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Trying to decide about getting another dog
Old 11-10-2017, 04:12 PM
  #1

My beloved Ricochet passed three weeks ago tomorrow. We had him from when he was a mischievous devil of a 4 month old puppy until the old man of 12 1/2 that it broke my heart to smithereens to say goodbye to. I loved having a dog, and as a single mom, and then as a woman living alone (once DS was away at college), I loved having a big dog as protection, as well as company.

I always said I would get another dog soon after my Ricky passed (I would probably have gotten another while he was here, but he was food aggressive and wouldn't tolerate another dog in the house). I have already been looking and there are three dogs that have caught my eye. First there was Popeye, an adorable puppy with one eye. He is fine, otherwise, though. But he is small (not even 20 lbs.) and a puppy, and I like a big dog, and also, I am not home enough right now to train a puppy. But while on his rescue site, I am following the story of Seagram, who was taken from a bad situation (left outside every day 365 days a year). They are not sure how old he is, between 6-8, and a foxhound mix, about 60 lbs. I spoke with the woman from the rescue who is fostering him and she said he is real love, and fine from his ordeal, other than being too skinny. I do like the idea of taking in a dog that others might not snap up (one with a disability of some sort, or an older guy like Seagram). There is also a 1-2 year old part Mastiff at my town humane society (he'd been abandoned in a remote location ). Anyway, I am leaning towards Seagram right now. I feel like it would be nice to give him a good, safe, warm home, after being neglected with his prior owner.

BUT - as much as I love having a dog, and as empty as the house feels without one, I am also freer now than I have been for SO LONG! As a single mom to my son, and then also caring for Ricky for 12 years, I was always responsible for someone or something else. Right now, I am not. It's weird, but freeing. I was out today and did not need to rush home to let the dog out, and if I stay at work late (where I get more done than I do at home), I am not fretting that the dog is waiting for me. I can stay at my boyfriend's and then leave his place to go to work. (before I would bring Ricky with me but always had to bring him home before going somewhere else).

Anyway, I am just trying to decide. I do love dogs, I did love having one, and I appreciate the company and protection of one. I will definitely get another dog. And I feel badly that there are dogs out there in need of a good home, and I COULD give it to one of them. On the other hand, maybe a little freedom for a while is not a bad thing. And unfortunately, there will always be a deserving dog in need of a loving home...

What to do...


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Old 11-10-2017, 04:16 PM
  #2

I would wait. You're still grieving. You should grieve. Enjoy your freedom for a bit. I'd rethink in the spring and think about a new dog for the summer when you have time to train and bond. Hugs to you
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Old 11-10-2017, 04:20 PM
  #3

I would suggest giving it a little more time, too.

I love having my dog, but I honestly would love to be a little more unencumbered, too.
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Old 11-10-2017, 04:20 PM
  #4

Follow your heart. It will tell you when it's time. It is a big decision.

One consideration with an older animal is that you likely won't have as many years with it. Some people can handle that more easily than others.
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Old 11-10-2017, 04:21 PM
  #5

I also agree with waiting.

Your other option is to foster for a local rescue group. That way you could have a dog in the house, but you wouldnít be tied down. Itís kind of tr best of both worlds. Fostering isnít for everyone though. You need to be able to let the dog go when he/she gets adopted. Personally, I love knowing the dog is going to a wonderful forever home, but not everyone finds it easy saying good-bye.


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dog
Old 11-10-2017, 04:28 PM
  #6

I can't blame you for wanting another dog, and I also think a grieving and free period is good. Dogs are so much fun and so loving. I am wondering if a puppy during the school year is an good idea. Also, what do they think the abandoned or abused dogs would do with you leaving for work prior to a bonding period like the summer? Something to think about. I do hope you get the right fit.
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Old 11-10-2017, 04:47 PM
  #7

I love dogs too as much or more than the next person. It's hard to believe, but my dog's been gone for...it will be 5 yrs this Feb. I would have definitely gotten another dog probably after 1-2 yrs if I lived in a home and not still an apt like I do and I'll get a dog again for sure.

If your dog's only been gone for 3 wks and you have this freedom, I say wait as well...maybe at least a year. Don't be in a rush because you want to rescue a dog and give it a good life. For that matter, there are millions of homeless dogs out there and we can't save them all as much as we'd like to.

Three weeks is no time to really breathe still. The main thing is to make sure YOU'RE ready and have the time. With a teacher's schedule, the very start of the summer as you know is the ideal time to get a pet so you both get accustomed to things, form your routines, and spend time bonding before it's back to work again.
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Old 11-10-2017, 06:27 PM
  #8

When the right dog comes along, you will know that it is the right time.
Best of luck to you!!
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Old 11-10-2017, 07:35 PM
  #9

I know you love dogs. I do too. But let me suggest a cat. I got one from a local rescue 2 weeks ago. I let her choose me, not the other day around. Cats are so much more independent. No rushing home to let them out.

The cat that adopted me is very loving. She plays fetch like a dog. Yes. Really. She's filled that pet void that I had since my last cat died a couple of years ago.

Just a thought.
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There are many Great Dogs
Old 11-10-2017, 08:11 PM
  #10

You can find one any time. I would wait a little longer to see if this freedom thing grows on you.


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Old 11-10-2017, 09:42 PM
  #11

I agree with giving yourself a little more time to grieve and enjoying some freedom for awhile. I think you will know when you are ready - maybe a good time would be an extended school break like Christmas or spring, or sometime during summer break.

Nancy
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If you are ready
Old 11-11-2017, 05:16 AM
  #12

I'd say go for Seagram. Older dogs are often ignored for younger ones. As you know, I lost my Hogan a year and a half ago. I lost my cat, Ike, a week ago. Trixie, my almost 10 year old Yorkie, is driving me nuts. She's picked up a nervous habit of scratching herself and chewing on herself. Her skin is not dry and she does not have fleas. So, I am toying with adopting another small dog, but a senior dog like her. I've seen a few on the website where I adopted Hogan. I'd have to travel to get the dog, as they are up and down the east coast. I'll know the right time and the right dog.
Kathy
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Old 11-13-2017, 05:51 PM
  #13

Thanks for the feedback. Right now, I am trying to just take a little time (though I keep checking back to see what Seagram's status is). I know that I am at a stage in my life where I am out and about a lot more than I used to be; I am trying to just try on that freedom for a bit. I just feel so dang guilty about the sweet dogs out there who need a home (like Seagram). This Saturday night, I went to my boyfriend's and stayed over; we spent the entire day in the city on Sunday and I stayed last night again, leaving to go to work this morning. I wouldn't have been able to do that, if I had a dog (I would've had to bring it back home before going to work, a 45 minute trip in the other direction). So for now, I am trying to just see how I like being unencumbered. But I know it is only a matter of time before I adopt a new friend.

Thanks for all the advice
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