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Have y'all noticed?
Old 05-02-2018, 03:45 PM
  #1

It's rough to be a kid nowadays. My daughter (7th grader but only 12) has SO many friends and classmates with mental health struggles. These are GT students, active in extra curriculars, popular, etc. She has experienced anxiety this year and so many of her classmates are on meds for anxiety, depression, etc.

She told me about an incident today with a boy that sits next to her in math where she witnessed him going to the bathroom with scissors (apparently he has some issues) and she had to tell the teacher who in turn had to get counselors involved. She is upset about it. I know middle school is a rough time but what is happening to our kids?
It's not all parents to blame, because I rate myself as an excellent parent yet she still fights anxiety. It just makes me sad for these kiddos.


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Old 05-02-2018, 03:51 PM
  #2

My youngest probably should have been on meds much earlier than we got her on them, but who would have thought she had anxiety as a youngster? She didn't even have a reason to at the time we finally got it figured out.

Definitely something is going on. I don't know - maybe all the modifications and additives in foods. With all the increases in health care and medications, it doesn't seem like we should have so many early issues, but there sure are. I think it is something from the ground up. Even trying to go organic isn't going to fix things as there have been so many genetic modifications to foods/seeds.
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Old 05-02-2018, 03:59 PM
  #3

You mention this being GT kids and kailua mentioning not even having a reason to when her DD was diagnosed...as if these are things that would prevent the mental health issues. I do firmly believe the mind and body are complicated things and there are a lot of biochemical things going on that aren't fully understood. I know plenty of people who don't necessarily have a real reason to be depressed or anxious or whatever....but do anyway...and some people who have every reason in the world to have issues and don't.
Quite honestly too, I worry in part about the message we are sending kids with the expectations. I think there's a message sent that their achievements equal their worth at least in DD's school if that makes sense. Always this sense of having to prove oneself by achieving academically, socially, athletically, and artistically and beginning from an early age. I remember DD having her first soccer tryout when she was 7. 7!!!!! Claire, I know that you know what I'm talking about. And kids who are 10 or 11 thinking it's too late to start playing a sport.
It's just crazy. Poor kids.
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Old 05-02-2018, 04:11 PM
  #4

I definitely think kids are under a lot of pressure. I also think the internet and social media have tons to do with it. I don't know what the root cause is. I mean, we had mean kids, competitive snobs etc in school too, but it wasn't 24-7 like it is now with phones and social media. My son I think is about the last age that DIDN'T have smart phones in middle school and that was a good thing. I just don't know. My dd is really a nurturer and I feel like she takes on too much worrying about others, but that's also one of her best qualities and I won't try to get her to change it.

Uggggg....can we just go back to 1982??
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Old 05-02-2018, 04:50 PM
  #5

I'll list a few of the reasons: I think there are so many kids with isdues:

exposure to things that we not age appropriate
to soonn...movies,TV, music, video games
lack of family structure. No this doesn't mean every household need to parents, but they need someone to be in charge. Patents need to parent first and then be friends. Nobody will ever convince me that dvorve, although necessary, at times, doesn't affect kidskids
too many activities. Kids are so involved there is no time to just be still and relax
peer pressure..kids are doing things younger and younger and those that do expect others to join in to be cool. What kid doesn't want to be cool?
perfectionism/unorganized. Some kids are just wired that way and it causes unnecessary pressure
keeping up with the Joneses. Everyone needs the newest and greatest. Used to be you got something and used it until it wore out or didn't fit anymore. Now we get new phones every 2 years, spend a gazillion $$ to have the nicest clothes, hair, purse.

That's all I can think of right now!����


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rough being a kid
Old 05-02-2018, 07:08 PM
  #6

I agree. I knew that it wasn't good when I was teacher, but I wasn't really exposed to how bad it could be until I became a school psych. Doing a few 5150s will make you grateful for your own mental health.

As to why, I think teachnkids nailed it!
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Old 05-02-2018, 08:15 PM
  #7

I think one reason we are seeing an increase in it is the fact that many families are now more likely to seek help for their children. Sadly the system is so broken that it often takes years to get the correct diagnosis and even longer to figure out which medication or combo of meds will work.

Mental illness is not caused by poor parenting, character flaws and the like, but they are actual physical illnesses which are no different than diabetes and epilepsy.

Nancy
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Old 05-03-2018, 07:47 AM
  #8

All of the above are good observations. There is a lot of unrest in our country and the world. Kids pick up on that.
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Old 05-03-2018, 02:49 PM
  #9

Nancy I would never discount true mental illness. It exists and is very real. However I do think that society and the items I listed play a part in the "lower" level issues, for lack of a better word.

I do also agree that there is more awareness and less stigma so people are less afaid to come forward and seek help.

Life is not easy for kids these days!
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Amen...
Old 05-03-2018, 03:29 PM
  #10

To all that has been posted here.
I have a student in my class who is so hard on himself when he thinks he doesn’t do as well as he thinks he should....
Oh, my goodness!
As an adult in middle age, I have long been “too hard on myself”....
Did it also start for me when I was 10 or younger?
Or is it starting at younger ages now due to whatever may be attributing to this?


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Old 05-03-2018, 05:21 PM
  #11

Yes! I agree completely. In addition to the is the bullying that takes place- not a kid being a jerk to another kid- the act of repeatedly taunting, teasing or excluding another for an extended period.

We had an 8th grader commit suicide last week at one of our middle schools. I am an older mom, so my son is being raised very differently than some of his friends. He is 9 and loves cartoons, all things Lego and the best of all- a big box. His peers seem so much more sophisticated than he is and I’m fine with that. I told the parent of a student yesterday to remember that the word parent is a noun, and also a verb!
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Old 05-03-2018, 05:40 PM
  #12

Relearner...I bet if you look back you will see that you were hard on yourself at an early age. School may have come easier for you at that age so it might not have been as noticible!

My DD is sooooo hard on her self. It didn't really come out too badly until college, but there were done signs earlier. I remember when she got her first B on her report card. You would have thought someone was killed that was near and dear to her!🤣. She has had a counselor all through undergrad, graf, and now PhD

NCteacher bullying has been around and it's always been bad. I was a victim to some serious bullying. Not sure why I came through it without too many scars. I'm not sure why it now causes such severe reactions except if you add all the other stuff going on these days. Thinking that social media is one sdoevt that explodes things.
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