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3 yo. behavior

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yoohoo yoohoo is offline
 
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yoohoo
 
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3 yo. behavior
Old 06-12-2012, 06:17 PM
 
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I work in a preschool and have a student who--for whatever reason when he doesn't get what he wants he starts to cry and whine and kick his feet......

like today---he didn't like the snack that was handed out and sat at the table and sulked.... I saw this and asked him what was wrong? he just sat there and almost started to cry. I told him to use his words and tell me what's going on...nothing....

this has been going on for some time now...if he doesn't like the toy he cries; he doesn't get to be first in line he cries; etc.....

any ideas as to how to engage him and stop the crying and whining??!!


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kbaker2212 kbaker2212 is offline
 
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behavior issues
Old 06-12-2012, 06:55 PM
 
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I am the teacher in an Early Childhood Special Education classroom. MANY of my kiddos have behavior issues including tantrums, physically violent episodes, and I am called "not nice" words ALL the time! Many of my kiddos also have difficulty expressing themselves because of speech and language issues. The behavior kiddos are always my favorites! They have their moments, but are usually the sweetest kiddos ever! My biggest advice to you is to stick with your routines/schedule/whatever. THe biggest mistake I see parents and other teachers make is to give in to the child's wants and tantrums! Yes, it is easier at the time, but it creates long-term problems. Ignoring is key! I have had a child scream as loud as he can for over 20 minutes while I was doing circle time! It was totally distracting for me and the kids, but it happens at this age and his peers learned to get used to and ignore these tantrums! BEsides ignoring, my next suggestion is to use reinforcements. We go by the PBS system at our school (positive behavior support). If a child is tantruming or refusing to do something, we reward all the children who are cooperating with things such as: candy, bubbles, noise makers, high fives, candy spray, whoopi cushion, passing around something really neat, anything! The child who is not cooperating will very quickly change their behavior to get that reward! The key is to find what they like and would want as a reward and to NOT give in until they do what you are asking. Most of the time they will sit and do what I ask immediatly after I reward the others; however, they cannot get the reward even then. You say, "I am glad you decided to sit like everyone else, but you need to do this when I ask, try again next time!" Also be sure to give that child a chance to earn that reward immediately following the reward given to others. They almost always will try and then when they get that reward, they remember it for the next time!

Good Luck!
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HorrorHigh HorrorHigh is offline
 
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Old 07-03-2012, 09:41 PM
 
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Try Conscious Discipline by Becky Bailey. That is a wonderful resource.

Crying, whining, and tantruming is pretty typical of 3 year olds. I suggest keeping a week-long record of what triggers this child's reaction. Focus on getting the reaction you want. Teach him to use words instead of telling him to use his words. He obviously doesn't have the "words" to tell you what is wrong. He needs you to guide him in sorting out his feelings and model what is appropriate.

The Conscious Discipline method discourages against the use of tangible rewards. I call it "training monkeys" and it doesn't teach the children anything but how to win prizes.

I think this is the hardest part of our job-modeling guidance and social skills. Best wishes to you!
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