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Gender Reveals
Old 07-27-2019, 04:31 PM
  #1

That wasn't a thing when I had my 18 and 14 year old. I'm kind of glad. I'm not a big production kind of gal. With both of mine I just wanted healthy. I guess I was "lucky" to get one of each.

BUT...I've seen at least two videos recently of people I know doing their gender reveals where their other child pouts when it is not the gender they wanted. I'm talking kids 9+ and old enough to know better. That just irks me. I'm not sure why.

ETA: I'm not against the party itself. I dont want to insult anyone. I hate the older kids pouting and throwing a tantrum when the gender is not what they want.


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Gender reveals gone wrong
Old 07-27-2019, 04:37 PM
  #2

I saw this and thought it was the stupidest thing possible :
https://edition.cnn.com/2019/07/09/a...ntl/index.html



until I saw this:
https://edition.cnn.com/2018/11/27/u...rnd/index.html
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Gender Reveals
Old 07-27-2019, 04:44 PM
  #3

Count me in as one who does not care for gender reveals.
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Old 07-27-2019, 04:53 PM
  #4

Quote:
I know doing their gender reveals where their other child pouts when it is not the gender they wanted. I'm talking kids 9+ and old enough to know better. That just irks me. I'm not sure why.
Yes, and what irks me is it is posted because people think it is funny/cute. It's one thing if it happens, but then to encourage it and think it's funny is quite irritating.

I'm going to my friend's sprinkle. I'm not against those either, but when I went to the registry, it is all a bunch of frivolous things. I don't mind giving her clothes, diapers, necessities (which I will end up doing), but it makes it more into a gift grab to only register for all this fluffy stuff.
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Old 07-27-2019, 04:53 PM
  #5

Oh wow, anonymous! The second video- really??? Having something ignite amongst that kind of dry, dry landscaping was someone's idea??

Claire, that would get to me! I don't know anyone who has done a gender reveal party (and I haven't watched any online), but that is not ok. I've seen adults whine about the gender child they are getting, and that really ticks me off, too. It's one thing to have some disappointment (I won't comment on that) but totally a different thing to make that public. I think sometimes parents think it's funny when kids behave badly and love to show the world, too. Don't know if that is happening in this case.


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Old 07-27-2019, 04:59 PM
  #6

Grace exactly! It is not cute for your child to act bratty. These are not toddlers.
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Old 07-27-2019, 05:34 PM
  #7

I feel like so many things these days are so much more over-the-top and " look at me!" attention getting than when we went through it . I blame a lot of the trend on social media and " reality" tv shows that push the ideas.
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Old 07-27-2019, 06:24 PM
  #8

I am so glad it wasn't a thing when my kids were little, too. In fact, I'm really thankful that pinterest and social media wasn't so prevalent when my kids were young!



Does anyone else see the irony, though? These huge gender reveals in the midst of trying to do away with gender norms and identity. I find it fascinating.
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Old 07-27-2019, 06:33 PM
  #9

Honestly, I find it silly. I'm glad they weren't around when my boys were born.

DIL didn't do a gender reveal. She just told all of us!
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Old 07-27-2019, 07:03 PM
  #10

Iíve only been to one gender reveal party. When it was a boy, the Mom sat down and sobbed. She already had one boy, and she wanted a girl. It was awkward. Pregnancy hormones and surprises donít seem to mix well.


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I am 99.9% sure you could not find out
Old 07-27-2019, 07:08 PM
  #11

ahead of time, when mine were babies. I think parents need to explain to their kids to be thankful for a sibling. Period!
Sometimes parents think it is funny when their kid wants a brother and gets a sister.
IDK why, but I think a PP was right that certain people think it is funny when their kids act bad.
Instead of the kid, focus on the parent to be irked at! Those types of parents usually pay dearly for it too.
So instead of being irked, you can feel sorry what the parents are going to be supporting the rest of their lives.
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Old 07-27-2019, 07:20 PM
  #12

Ima, it was news to the pregnant woman? Maybe I don't understand how these work.
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Old 07-27-2019, 07:25 PM
  #13

Zia- sometimes the u/s tech puts the gender in a sealed envelope (on request) and the couple then bring that to a baker who makes a gender reveal "cake" where the inside is either pink or blue. So the couple cutting the cake finds out for the first time the gender at the party as well. I'm guessing other people may do that in another way (hire someone or use a friend who gives them the reveal in some way- apparently, having explosions is now common...).
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Old 07-27-2019, 07:31 PM
  #14

Just another reason to have a party on top of the baby shower too. I don't like having attention on myself either, so I could care less about parties.

