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Help me figure out this child
Old 11-07-2016, 04:16 PM
 
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I have a really special snowflake. She does next to no work. Very busy getting into everyone else's business. When she sees me helping others, suddenly she "doesn't understand." I am talking things as ridiculous as where to write your name. She never pays attention. Blurts out wrong directions. Lies and steals. Doesn't turn in homework.

I have talked with mom, who just talks her to death and prays with her. I believe in prayer...but this isn't working.

Love and Logic has no effect on her. Ignoring her works about 50% of the time.

I make her do the work at recess or when we're doing something fun. Nothing changes. She is exhausting me.

Do I give up? Try one more strategy? Parent teacher conference is next week and I want to give mom some ideas for home but I can't find her price. Daily report was useless.


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Old 11-09-2016, 12:54 PM
 
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I'm not sure what to recommend but noticed you hadn't gotten any responses yet and I hate it when that happens. Do you have any read on why she does it? Like is she look for attention or is there some underlying learning difficulty? I know it doesn't sound like that because it's for stuff she clearly should be able to do like writing her name but I thought I'd ask. Is there a way for her to get positive attention from somebody else? I was thinking back to when I had a student I'd sometimes send to the office on a made-up errand and they'd give her some positive attention when she was there. Got her out of my hair, gave her some positives. Or maybe try breaking the assignments up into chunks? But I'm sure you've done that.
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Thanks, Cruxian
Old 11-09-2016, 05:19 PM
 
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I thought there'd be more responses, too. But, life has been crazy for everyone recently.

I am pretty sure she is just looking for attention. She is an only child living with mom and grandparents. Mom works three jobs, often at night,mso is a little out of touch with school. Dad wants nothing to do with her, which is probably her issue. Mom does discuss this with her, but not always appropriately. /mom told child, in front of me, that dad wants nothing to do with her. This makes me sad, but doesn't help situation.

If you give her positive attention she then follows me around the room basically saying "Look at me! Look what I'm doing now. Isn't it great?" She will do this for an hour.

I think she may also have ADD.
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Old 11-11-2016, 03:55 PM
 
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Could you give her a checklist to fulfill before she is allowed to come and see you? When you have done x amount, or filled in this much... you can come show me, but I'm not going to talk to you at all until it is all done. Praise her for the work only, not the behaviour, and then slowly increase the amount she needs to do before she can show you - sort of slowly weaning her off. Each time she achieves the task you will need to set the next task. But also set up rules around coming to see you, for example under no circumstances may you interrupt a group just to show me your work. And you must always wait your turn in line, or stay at your desk with your hand up until I come (or whatever system you have for gaining attention).
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Old 11-11-2016, 05:25 PM
 
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Hmmm....why didn't I think of that! It just might work. It's worth a try.


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Wow hard to tell
Old 11-15-2016, 07:36 AM
 
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I didn't have time to read all responses, so forgive me if repeated.

* Has she been tested for disability or autism
* is she being abused
* have you pointed out to her privately that she is not working like a "4th grader" and ask her why she is not...she might know
*what was last year like for her
*does she have a behavior plan, rewards and consequences
* is there an older student who could mentor or be a buddy when she does perform

Do you like wine? lol Good Luck!
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Old 11-15-2016, 06:16 PM
 
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One friend told me about how every day she would pick on kid and just talk to that kid for 2 minutes a day for several days in a row. I 've had a really long day so I don't remember the catchy name or even the logistics but the gist was that if you spend time with one kid, you develop a relationship with that kid and they tend to be less needy.

I need to do that with a couple of my most needy kids.
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Peer Buddy
Old 11-15-2016, 06:37 PM
 
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Is there an older student who could use a mentee? Your kiddo could be mentored by this older person-maybe check in and read a story in the morning. Give her that positive attention and then buddy leaves and goes to her class. If your friend has good day, buddy comes tomorrow. Basic but I have seen it work. Plus some older kids could really use that confidence boost.

Just an idea.
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