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Strongerteac
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snippy snappy coworkers
Old 10-24-2010, 04:14 PM
 
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Hi,

Just wondering how you all handle snippy coworkers/staff etc.

I have always tried to never snap at others because I don't like being snapped at myself.
I thought it was disrespectful, etc. However I was generally a people pleaser like many elementary teachers seem to be.

However, over the years it became obvious that many others did not live by the "do unto others..." approach.

So, I decided that I would not be a pushover, and that if push come to shove - I would speak up, speak back, etc. Well, this year while I have not raised my voice to anyone, but when I was given a weak excuse for why I couldn't do something, I did question it. I swear, I've had staff lie to cover up their mistakes, etc.

Well apparently, some of those snippy people who can dish it out, but they cannot take it.
Have made comments to my P.

So now, it has gotten back to me that I have been pushy, and not wanting to follow the rules, and in a bad mood, etc.

This is so funny to me, since apparently, in the past I was just a doormat for people to snap at whenever they were having a bad day. Now that I say something back - they decide to whine about me to the P. WT?!!!

I tell you, I never go to the prince to whine about other teachers. I just had to vent about this.


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I used to be that way
Old 10-24-2010, 05:52 PM
 
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when I was younger I was a real pushover. I have toughened up with a few years of experience. I am a pleasant person overall but I don't think people think I am an easy target any longer. That being said I still run into a team member once in a while who may be immature and think she can run to the principal to tattle about something she actually knows little about. I just consider the source. The P.E. teacher at our school is such a person.
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Been There
Old 10-24-2010, 06:28 PM
 
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I just consider the source, remember who is in who's pocket, and smile. Learn to play their game, and beat them at it. Stupid, pointless, immature, but one of those things you just have to do when you work with a building full of women.
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Old 10-24-2010, 07:13 PM
 
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I could have written your post.

I'm so tired of the principal asking me if anything is wrong. I'm fine. I'm just speaking my mind, and in a very polite manner. But I'm not letting people say ugly or mean things.

I do use the smile technique a lot. Even if I'm disagreeing with someone, I smile, smile, smile as I say it.

But that doesn't help when certain teachers run down to our principal and complain about others. And he bites. He comes running to whoever it was and stirs the pot even more. Such a micro-manager. And the other one needs to grow up. Neither one acts very professional, nor very kind.

Whatever. I'm too old to let you cut me down, too tired of backstabbing comments to listen to it, and if that's interpreted as being grouchy, then so be it. I said it nicely, but I said it.
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Old 10-24-2010, 08:40 PM
 
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I relate the being "too old to let you cut me down" thing. I used to be a people pleaser and somewhere along the way realized I had to start standing up for myself.

I think getting older has made me more empowered to speak my mind. If I disagree with something, or someone is trying to push me around, I'm going to speak my mind and stand firm.

I like it and have more respect for myself now as well.


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Until you say no or make a demand
Old 10-25-2010, 07:22 AM
 
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My grandma told me everyone will love you until you say no or make a demand. Of course they are whining, you are not giving them their way and they couldn't whine to you so they went to the P. I get tired of this behavior myself and hope you get some good ideas. Hang in there.
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Hard to be nice
Old 10-25-2010, 01:40 PM
 
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I let a colleague walk over me sometimes even though it drives me crazy. She is a nut but a good person at heart. Every once in a while she needs to be put in her place when she gets snippy so I just say, "Is everything ok? You seem a little distracted and upset today". That turns her right around. But that doesn't work with everyone. You have to know what buttons to push. As for the drama with the P, let your reputation speak for you. If you are professional, do your job to your best ability and don't cause waves then that should count in your favor. If it doesn't then don't back down.
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Old 10-25-2010, 02:05 PM
 
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are you sure you don't work with me???? Yes, we all have our off days but for one, the co-worker seems to have it "ALL THE TIME" if it's not this it's that ad naseum......Can I get off the ride now???!!!!

Like today, we were short bodies and had to make do...welll, the co-worker comes in all flustered and yaps and complains about how unfair it is for him/her to help out with getting food to the classrooms ( I work in a pre-school)....hey, we've all at one time or another been in this position (me more than once)

IT's called S-A-C-R-I-F-I-C-E-sheezzz
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do the right thing
Old 10-26-2010, 03:14 AM
 
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I am an "older teacher" and have learned:

- you never know who is feeding the administration info and gossip. Assume it is everyone but you

- never be the administrations's source. You may feel powerful, but you will evolve into a nasty, mean thing

- to smile and say hello to everyone, even the bitter ones who don't deserve it and maybe even ignore you. You can't steal MY joy!

- to confide in people only after they have lived the test of time with you

- evil just grows, so don't hang out or befriend evil people. Yes, there ARE evil teachers.

- to have an active life outside of school. Living school stress and drama 24/7 leads to anxiety disorders and meds in your future.

- don't allow yourself to get worked up about things. I comply unless the request is immoral or damaging to myself or my students.
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Love it...
Old 10-26-2010, 04:48 AM
 
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Great response connieg!! Amen!
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Thanks
Old 10-26-2010, 04:18 PM
 
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Thanks so much! You have really made me feel better. The game in our building is really whoever tells the prince first - the prince believes.

Well I NEVER tell on anyone. I do know of one instance when a little jabberjaw, after whining about me not leaving enough work for her when she subbed for me (she READ the handouts to the class and TOLD them the answers - took all of 5 minutes). So of course, Prince ambushed me and said, "I understand you aren't leaving enough work for your sub....blah blah blah"

Well guess what? That same old jabberjaw later complained to our central office about the PRINCE! Then he hauled her but in the office and told her off for going over his head. KARMA baby is nice.
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