely his parents will have the most influence? I would start with tackling the kids who are part of it and whose parents will have the strongest influence. If it won't be his parents then you get enough on your side and on top of their kids about behavior that they won't be joining in the ringleader antics.
Yes, kids are definitely little narcissistic smart asses and they wouldn't be if their parents weren't either. We all know where they get it from, so I don't know how much help you'll get from them either. A kind, genuine, moral, sincere, humble, modest, respectable parent would instill those values in their kids. That's why I never cared to teach in the first place, but kind of fell into it and am no longer in it anymore.
Not once ever in my entire life from pre-school to college did I ever dream of disobeying or talking back to any teacher. That thought never even entered my mind. I never gave ANY teacher nor my parents one bit of trouble at all. These kids today and in the last couple of decades or so are really something!
People in society in general though are more smug (I use that word a lot too), entitled, narcissistic, imposing, attention-starving, and unkind these days anyway. It's the change of the times and I can't stand it.
find a book where the class villain acts like the ringleader, and weave it into character ed. I start most classes with an expectation that I'm not teaching for the excellent pay and working conditions, but that I feel that they are worth my time and effort because I believe that they are extraordinarily valuable, and you don't trash things that are valuable. (if you had a $250k Ford GT would you trash it? or take care of it?, usually they agree that they would care for it, and they I explain how they as unique individuals are more valuable than all cars ever built.) I will not tolerate them disrespecting others, and especially themselves. usually the class will self-police, 'hey? you are disrespecting yourself" knock it off. if that does not happen and they still smart off I come down pretty hard as if they had disrespected another classmate. while I will not purposely embarrass a student, I usually wont stand in the way of a cocky one doing it to themselves. I know its late in the year, and they are ready to move on, but its probably still salvageable. hang in there.
All I can do is relate how hard it is when you have had to be out on FML or for any other reason at the start of a yr. The kids have established w/ the sub the behaviors allowed and they can be way different than the teacher's expectations.
It is really hard to reign them back in when they see it as they were there 1st. I wish you the best of luck!
On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer is a great Newbery prize winning book. It's a quick read. Start reading it on Monday and you'll probably finish by Friday. It has more than one theme, but one is making poor decisions to follow a brash, mouthy "leader". It will generate lots of discussions.
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02-06-2019, 09:43 PM
