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Somebody help please. Long
Old 07-05-2020, 09:06 AM
  #1

A little background. Someone I subbed for (long term and odd days) has a grandson who needs help with English, Algebra and study skills. CAN'T. DO. ALGEBRA. I was never a classroom teacher for anything but English until I retired and started subbing. She knows I taught reading in a pull out program, but I had someone who knew what they were doing give me directions and materials.
Her grandson was supposedly being home schooled by his mother before she passed away from cancer. He's now back with his father (ex husband). There apparently wasn't a lot of schooling and there were no records or anything. When they (there are two of them) got put in public school, the district tested them and placed them as best they could.

She said he's having trouble because he can't always read and understand directions for things he's supposed to do. They tell him to look up the words he doesn't understand in the dictionary, but then he can't use them in the context of the directions (her words).
I don't even know where to get materials or anything. She thinks I'm great (good for the esteem, but misplaced). Can anyone help? I really don't want to do this because I don't feel I'm qualified, but she's really insistent.


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It's ok to say no
Old 07-05-2020, 09:42 AM
  #2

Please remember that if you don't want to do this, it is ok to say "No."
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Old 07-05-2020, 09:53 AM
  #3

I agree it is okay to say no. Don't let her talk you into something that makes you uncomfortable. If you want to say something like you appreciate her confidence in you but you absolutely do not feel qualified to do this and then just say no and wish them the best.

Possibly they could get in touch with the principal or guidance counselor of the school and see if they have any recommendations. It is not your problem to solve.
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Look up a few places
Old 07-05-2020, 09:55 AM
  #4

I don’t think you should be ‘guilted’ into doing it. Maybe, if you’d like, you can help by doing some research for her to find a suitable tutor with experience in the areas he needs. Schools might be closed now, but maybe you can call the main office to see if they have a summer school tutoring program. Give her a list of potential resources so she can choose whatever fits the needs of her grandchild.
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I wouldn’t
Old 07-05-2020, 10:13 AM
  #5

It sounds like it would be stressful for you. I would say, “I can’t say yes, but thank you for thinking of me.” There are many teachers who welcome new students to tutor- she will be able to find someone who wants this job.

Please don’t feel obligated.


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Old 07-05-2020, 10:14 AM
  #6

Yes, help her find a qualified tutor to help. If you subbed for her, then she's a teacher, right? Why isn't she helping him?
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Old 07-05-2020, 10:31 AM
  #7

I would suggest to her that she reach out to community Facebook pages for teachers in her grandsons' district. Or even look to see if there is a nearby college that could steer her friend towards some education majors who can tutor. If she attends a church/place of worship, she might be able to advertise announce things through that outlet.

And tell her, "Thanks for thinking of me!"
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I agree
Old 07-05-2020, 10:38 AM
  #8

that you should refuse to tutor this boy.
I just googled Sylvan Learning Centers and Kuman and to my surprise their websites state they are tutoring while taking precautions. Kuman says they offer in person as well as virtual classes. While pricey, this may be a good alternative for him. Both businesses employ certified educators.
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Old 07-05-2020, 10:43 AM
  #9

She could also call the school district the child will attend and ask if they have staff that are willing to tutor. My old school district kept a list of staff willing to do this for just this reason.
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Old 07-05-2020, 10:44 AM
  #10

When I get requests like this and it's not in my wheelhouse or ability to take on, I give a few recommendations of places for them. When I have taken on things like this against my better judgment, I've never been happy about it.


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Old 07-05-2020, 12:30 PM
  #11

Quote:
I really don't want to do this
If you don't want to do it, the answer is a simple. "Sorry, I am unavailable to tutor your grandson."

Quote:
Someone I subbed for (long term and odd days) has a grandson who needs help
Looks like Grandma is also a teacher. She has connections/knows people in order to find a tutor. There is no need to pressure a retired substitute teacher into tutoring her grandchild.

Trust your instincts. This is not a gig you want.
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I decided y'all are
Old 07-05-2020, 06:18 PM
  #12

right. I'm going to tell her to have their dad contact the school district where they go now. I don't think it would be fair to him or me and since I take care of someone with heart, lung, blood pressure and diabetes problems, I don't need to be around someone who may have been around people who are not practicing good safety measures.
Thanks for your help. It's hard for me to tell someone no.
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Old 07-06-2020, 10:06 AM
  #13

You made the right decision! During this crazy time in our lives you do not need more stress in your life.
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I talked to her today.
Old 07-06-2020, 03:24 PM
  #14

The situation for the kid is worse than I thought so I hope they can find someone to help him, but it's just not me. She took it well.


Thanks again for all the help.
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Old 07-06-2020, 03:49 PM
  #15

I would advise her to post on nextdoor and ask if there any tutors available. I bet she gets several responses.
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Old 07-06-2020, 04:22 PM
  #16

It’s a heartbreaking situation. You’re a good person, wanting to help even though it’s not your area. You have definitely made the right decision to not tutor.

Since the mother was sick, she couldn’t teach the kids. So very sad. Could you remind the adult (grandma or dad) to request testing for an IEP as soon as possible? It’s probably already in the works or done but just wanted to point it out. Things are slipping through the cracks during this strange time. I’d also suggest counseling for the kids. They’re going through so much.
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