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getting pregnant later in life
Old 06-18-2019, 07:00 PM
  #1

My husband and I didn't want kids when we were younger for various reasons, but now we would like to try. I am a month away from being 39 and he'll be 40 in the Fall. I know it's not unheard of for couples to have kids at this age, but I am open to any advice or words of caution.



I am weaning myself off my depression and anxiety meds and my BC pill will run out in about two weeks. We also bought an ovulation test today. Scary, but exciting!


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Old 06-18-2019, 07:02 PM
  #2

That’s so exciting. Good luck.

My college roommate and her DH just adopted a baby and she’s 42.
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Have a friend
Old 06-18-2019, 07:28 PM
  #3

who had a baby at 42 or 43. Everything went fine with the pregnancy. She gave birth to a healthy little boy. No reason why that can't happen to you as well. Wishing you the best with this next chapter of your life.
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:31 PM
  #4

That's exciting! I wish you best of luck One of my bffs conceived at 39 or 40 and has a lovely 7-8 year old daughter now (I can't remember hold old- I can barely remember how old my own kids are )
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Old 06-18-2019, 07:34 PM
  #5

Congrats on your exciting decision! We adopted our newborn DD when I was 40 and DH was 47! If we had it to do all over again we would do it in a heartbeat!

Nancy


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pregnancy
Old 06-18-2019, 07:39 PM
  #6

A teacher friend is 46 and has a beautiful 7 month old baby boy. Another friend had her baby at 42. A few weeks ago I met a woman who is 45 and the mother of two and she is due on Sunday. Her husband is an OB-GYN who sees more women having babies after 40.
I know a woman in my neighborhood who is a doctor and who gave birth at 50 to a healthy baby. The baby is now a happy irrepressible 3 years old.

Wishing you the best of luck.
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Getting pregnant later in life
Old 06-18-2019, 07:43 PM
  #7

Thank you all! I feel all of the PT love!

Quick question. For those of you who adopted, did you find it harder to conceive when you got older? Sorry if that’s intrusive. Don’t answer if it’s too hard to talk about.
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Old 06-18-2019, 08:02 PM
  #8

Jumping in here...DH and I had a surprise baby after several years of trying. I was 39 w/ my first one, and after DS1 was born, I knew I wanted just one more. DS2 was born shortly before my 41st birthday. Both pregnancies were textbook, with easy deliveries.

I got pregnant with DS2 the first month we tried, thanks to a marvelous book, “Taking Charge of Your Fertility”. IMO, every woman should have a copy, regardless of whether she’s trying to get pregnant or not. I thought I was very knowledgeable about my body, but I learned so much from this book. I understand the author now also has a website, which wasn’t available 20 years ago. Check it out, and good luck to you and DH!

ETA: I found out I wasn’t ovulating every month, which is why it took so long the first time. I was also missing some important indicators that my body was giving me to let me know my fertile times.
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Old 06-18-2019, 08:28 PM
  #9

I was 40 when I got pregnant with my youngest and 41 when he was born.

I would suggest you see a ob-gyn and discuss your plans.
The dr may have advice and suggestions/alternatives for the medications you are currently taking.
The dr may also have suggestions for medications that will "jump start" so to speak your ovaries/ovulation.

Good luck.
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Old 06-18-2019, 08:31 PM
  #10

Had 7 kiddos, the 7th when she was 41. That baby brother of mine, who is 48, is a gift to the world! Best wishes to you - my children are my greatest accomplishments/joys. Sending hope your way.


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Old 06-18-2019, 08:59 PM
  #11

This is such an exciting decision! I knew I wanted children, but after two years of trying, DH and I came to grips with the fact that we would never have children. Of course, that’s when I got pregnant! I was 39 and delivered a beautiful baby boy two months after turning 40. My pregnancy was blissful and perfect- even when I was still pregnant at 42 weeks. Labor and delivery aren’t what I would call blissful for any woman, but the result is so worth it. The only thing I would change is that I do wish we had tried for another when I was 41. But we didn’t and are thrilled to be parents to a great boy!

Good luck!
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Old 06-18-2019, 10:17 PM
  #12

Quote:
I got pregnant with DS2 the first month we tried, thanks to a marvelous book, “Taking Charge of Your Fertility”. IMO, every woman should have a copy, regardless of whether she’s trying to get pregnant or not. I thought I was very knowledgeable about my body, but I learned so much from this book. I understand the author now also has a website, which wasn’t available 20 years ago.
I am a HUGE fan of this book as well!! It taught me so much about my body. I considered giving it as a high school graduation gift to every young woman I know I'm pretty sure the website was available about 18 years ago, because I remember it being around when I was not yet pregnant with #2. You must have just missed it (Of course, maybe my pregnancy brain is mixed up, but I'm sure it was around at least 16 years ago for my third kid if not my second...)

