What an enabler! I can't believe this happened. - ProTeacher Community




Home Join Now Search My Favorites
Help


      The VENT

What an enabler! I can't believe this happened.

>

Reply
 
Thread Tools
nucleus's Avatar
nucleus nucleus is online now
 
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 5,490
Senior Member

nucleus
 
nucleus's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 5,490
Senior Member
What an enabler! I can't believe this happened.
Old 05-18-2016, 07:46 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #1

We went to a local ball game and took all students that didn't have any discipline referrals all year.

Two brothers had multiple referrals so of course they were not allowed to go. The mom didn't send them to school and bought tickets to the game for her boys and two cousins. What a crock! What a message to send to these kids! They got in trouble throughout the year and didn't deserve the reward, but got the reward anyway. The tickets are only $10 so it's not very expensive, but she was willing to spend $50 on tickets just so her kids could go to the game and basically rub it in everyone's face.

I really liked and respected this mom. Not anymore.


nucleus is online now   Reply With Quote

kahluablast's Avatar
kahluablast kahluablast is offline
 
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 21,087
Senior Member

kahluablast
 
kahluablast's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 21,087
Senior Member

Old 05-18-2016, 07:49 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #2

It is just crazy what parents think are good lessons to teach their kids. Crazy.
kahluablast is offline   Reply With Quote
teenytiny's Avatar
teenytiny teenytiny is offline
 
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,342
Senior Member

teenytiny
 
teenytiny's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 5,342
Senior Member

Old 05-18-2016, 08:29 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #3

Yep, you can see why these boys have had multiple referrals all year- they are never held accountable for their actions.

Well, it'll bite this mom in the butt over the long term. They'll be living in her basement at 30 because they won't be able to manage living in the world.
teenytiny is offline   Reply With Quote
all41's Avatar
all41 all41 is offline
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,566
Senior Member

all41
 
all41's Avatar
 
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 2,566
Senior Member
Same thing
Old 05-19-2016, 03:25 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #4

Happened with one of my students earlier this year. There really isn't much you could do as it is a public place. However, in my case the enabling mom worked at our school. She took the day off, called school and said mini muffin was 'not going to be in school today ' with no other explanation. And low and behold they show up at the same venue.😠

Since she was an employee, I think principal and superintendent talked to her about setting good examples and consistency in expectations for ALL students.

I think the student received an unexcused absence for the day.
all41 is offline   Reply With Quote
Sadams97
 
 
Guest

Sadams97
 
 
Guest
Happens all of the time
Old 05-19-2016, 04:51 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #5

I see it all of the time: spoiled kids whose parents tell them that their teachers are completely out of line for expecting them to follow any kind of rules. I guess it isn't too surprising considering that our profession has been on the receiving end of a massive smear campaign by the media, politicians, and hedge fund billionaires. No wonder our credibility has been completely destroyed in the minds of the public.


  Reply With Quote
javamomma's Avatar
javamomma javamomma is offline
 
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 13,989
Senior Member

javamomma
 
javamomma's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 13,989
Senior Member
Done that
Old 05-19-2016, 05:19 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #6

Had a student years ago not get to go to zoo on field trip. What did grandma do? Took him to zoo so he could walk around and wave at friends

That is so wrong for your student as well!
javamomma is offline   Reply With Quote
LastMinute123 LastMinute123 is online now
 
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,084
Senior Member

LastMinute123
 
Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,084
Senior Member

Old 05-19-2016, 07:11 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #7

I used to do one of those 'earn your reward' systems with ice cream sundaes. Everyone started with ice cream, then they earned fudge, whipped cream, sprinkles, etc. every time they 'passed' a level in math. I sent lots of notices home, gave them tons of practice time in school, extra help/encouragement to kids who weren't progressing, etc. They had MONTHS to do this, so anyone who was motivated could earn as much as they wanted. Some of the lower-functioning kids managed to earn everything by sheer determination.

A less-motivated kid fluffed around and earned about nothing. His mom came to the celebration, tried to serve him everything anyway, and then left early with him to take him out for ice cream when I re-stated the system to her.

That's okay, Mom. You'll be the one supporting him through adulthood. I just want to give him a leg up in learning to use small goals to get to a big one....You know, like we do in life?
LastMinute123 is online now   Reply With Quote
Mrs. Bee's Avatar
Mrs. Bee Mrs. Bee is offline
 
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 90
Full Member

Mrs. Bee
 
Mrs. Bee's Avatar
 
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 90
Full Member
Unfortunate
Old 05-19-2016, 08:18 AM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #8

I think we've all been there, and that's precisely the reason those kids act up, because of the lack of consequences. We took our group who read and turned in their reading logs to a local baseball game, and the same kind of thing happened. The ones who didn't read stayed back to work. So, two of mine who didn't get the reading done mysteriously got sick and didn't show up. And one of them told me the day before, that his mom said he didn't have to show up.