I know the OP's specifically talking about the siblings having tantrums, but I'll chime in about the whole thing in general.
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Old 07-27-2019, 07:50 PM
  #15

I have never been to a gender reveal and I honestly have to say I am glad. I just think its an excuse for another party.

Nancy
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Old 07-27-2019, 08:00 PM
  #16

I don't have a problem with having parties! The party aspect doesn't bug me at all about this. I've never heard of a gender reveal party expecting gifts, which is usually the common complaint for parties around births or weddings.
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Old 07-27-2019, 08:06 PM
  #17

I'm late to the thread, but I have to tell this story! My friend is having a gender reveal party, but she keeps slipping and saying things like she and her. Well by the time you have that party everyone will know you are having a girl!

I thought that a gender reveal was for everyone, even the mom. I thought the doctor puts the gender in an envelope and you then take that envelope to a baker or a balloon person to do the gender thing. That way it is a surprise.
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Old 07-28-2019, 04:22 AM
  #18

^ Either that OR as a way for the couple to announce to their "public" what gender it will be.
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Old 07-28-2019, 04:38 AM
  #19

Thanks for explaining, GK. My gender reveals happened at the time of birth.
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Bring it on!
Old 07-28-2019, 04:56 AM
  #20

We are over the moon excited because we are expecting our first Grandchild on January 10th! We never had gender reveal parties when I had children but they do now. Today we are invited to a “BQ” at my sons house. I am betting that its a gender reveal because 2 weeks ago DS invited us to the BQ and DIL is 20 weeks along. They had blood tests which also reveal the gender. My antennas are up!

I have a question for those who might be thumbs down on gender reveal parties. Have you experienced the joy of having a first grandchild? I only ask this because we can hardly contain ourselves with excitement and a gender reveal party is part of our celebration of this life. Boy or girl? I can hardly wait to find out!
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Old 07-28-2019, 05:00 AM
  #21

Not so much a fan, but if a couple wants to announce the gender in the presence of their family and friends-go for it!
I think the posting of the event is a little too much of "look at me." If all your friends/family are present, why make a video for strangers to see?
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Old 07-28-2019, 05:38 AM
  #22

Quote:
Have you experienced the joy of having a first grandchild? I only ask this because we can hardly contain ourselves with excitement and a gender reveal party is part of our celebration of this life. Boy or girl? I can hardly wait to find out!
No grandkids, but I gave birth to two without knowing ahead of time if they were a boy or girl. I guess I really don't care much?

I'm super excited for you, though.
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Old 07-28-2019, 06:21 AM
  #23

I haven't been to one myself but did just read that the woman who kinda started them regrets it because gender incorporates so much more than male/female. Once again, something simple gets blown out of proportion.

I have no opinion either way to those that throw one or not. Celebrate a baby
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Gender reveal
Old 07-28-2019, 06:42 AM
  #24

I used to not like these, but I am coming around as there are classy ways to do it. Also, like pp sometimes I am so excited for the couple I want to party!

A very outgoing girl I know kept it low key for her second child. She meets monthly with a group of long-time friends and brought gender reveal cupcakes to their dinner.

A daughter of a friend of mine had been trying for years to get pregnant. When they got pregnant they did a gender reveal with colored water from a fire hose. The father is a firefighter. It was really cute.
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Old 07-28-2019, 06:48 AM
  #25

Quote:
I have a question for those who might be thumbs down on gender reveal parties. Have you experienced the joy of having a first grandchild? I only ask this because we can hardly contain ourselves with excitement and a gender reveal party is part of our celebration of this life. Boy or girl? I can hardly wait to find out!
My first grandchild is 14 months old. My son and DIL did have a gender reveal party. And it was fun! Why not an excuse for a party? And he's a boy and the light of my life, apple of my eye, and my sunshine. 😍

I do agree that siblings acting bratty is not cute! And congratulations, MathWA, you will have so much fun!
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Old 07-28-2019, 07:00 AM
  #26

I love what readandweep wrote. I, too, think celebrating a coming baby is a wonderful reason to party. I like the low-key events she describes. I think when thereís a way to do it where itís about the baby, not the parents or siblings, then a gender reveal can be lovely. As long as the purpose of the party is a surprise to guests and not a ďgift grab,Ē Iím totally on board.
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Old 07-28-2019, 07:09 AM
  #27

Quote:
Why not an excuse for a party?
I agree!!!
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Gender reveals.
Old 07-28-2019, 07:13 AM
  #28

I don't begrudge a person the opportunity to celebrate the discovery of their child's gender. I did not have one, as I'm pretty lukewarm about shower parties, but I've been to a few. They were fun, not dramatic or upsetting for anyone. I can see how it could go sideways.