The book is here: https://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge.../dp/0060881909 Looks like it's been around since 1996. The website is here: https://www.tcoyf.com
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Old 06-19-2019, 01:33 AM
  #13

Quote:
Quick question. For those of you who adopted, did you find it harder to conceive when you got older? Sorry if that’s intrusive. Don’t answer if it’s too hard to talk about.
We never tried to conceive. When we married (2nd marriage for me), I was already over 35 and was pretty certain I had fertility issues. Frankly, I didn't want a birth child so badly that I was willing to spend the time, money and energy on fertility treatments. So we went straight to adoption. When our first kiddo joined us, I was 43. She was supposed to be the only one because we were too old to have more than one kid. Long story short, we now have four DKs. We are tired and broke but so very blessed.
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Pregnancy
Old 06-19-2019, 02:35 AM
  #14

Lots of luck with your choice! I’m 39 and currently pregnant with my first child. I got tired of waiting for “Mr Right” and decided to become a single mom by choice. Definitely reach out to your doctor to discuss your plan. Good luck to you!
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Old 06-19-2019, 05:11 AM
  #15

My parents met later in life than most. 2-3 yrs after they got married, they had me. My mom was 36 and dad was 46. My mom said they would have had more if they were younger. My mom was really thinking she was going to have twins.

I'm already 44 and fiance's 45, so as each month passes, I guess the chances of us having any kids are bleak. I would have maybe liked to have had one child...guess it's not in the cards for us. We never tried to get pregnant and it would be interesting to see how fast/easy it would be, but we're not going to try just to see that!
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Pregnant at 39
Old 06-19-2019, 05:18 AM
  #16

but we did IVF. I had my first son at 33, got pregnant with him no problem. When we decided to go for number 2, we tried for 2 years and it just wasn't happening (I did get pregnant, but lost it). I was turning 40 this year, and thankfully my insurance covered IVF, so we went for it. I am 11 weeks with a baby girl. Good luck on your journey!
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I had my first at 37, second at 39
Old 06-19-2019, 05:59 AM
  #17

and everything was fine, though I did see at the top of my chart at doctor's office one day the words, "Elderly pregnancy!"

We have a friend who had her first at age 46! It's all good!

You will do fine!
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Old 06-19-2019, 06:32 AM
  #18

50 years ago, my mom was a month shy of 43 and my dad was 45, and they had me. It was not common at all for those 40+ to have babies. How things have changed!

Two of my sisters were 39-42 when they had babies. Only precautions they had to take were monitoring for gestational diabetes and prenatal vitamins with extra iron, as GD and low iron become a bigger risk for an "older" pregnant woman.

You can do this!
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Old 06-19-2019, 08:24 AM
  #19

Quote:
"Elderly pregnancy!"


DD had her second one at 35 and her chart said "advanced maternal age."
It could be worse. Pregnancies of women over 35 used to be called "geriatric" pregnancies.
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getting pregnant later in life
Old 06-19-2019, 08:43 AM
  #20

Thank you all so much! I did meet with doctor a few weeks ago. He said to use the ovulation kit and to check back with him in 6 months if we don't conceive.

And I appreciate the suggestion of the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility". I check at the library and it's there, so I'll pick it up soon.

I will keep you all posted!
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Old 06-19-2019, 10:28 AM
  #21

My high school best friend swore she'd never have kids. At age 37 after ten years of marriage, she changed her mind. Three times! It can be done! Best wishes to you both!
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Old 06-19-2019, 10:57 AM
  #22

Go for it. Questions to ask yourself what will you do if they tell you it is Down syndrome or probable. They told us that but we lucked out. They will try to tell you to abort it. We did amino test that showed normal but it was scary. Google a bunch and decide what’s right for you before you decide to get pregnant.
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Old 06-19-2019, 11:33 AM
  #23

Good luck to you! I just had my baby and will turn 38 next month. One of the perks about being “advanced maternal age” is more frequent monitoring of the baby.

I would suggest to start taking prenatal vitamins now to start getting that folic acid in your body.
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Old 06-19-2019, 06:35 PM
  #24

My husband and I didn’t meet until our mid thirties and have been married for three years this August. We are in a similar situation. I’m 39 and he is 38. We are going to start trying soon. My doctor said no reason to think I would have problems however with age increased risk of a miscarriage. I’m nervous how much life will change! 🙂
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Old 06-19-2019, 06:41 PM
  #25

Good luck!! You may have to "jump through a few more hoops" to get pregnant and throughout your pregnancy, but having a child is worth it if you want one.
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Exciting!
Old 06-21-2019, 07:00 AM
  #26

I had my second child recently at almost 39. No complications, everything was great. It did say "geriatric pregnancy" on my paperwork, which cracked me up. Best of luck!
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