Thank goodness there are plenty of people who look at things differently and do the right thing. And you must always focus on those people.
Mrs. Bee is offline   Reply With Quote
ConnieWI ConnieWI is offline
 
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,120
Senior Member

ConnieWI
 
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 7,120
Senior Member
You Deserve to Vent
Old 05-19-2016, 12:25 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #9

Unfortunately, if I were in your shoes, I would not be able to let this go!!! This parent needs to know her actions have consequences!!!

However, rather than having the much needed "get your act together as a parent" conversation face-to-face with this moron of a parent, I would type a letter, not sign it, and mail it from another community so the postmark does not reflect your community.

The letter would say exactly what I want to say to her face!!!

She needs to know she is not doing her children a favor...her parenting skills need improvement...she is a poor example of a adult!!!

JMHO...
ConnieWI is offline   Reply With Quote
RealisticPreK RealisticPreK is offline
 
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 555
Senior Member

RealisticPreK
 
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 555
Senior Member

Old 05-19-2016, 03:16 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #10

Make sure your fingerprints are not on the anonymous letter if you do send it!


RealisticPreK is offline   Reply With Quote
Zia's Avatar
Zia Zia is offline
 
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 17,007
Senior Member

Zia
 
Zia's Avatar
 
Joined: Jan 2015
Posts: 17,007
Senior Member

Old 05-19-2016, 07:40 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #11

I don't think anonymous hate mail will change this parent's future actions. Just my opinion.
Zia is offline   Reply With Quote
jcbsmom jcbsmom is offline
 
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 754
Senior Member

jcbsmom
 
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 754
Senior Member
My situation
Old 05-21-2016, 05:13 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #12

Many years ago I had a student wrap his belt around the neck of a second grader and start to pick him up before someone stopped him. Due to this action I told the mom I was not taking Snowflake on a field trip. She of course complained to the principal who, get this, agreed that I was being too harsh on Snowflake. Well, long story short, Snowflake was "sick" the day of the field trip.
Flash forward to last year. There on the local news was Snowflake. He was arrested along with a number of other poor misunderstood young men for running a drug ring, burglary and other felony crimes.
jcbsmom is offline   Reply With Quote
BayAreaSub BayAreaSub is offline
 
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,141
Senior Member

BayAreaSub
 
Joined: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,141
Senior Member
Hmmm...
Old 05-21-2016, 05:47 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #13

Usually I find that students who need to stay at school in these situations have work they are given to do while they spend the day on campus. If you wanted to be really snarky, I suppose you could make the brothers complete that work next week. Recess and lunchtime sounds like it would work.
BayAreaSub is offline   Reply With Quote
Summerwillcom's Avatar
Summerwillcom Summerwillcom is offline
 
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 3,210
Senior Member

Summerwillcom
 
Summerwillcom's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 3,210
Senior Member
The parent will pay for their
Old 05-21-2016, 07:10 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #14

actions eventually if that is any help...I think we may have been lied to here..lol We were told that you are not allowed to withhold a field trip from a kid due to bad behavior. WE were told that all trips planned during school time have to have an educational value to them and that legally you are not allowed to withhold an educational experience from a kid. Does any1 know if we've been lied to for yrs? lol It wouldn't be the 1st time...lol
Summerwillcom is offline   Reply With Quote
nucleus's Avatar
nucleus nucleus is online now
 
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 5,490
Senior Member

nucleus
 
nucleus's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 5,490
Senior Member

Old 05-22-2016, 06:31 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #15

This is a trip for any student that hasn't had a referral all year. The only educational value of this trip is that kids really do want to earn the trip so classroom behavior is better which leads to better learning. Now don't get me wrong... the hard core cases could care less but for those borderline kids...it's helped.
nucleus is online now   Reply With Quote
Summerwillcom's Avatar
Summerwillcom Summerwillcom is offline
 
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 3,210
Senior Member

Summerwillcom
 
Summerwillcom's Avatar
 
Joined: Jun 2014
Posts: 3,210
Senior Member
I understand that it is for those who behaved
Old 05-23-2016, 01:35 PM
 
Clip to ScrapBook #16

, but we have been told we can't do reward field trips ( unless everyone goes) on "school time." We were quoted some law on it...and had to stop doing these types of outings. Sometimes,I think someone makes stuff up to stop what we are doing...
Summerwillcom is offline   Reply With Quote

Join the conversation! Post as a guest or become a member today. New members welcome!

Reply

 

>
The VENT
Thread Tools




Sign Up Now

Sign Up FREE | ProTeacher Help | BusyBoard

All times are GMT -8. The time now is 02:45 PM.

Copyright © 2019 ProTeacher®
For individual use only. Do not copy, reproduce or transmit.
source: www.proteacher.net