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Old 12-22-2019, 07:26 PM
  #1

DD15 wrote out one of my checks, forged my name, and it cleared the bank. I am so livid. Thank god it was only for $15. When we confronted her she said it was just for fun. She also refuses to give me the book of checks back. I am so afraid she wrote more out.

Tomorrow I get to close the account and contact the police. Grrrr...


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Old 12-22-2019, 07:30 PM
  #2

I'm so sorry 3rdgradequeen.
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Holy #%^@#!
Old 12-22-2019, 07:39 PM
  #3

I am so LIVID for you!

She is clearly showing that she has zero respect for you or for boundaries. Life needs to get tough and get tough fast.

Since she's refusing to give you the checks, I'd go all sorts of crazy on her butt.

Does she have a cell phone that you pay for? Cut it off. Effective immediately.
Does she have her own bedroom? Take out all the extras.
Does she do sports? Dance? Instruments? Any of those extras? No more.

She needs to realize the seriousness of her actions.

Good luck to you!
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Old 12-22-2019, 07:42 PM
  #4

That's awful! I'm sorry you're going through this. Surely your daughter must know the possible consequences for keeping your checkbook, and of course forging a check. A family member of my husband's keeps her important things,.such as her checkbooks under lock and key because her son has done similar to her several times.
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Old 12-22-2019, 07:48 PM
  #5

She won't give you the checks back? Ha! She'd have a bed and a blanket, no cell phone, no payment for activities. She'd get food I cooked and served. She'd make her own lunch or go hungry.

I would lick up all my valuables...jewelry, checks, etc. Can't be trusted!

She would be in counseling ASAP!

I am so very sorry you are dealing with this!!!!


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Old 12-22-2019, 08:47 PM
  #6

Iím sorry you have to deal with this. Itís good that you are contacting the police. She has some hard lessons to learn but it sounds like she will be difficult to get through to.
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Old 12-22-2019, 09:04 PM
  #7

It might be wise to close the account and reopen another checking account. Hard telling what might be done with the missing checks.

How awful not to be able to trust your own child. (I went through similar things with one of mine.)
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Old 12-22-2019, 11:11 PM
  #8

I'm sorry you have this stress.
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Good advice
Old 12-23-2019, 12:25 AM
  #9

Closing the account is smart. If that does not work stop payment on that series of checks. My bank charged a flat fee of about ten dollars when I lost part of a pad of checks. I would ground her over break. She would do nothing fun, unless it was a family event. She would be with an adult as much as possible. How stressful for you. Keep us posted.
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Nope
Old 12-23-2019, 02:59 AM
  #10

I'm not sure how old she is, but what are the consequences for this? She should be adequately punished -- removing her phone, computer time, or whatever else you feel would work.


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Old 12-23-2019, 04:21 AM
  #11

So sorry you're dealing with this. We went through something similar 20 years ago, it's still a painful reminder of our child (a former addict). Do you suspect drug use??
You' re doing right by closing account and contacting police. My thoughts are with you.
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Old 12-23-2019, 05:50 AM
  #12

I am so sorry you're dealing with this. Hopefully you'll get her back on track.
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Old 12-23-2019, 06:02 AM
  #13

I am sorry this happened. I agree with Sassyteach. I would make sure there were consequences for this action. No going out, take computer except for schoolwork in your presence. Take phone-she will be grounded so you know where she is.
Years ago a cousin of mine would take money and things from his parents and they did not do anything about it. He was a teenager and did not turn out well. He became a drug addict, lost everything, and it took him years to get his life back.
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Book of Checks
Old 12-23-2019, 06:23 AM
  #14

Please check to be sure she has not also used checks that may be stored in a desk drawer.

When I send for checks, I always order about four hundred of them. If your daughter knows where yours are stored, she may have used some of those too. Look through each pad of checks to be sure she didn't take ones from the middle of a pad.

I agree with everyone else...call the police (there will be court costs, so be sure she has money to pay for those), close the account, and make life miserable for your daughter. At my house, Christmas gifts for her would be returned. Those gifts would pay for the money she used from your account.

Questions: Was this her idea or did she get this idea from one of her friends? Why did she need the money? For what was the money used?
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Old 12-23-2019, 06:23 AM
  #15

DD has lots of problems, we have had lots of police contact for violent behavior, she is in a special program at school, she has no friends, she is on meds, has been hospitalized for mental illness and suicidal thoughts. The list goes on...

She doesn't have a phone. She took our laptop, but luckily we found it (again). It is now hiding in our linen closet.

We dont give her technology times because she can't be trusted. Unfortunately, she gets on the computer at school or a family friend's house. She created some fb accounts and was messaging people that she was interested in buying their dogs. That's why I'm so worried she has other checks out.

She also was messaging a man saying she was 22, she is 15. I have told her this is such dangerous behavior, but it doesn't sink in. I'm so scared for her.
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Old 12-23-2019, 07:20 AM
  #16

Iím so sorry that your family is going through this!

It sounds like you are doing everything that you can to help her.
I would hope that the family friend cares enough about her to keep her off of the tech stuff in their home. If they need a clue ó then I would tell them that any shady dealings can be traced back to their computers.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family! <<<hugs>>>
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Old 12-23-2019, 07:41 AM
  #17

Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. It sounds like you are dealing with a lot.
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Old 12-23-2019, 08:01 AM
  #18

That is a very stressful situation. I hope you and your family have some happy moments in this holiday season. Dealing with mental illness in children takes strength and courage and it sounds like you have both. Take care of yourself and best of luck.
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Old 12-23-2019, 08:07 AM
  #19

I just want to suggest that it might be time to purchase a safe big enough to put your valuables in that you can bolt to the floor/wall. Don't want until after you "should have." I would put all my important things away regularly.

Sorry that you are going through this, but please protect yourself.

I thought she was in a program, but I guess she must have been released. It does sound like she needs continuous care for her own safety and for yours.
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Old 12-23-2019, 08:58 AM
  #20

I'm so sorry you're dealing with all those issues concerning your daughter. I know it isn't easy.
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Old 12-25-2019, 07:26 PM
  #21

I am so sorry my friend. I have been there and I understand your pain, worry and anxiety. Loving someone with a mental illness is something I wouldn't wish on anyone, including the person who has it. You said she is on meds. If she is still experiencing these symptoms (including stealing), she is most likely not on the right ones. With the right meds she is at least going to show some improvement. Is she on an anti-depressant or stimulant ADHD med? If so, that is probably your culprit. Our DD has bipolar and until they got her off the Prozac and on a mood stabilizer things were worse then they had been previously.

(((HUGS)))

Nancy
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