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PeaceLoveRun PeaceLoveRun is offline
 
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Not having teacher friends is hard
Old 11-12-2019, 07:39 PM
 
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I'm struggling this year. I'm a veteran teacher, almost 20 years experience. I'm new to a district this year and these are some of the things I'm dealing with that I'm pulling my hair out over:

I was told I could teach my own things as long as they followed the standards as a grade level. I chose to do a different writing activity and principal came in for a surprise visit and then sent me a long email asking me to valid my reasoning behind why I was doing a different activity for writing and to explain how it met all the same standards as the others. I emailed and explained and she never brought it up again. But then my LST comes in and asks me to do the same thing for her. Then she observes my writing so she can report back to principal, then she gives me tips. Now I have to leave my class tomorrow for an hour to observe a 3rd year teacher and how she uses academic discourse in the classroom (having students stand to answer questions in complete sentences during lessons).

I had my formal evaluation. Principal set up a meeting afterwards, that she failed to show up for. I have yet to hear anything about it.

I had to observe guided reading. Even though I've taught Guided Reading.

My lead teacher in my team saves everthing for the last minute, including report cards, which I neede d guidance on because I'm new to the district. I spent 10 hours over the 3 day weekend trying to get them done.

Another thing that we have put off is our Christmas song for the program. I suggested a song and the other team teacher liked it but our lead teacher did not. So instead of choosing a different song, she is requesting help from the LST in picking a song. I'm not sure why we can't choose our own song for Kindergarten Christmas program.

I have a student who is escalating in his behavior issues. His guardian doesn't care. He intentionally breaks the other students' things, spills their drinks, pours water bottles on other kids, throw crayons, doesn't do any work, yells over me when I'm trying to teach.

I took an emergency day off after Halloween because my dog almost didn't make it through a surgery. When I returned, no one asked how my dog was. I know that's pretty minor and a bit nitpicky, but it made me realize how lonely I've been feeling this year. I've definitely had worse years, but I've always had teacher friends to help me through it. Thanks for letting me vent.


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Old 11-12-2019, 07:48 PM
 
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I get it. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with being treated like you're inferior - because you're not! So often it seems that if you didn't do it with them, they think you don't know how to do it as well as they do. So frustrating and demeaning.

How is your dog doing? I hope he's better. A dog's unconditional love sometimes is the only way to get through the crap!

hugs!
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PeaceLoveRun PeaceLoveRun is offline
 
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Better!
Old 11-12-2019, 07:52 PM
 
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He is getting better. Not all the way back to normal, but I'd say about 90%. Thank you for asking!
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Old 11-12-2019, 08:59 PM
 
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Yikes, that's so frustrating! Sounds like they're assuming you need training and support without having evidence to back that up, and not paying attention to your experience because it wasn't with them. I'm sorry. I wish I had a great solution for you! I'm glad your dog is on the mend though. I hope that that continues, and that you make some "real life" teacher friends soon.
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Old 11-13-2019, 04:47 AM
 
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I'm glad your dog is getting better, and remember you can always find teacher friends here on PT while you are working on finding some in your new school. Keep in touch


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Education is not immune from the
Old 11-13-2019, 04:49 AM
 
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pecking order. I know that's an old term, but it sadly reflects how some teachers are treated. I'm sure it doesn't help, but it sounds like the lead teacher and some others are afraid. They've built their position, and they like it at the top.

I wish every principal knew that the primary factor in job satisfaction, especially for teachers, is feeling valued.

I've dealt with being the new outsider, and I basically yessed my way through it. I also found time to ask the entrenched teachers how they did things. For me, it helped to learn the school culture and to deal with the fact that my experience wasn't what was wanted. (I had over twenty years experience, and top test scores.) I was the new hen in the henhouse, and I focused on doing my job well while protecting myself. Eventually, things became better.

As you can tell, I try to reason through difficulties, but as I've aged, I find it doesn't help all that much.

SO- the MOST IMPORTANT thing- as forkids2 said so well:
Quote:
I'm glad your dog is getting better, and remember you can always find teacher friends here on PT while you are working on finding some in your new school.
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PeaceLoveRun
Old 11-13-2019, 05:17 AM
 
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I am happy to read that your fur baby is on the mend! As forkids2 said, remember that we are here for you.
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Old 11-13-2019, 06:39 AM
 
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Sounds to me that you were lied to when told "you could do your own thing." I know it's hard as an experienced teacher to be told to observe a three year newbie, but apparently your principal does want you all doing the same thing. I would find that sooooo frustrating but, is it worth fighting?? Do what they want, jump through the hoops, make life as easy as you can.... By being different, you're giving them something to criticize and question.

As for your co-workers, they sound like a bunch of jerks. We're much nicer here on PT...so hang out with us! Glad your pup is doing better. Hang in there...It's a stressful time of year for kids as well as teachers.

Last edited by rusty; 11-13-2019 at 06:28 PM..
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Play the Game
Old 11-13-2019, 08:38 AM
 
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Yes, you know what you are doing , and , yes, you've been doing this for a long time. However, being a loner isn't working for you. Swallow your pride and play the game. Once you've gained the respect of all, you can begin to slip in your tried and true methods again, and those techniques won't be so threatening to them.
Have I been there? Yes. It's not fun, but it comes down to basic manipulation...much like you do with the students.
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Old 11-13-2019, 06:58 PM
 
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So glad your puppy is doing well!


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Ikr
Old 11-15-2019, 03:39 PM
 
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Today we had PD for half a day. I had to finish up some work and didnít get time to even eat lunch. I went to the PD where teachers were already sitting and some were finishing their lunch. Some spots looked like they might have been empty. I went around and asked at 3 different tables if someone was sitting there. Not until the 4 th table did I find a spot. My team didnít save me a spot, so I thought itíd be good to sit by someone I donít get to talk with much.
I felt completely unwelcome!

Iím new at my school this year too.
Ya, Iím worried about upcoming observations. Schools seem so clicky. I canít wait to retire.
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