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busybeing busybeing is offline
 
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busybeing
 
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Beside myself...
Old 01-07-2019, 12:05 PM
 
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More of a vent than anything, but I basically haven't stopped crying all afternoon.

I overheard some nasty gossip about me today at lunch. How do I know it was about me? Well, I NEVER eat my lunch in the teacher's lounge, mainly to avoid the gossip and negativity. I am lucky enough to teach one grade level and it was my grade level colleagues who were talking about me, not realizing this was one of 3 days total I've gone down and eaten in there. I know they didn't see me because I was at the end of the same side of our very long table and sitting back a bit.

They were talking in low voices, saying how this was my third year and "oh, great, just in time to be non-renewed!" Saying how I was sweet, but "completely clueless" and that my kids weren't getting what they needed, that I wasn't challenging them enough, and modifying their work to be way too easy in things like science and social studies. Then one of them said something about the size of my groups, and how I have 5 students who push into her class... that if I just had smaller sizes, etc. After our lunch, we had lunch duty together. I'm sure she could tell by my face.... she asked if I was okay, that I seemed "quiet." I told her I was fine, then she said I could send some kids to do a group activity with her everyday so that I could have "smaller groups."

I am devastated. I've never gotten a bad evaluation. My P at this school has never even evaluated me and its' my second year here (was still within the district my first year, but at a different school since I am a program based teacher), but, the teachers I worked with last year all had positive things to say about me.

Do I approach my principal and let her know I overheard this? Do I ask for suggestions?


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Old 01-07-2019, 06:32 PM
 
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Iím so sorry this happened to you, thatís a really crappy way to treat a colleague.

Iíve been around long enough that overhearing a conversation like that would make me so mad I would have said something right there and then.

But, if I were in your shoes, at this point I would approach whatever teammate you feel the most comfortable with and just lay it out. Tell her that you overheard the conversation and it was hurtful. Let her know that youíre open to suggestions, but donít appreciate being talked about behind your back. If they have enough grace to apologize, then accept and move on. I wouldnít go to your principal unless things get worse.

Again, I'm sorry for the way they treated you. Itís both unkind and unprofessional.
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Old 01-07-2019, 09:41 PM
 
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I'm so sorry this happened to you. I would be really hurt as well. I'm such a non-confrontational person that I'd probably never say anything and stew about it, which isn't really healthy. Is someone other than your P evaluating you?

Are these teachers "in" with the P and you're worried that they could have an impact on your eval? If that's the case, I might have a conversation with the P, but I would phrase it as feeling like the classroom teachers you work with aren't appreciating/understanding your work and that you need more suggestions for working with them. If you have any sort of check in or eval meeting this might be a good place to bring it up. You might also ask for feedback on your modifications.

If you want to go to the other teachers, I think pdx has a good suggestion with seeking out the one you feel most comfortable with. I would also take their "feedback" with a grain of salt. Many, many gen ed teachers, even great ones, don't really understand sped. I know for a fact that several gen ed teachers who I work with would probably say negative things about me if asked. They have unrealistic expectations and expect me to be a miracle worker because I have "special sped training."

In the schools I've worked in, a teacher wouldn't simply be blindsided with a non-renewal. There would be an instructional coach or admin in your room constantly giving "help," more feedback and meetings, and hoops for you to jump through to try to show you're improving. If no one is ever observing you, you're not on their radar. If you belong to a union, you might try asking them for support as well.
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Talk to your colleagues
Old 01-08-2019, 02:46 AM
 
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It would be difficult, but I would ask to meet with them and tell them youíd like their advice. You can let them know you heard them, and you want to do the best you can. See what suggestions they have. And ask them not to talk about you. It sounds like they like you, but were very wrong to talk about you in the teachersí room. And I wouldnít talk to the P, it might may him or her think there are issues there that arenít.

Iím so sorry that happened to you. We all need to support each other. Sending hugs and good thoughts!
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Old 01-08-2019, 02:48 PM
 
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I agree, if you can do, I'd call a private meeting with them and just clear the air. I hate conflict so it would be really hard but I think it would have the biggest effect on your work with them.

If you can frame it to yourself as a learning experience, go in with an open mind and reflect on their issues. Either you can back up your choices with solid reasons or maybe work with them to structure things to adjust the difficulty level.

They should not have done that but I think a lot of venting happens in co teaching just due to different expectations and perspectives. I try really hard not to vent at school and I would guess they feel at least embarrassed about it.


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Unfortunate
Old 02-02-2019, 07:23 PM
 
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Interesting that my district also offers three years contracts after your first probationary year.
I have heard similar conversations and walked in to a suddenly quiet lunchroom. I seldom eat in there, more often due to my schedule.
I am sorry that you had the experience, my personal advice is to make a note to yourself and keep track of similar happening events, if you belong to a strong organization, go to them for advice. Going to anyone on the team might just make matters worse, I thought teachers were all professional but that is not always the case. In my nineteen plus years I have worked with more terrific teachers than petty but the petty seem to be untouchable with administration.
May you be treated as the professional you are, rise above and do your best to not allow the mean girls to ruin your day.
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Haley23 Haley23 is offline
 
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Old 02-02-2019, 08:45 PM
 
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Busybeing, what did you decide to do? Whatever it is, I hope things are going better for you.
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