I was way too excited to wait when I was pregnant. One of the most special, lovely memories I have was seeing my husband's face when we found out our first was a boy. I "felt" he was a girl and we were so surprised. I preferred the intimacy of just the four of us, including the tech and baby , for my reveal.
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It is fun to be pregnant and I wish everyone
Old 07-28-2019, 07:48 AM
  #29

a safe and happy pregnancy. That said, there is an increasing dramatization of people's ridiculousness over whether they are having a boy or girl. It's going to be one or the other. The fact that no one can wait to find out is absurd and tiresome.

When did having a kid become such a medal of honor? It's not like it is something unusual that took extra talent (though some need extra medical input). But still. You're having a kid. People do it every day.

The videos and guessing games and the overdone reactions are boring. Have a kid. Have ten kids. Keep it to yourself or tell those close to you. The rest of us don't care. Basically, a baby is a baby.
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Nothing...
Old 07-28-2019, 09:25 AM
  #30

Nothing will date you old old old and out of touch like a gender reveal party around my area. The Gen-Zers are thumbs down on all of it.

My DD has non binary friends. Two families had babies recently, and neither did a gender reveal party. The gear you are born with shouldn't define you as a person, they say. These teens/young adults believe most gender reveals are skewed to daddy finally getting his baby boy and with all the baggage that comes with it, or mom gets her future ballerina girly girly. The gender becomes the celebration more than the baby.

The one friend asked their mom if the baby was a boy, and turned out to be non binary like them, would she be disappointed? When you see some gender reveal parties, it makes you wonder how you reconcile your preconceived notions around gender.

It's just another view point. People do whatever they want. Do I care about pink/blue cup cakes? Shrug. I hope the mom and baby are happy, healthy and have a safe, uneventful labor and delivery. I know very few people under 30 having gender reveal where I live. My bakery owner friend says he's doing less cakes/cupcakes for specifically reveal parties. It's more
welcome to the family. The gender is revealed, but it isn't be big deal pink/blue dust ballon pop stuff I've seen on YouTube.
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Last little thing
Old 07-28-2019, 09:34 AM
  #31

I don't go to reveal parties any more. The last three went from party to wake, when the preferred gender was not obtained. At one party, the dad was so upset he left with his brothers. Another the mom went full bore crying melt down mode. The other was the big flick across the face of "ugh" and then fake happy happy.

All these parents love their now born kids, but all these shenanigans are caught on video by everyone and their dog at party. All of them had said, "As long as the baby is healthy..". Well emotions turn you into a poor actor.

These weren't all, "I didn't get the golden son." Two of them actually wanted a girl.
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Old 07-28-2019, 10:39 AM
  #32

See, stuff like your second post is what I'm talking about. Imagine with these videos all over social media and youtube etc. How would this child feel coming across his/her mom having a meltdown or dad leaving because they weren't the "correct" gender??? That is HIDEOUS.
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gender reveals
Old 07-28-2019, 10:50 AM
  #33

We couldn't have done a gender reveal when I was pregnant with my 3 kids because we didn't want to know ahead of time. We loved the surprise of it all.

I do enjoy the gender reveals, but I've only been to a few and I didn't see any pouting. That would be bothersome but they are still kids after all. That being said, it would be more understanding if they have an initial reaction and then get over it and smile.

The "healthy" baby is always funny to me. I always thought that went without saying. I've never heard someone say they wanted an unhealthy one.
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I just donít get
Old 07-28-2019, 11:05 AM
  #34

Everything having to be so public and over the top these days. From kids making a HUGE deal asking someone to a dance to these over the top gender reveals!

Iím glad Iím not in high school or having anymore kids!
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Exactly, Katluv!
Old 07-28-2019, 12:09 PM
  #35

I don't understand why everything is such a production these days - prom, engagement, having a child is all about choreographed theatrics! Ugh!
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Kids
Old 07-28-2019, 03:34 PM
  #36

Never knew which gender. I was fine with that!
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