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70Primrose 70Primrose is offline
 
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Frenzied co-workers
Old 08-23-2019, 09:35 AM
 
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I have two team members that stress me out so much when we have to plan together. I can only compare them to chickens with their heads cut off! I really enjoy them when we are not having to plan. How can I protect my nerves and not be drawn into their frenzied state of mind. I consider myself a highly sensitive person and I am working on protecting myself. Anyone else in this situation? What do you do?


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Old 08-23-2019, 09:56 AM
 
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I had a coworker like that once. He was new to my grade level and while he was as nice as could be, he was a nervous mess and so indecisive. He taught the same classes as me and as his team leader I had a double whammy having to plan with him, help him on a new grade level, and work with him and his anxiety.

I’d say...

Realize you can’t change people or “fix” their anxiety and you don't own it. You can only change how you deal with it.

Take deep breaths and practice mindful relaxation.

Have some key phrases ready to refocus them and to get y’all back on task.

Decide who does what and then go your separate ways to complete tasks.

Go to the gym to work out your own anxiety working with them.

Drink wine.

Good luck!
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I understand...
Old 08-23-2019, 01:32 PM
 
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I had great colleagues, but they were so frenzied, they didn't even stop to eat lunch, and spent all their time in their rooms. I needed a brief break, but they made me nervous thinking there was something I should be doing every minute with no down time. I am not sure there is much you can do, unless you can do some of your planning by yourself or divide the jobs somehow. I miss the good old days when I first started teaching before all this stress and pressure took hold.
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Frenzied coworkers
Old 08-23-2019, 05:02 PM
 
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Oh my yes. I have worked with a few. So, first, recognize the frenzied, possibly psychotic feeling behaviors aren’t going to change. BUT, you can say something to the effect “your stress is stressing me out. I can’t work the way you do. So, when we meet, can we agree to come prepared, and try to stay focused? Would it help if I guide the meetings?”

I found one of the teachers I worked with truly appreciated someone else structuring our meetings.

That, and a lot of wine.
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Old 08-23-2019, 05:17 PM
 
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Years ago we had two members of our team that were frenzied. Eventually, we learned to have an agenda emailed to the team before we met. Then if team members would get off-topic we'd refer to the agenda during the meeting to refocus the scattered thinkers. We limited the meeting time so everyone knew we couldn't obsess over a specific topic. I guess the trick was we refused to take the problems of the panicked team members and moved the meeting right along.


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This kind of
Old 08-24-2019, 02:23 AM
 
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behavior from colleagues is not beneficial to anyone. I agree with Renea and have an agenda for your meetings where someone other than the frenzied coworkers is in charge of keeping everyone on task.

I would not allow them to suck you into their “vortex of frenzy.”
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70Primrose 70Primrose is offline
 
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Big thanks!
Old 08-25-2019, 08:44 AM
 
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I am making an agenda for our PLC next week. Thank you all for replying. It is so nice to know I am not alone.
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Summerwillcom Summerwillcom is offline
 
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Same boat....
Old 08-25-2019, 10:25 AM
 
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It is like the stress just rubs off on you....Sometimes I try to remember things I am thankful for... I hope it subsides!
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Frenzied
Old 08-25-2019, 01:12 PM
 
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My best advice is to go to the planning sessions with some hot herbal tea for all of you. Something calming

If you start to stress with your colleagues, tell them you need a minute, and take a quick trip to the restroom and get your breathing back to normal. Do what you know is best to help you stay calm and focused. If you guys can build an agenda and add to it during the week (or take away), then go into our planning time with that. It has helped my group stay on task.
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Old 08-25-2019, 01:47 PM
 
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I used to have a teammate like this. She was in a constant state of panic and it drove me crazy. I had to work really hard to not feed into it. Honestly I'd just ignore and respond very calmly if she addressed me personally. The thing that was hardest for me was to not get sucked into doing extra things just to shut her up- I often had to stop myself from offering to just do whatever mundane thing she was incessantly complaining about.


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