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Tattling!!
Old 08-01-2006, 05:37 PM
 
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This will be my first year teaching. Do 4th graders still tattle as much? I know some teachers have a tattle jar where the kids have to write down their tattle and the teacher reads it later. Is this too primary for 4th graders? How do you handle tattling?


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Yes!!!
Old 08-01-2006, 05:45 PM
 
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OMG! My 4th graders last year took the cake when it came to tattling. I also had a couple drama queens (3 to be exact). The tattling wore me out. I have tried a tattle box in the past. Personally, I dodn't like it. I also tried a tattle report. When a student wanted to tattle on someone, they had to fill out a form and do A LOT of writing. This tedious task usually discouraged tattling, but not always. I try to make it clear to my students that there is a difference between tattling and telling. They should tell me something that involved someone getting hurt, etc... but not tattle on someone to get them in trouble.
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Yes, yes,yes
Old 08-01-2006, 05:49 PM
 
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I used the tattle report with fourth graders. They hated filing it out. There were so much information they needed to provide me with that ususally only serious things ended up being reported.

Marie from PA
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Old 08-01-2006, 06:01 PM
 
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Do you have a copy of the tattle report that you could attach? I would love to see one If not, can you share the info. that the students have to fill out?
Thanks!
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Old 08-01-2006, 06:09 PM
 
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I actually didn't have a lot of tattling. I told them if it was about bullying or stealing items, then they needed to tell me.

The only part of tattling I had a problem with in the 4th grade last year, was an actualy 4th grade teacher, my coworker, and my supposed friend...who tattled on me about something I said in confidence that she made sound worse to the principal. I did not get in trouble b/c the principal knew how I really was.


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Old 08-02-2006, 02:11 AM
 
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I had a tattle-a-day policy. Students were only allowed to come to me once a day to tattle.
At the beginning of the year I explained that it was not tattling if you or someone else was hurt by words or actions and we role played examples.
If a child came to me to tattle I would ask them if this issue was important enough to use their tattle for the day or did they want to wait until later incase something more serious happened. Usually they would save it and forget about it.
If they did tattle, they had to start the sentence with "I..."

Our school also has a 3 step problem solving policy that is taught and practised K-6. It enables students to deal with other students who are being nasty or annoying them. Each class has a poster with these 3 steps written and illustrated. Students are praised for using the strategy.

If someone is upsetting you...
1. Look at the person using a mean face.
2. Say " Don't do that. I don't like it!"
3. Turn around and walk away.
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Confidentiality box
Old 08-02-2006, 04:41 AM
 
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I was thinking of having a Confidentiality box, similar to a tattle jar, but the students could put a variety of messages in the box. Sue is mean to me, Kenny keeps kicking my desk, I canít see the board, I lost my math journal and looked all over, what should I do? etc. Some are tattles and some are issues. I did not have an issue with tattling last year and Iím not sure if this would just encourage it. Advice?

Also I think this sounds more mature.
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tattle tales
Old 08-02-2006, 06:38 AM
 
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Yes, some fourth graders make it their objective to tattle daily on students. I've handled it a few different ways, private discussion, group discussion, book ~ follow-up discussion. Sometimes I just say "to just take care of themselves" or are they hurt? someone push them?, etc., then PLEASE tell me.

Jaime, I have a pug too! His name is Yoda. ;o)
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Old 08-02-2006, 01:51 PM
 
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I don't know where I came across this idea, but instead of using a tattle jar, you can use a sand pail and decorate it to look like a person (googly eyes, a bowtie, etc.) and call it Mr. Bucket. If a child is tattling, they need to follow the same procedure as they would with a tattle jar, but they need to tell Mr. Bucket.

I will be teaching 3/4/5 this year and am planning on using it. I don't think it is too "primary" for the older elementary students because tattling is not overly grown-up. That sounds kind of harsh, but I hope you see what I mean.
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Just the opposite
Old 08-02-2006, 03:56 PM
 
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I found that some years my fourth graders won't tattle enough! Occassionally I'll have a parent call to tell me about something that happened and I find that I'm the last to know. I swear they have an unwritten code. I think that's why I prefer 4th graders to the younger ones.

On occassion I've had a tattler and I tell them my policy is for them to tell me at the end of the day. They always forget.
Suzanne


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to: windalynn
Old 08-02-2006, 04:09 PM
 
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I don't have a copy, but can tell you what it included:
Name, Date, Time and Time of occurance
Who are you tattling on?
How long have you known this person?
What happened? (must be complete sentences and correct spelling)
List 4 positive things about the person you are tattling on.
Where were you born?
Tell me about your family (must be at least 3 paragraphs).
etc...

As you can see, some of the stuff on the form is comepletely irrelevant, but it makes the kids write and think. They have to fill out the form completely every time for me to even read it. All the writing usually took them at least 20 minutes. Most students realized that it wasn't worth all the trouble.
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My simple rule...
Old 08-02-2006, 06:48 PM
 
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didn't eliminate the problem but helped. I told the kids that if they wanted to tell me something to get someone IN trouble, that was tattling and I didn't want to hear it. If they wanted to tell me something to help someone (including themselves) get out of trouble, I wanted to hear about it.
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Old 08-02-2006, 07:11 PM
 
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Thanks Kristin....that gives me a great place to start
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I-Statements
Old 08-13-2006, 01:48 PM
 
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Our school uses a problem solving strategy similar to aliryan's: the "I-Statement." It goes, "I feel_______ when you _______. I need you to _______." (ex: I feel frustrated when you keep talking to me when we are supposed to be working. I need you to stop so I can concentrate on my work.")

I posted the I-Statement format all over my room, and it encourages kids to solve most of their problems on their own. I model and role-play during the 1st week of school to show the kids how and when to use it. Of course, I tell them that if it involves bullying, or if anyone is being hurt physically or emotionally, they need to tell an adult.

When they try to tattle, I ask them, "have you tried giving so-and-so an I Statement?" That usually does it.
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I statements
Old 08-14-2006, 06:11 AM
 
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mjh, I use the I statement, too. It is surprising how quickly that becomes a habit. At conference time, parents even comment on how his child uses that at home. A little transference doesn't hurt!
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Last Year
Old 08-14-2006, 03:35 PM
 
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The tattle-reports sound neat.
My group of kids from last year kept me on my toes towards the END of the year. It wasn't so much the initial part of the year. Like most people might under certain circumstances, they seemed to get sick of each other and want to whine all the time! Wonder how that happens?
I said "You can give me a REPORT of danger, a threat, theft, or blood." but "You can not tattle all the time. "

Then if one of the regular tattlers was headed my way I would hold up the sign of a T with my fingers and look at her in a questioning manner - which meant "Are you about to tattle?" or "Is it a REPORT?"
This thwarted most of that young lady's efforts at melodrama.
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