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Husband died
Old 03-21-2008, 06:47 PM
 
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My husband (age 49) suffered a severe stroke a week ago Thursday (3-13). He died Tuesday morning. This next week is our Spring Break. My three kids and I have family here, the service will be 3-27, and then everyone is heading home. Iím not sure how I will feel about returning to school come Monday 3-31. Has anyone out there had a similar experience? How have you handled this? Iím afraid of getting back into school and falling apart. Thanks in advance for your feedback. Iím feeling very lost right now and unsure as to how to handle a lot of things.


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bless your heart
Old 03-21-2008, 06:50 PM
 
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I am so sorry. I haven't been through loosing a spouse so I can't pretend to know how you feel. I just wanted to tell you that I'll be thinking of you and praying for you. People on this site are so wonderful about offering support in times like these. May God bless!
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Old 03-21-2008, 06:54 PM
 
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I am so sorry!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't imagine what you must be going through. I have never been through losing a spouse, so I have no advice for you. Just know we will all be thinking about you and your children, and praying for you.
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Old 03-21-2008, 06:55 PM
 
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We have had two teachers lose a spouse, and one who lost a child. None of them took a long time off, and they just did the best they could when they returned . . . and nobody cared if they had to "fall apart" every now and then along the way.

Sorry about your loss!
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So Very Sorry
Old 03-21-2008, 06:59 PM
 
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My heart goes out to you! Do not worry about going back to school. In our system we get 3 Bereavement Days, but this is your husband! You will have so much to deal with, never mind emotionally! I know of one case in our school where a teacher lost her husband suddenly and she was out for a couple of months. I am sure that there can be a way you can take much needed time. I don't know whether she used sick time or what. Is your principal approachable? Or get in touch with your union rep. I think you will need a little more time.


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So Sorry!
Old 03-21-2008, 07:00 PM
 
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I know this is a difficult time for you. I, too, lost my husband. He died of cancer so I knew the end was near. It happened my first year of teaching so I really didn't have any choice but to return since I had used all my personal and sick leave. My son died a few years ago and when I thought I was ready to go back, I really wasn't. It became the hardest thing to do--to return to work because of the awkwardness of colleages and not knowing what to say, etc. However, the kids helped so much because of the routines, keeping my mind on teaching, etc.

Only you know when you feel like returning. Give yourself time to grieve. When my son died (in January) and I returned to work I delayed a lot of the grieving until that summer. Then it hit me because I had time to face it.

Again, my thoughts and prayers will be with you.
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Condolences...
Old 03-21-2008, 07:24 PM
 
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Karin,
Thank you for taking the time to share your loss with us...I can honestly say that I do care about what you are experiencing right now. My prayer for you is that the love you and your husband shared will be your strength at this time.

Personally, I have not had to deal with the same kind of grief and to face my colleagues and students soon after burying a loved one. I do know, though, of a colleague who returned to work soon after her husband died. I was very surprised to see her back so soon, but she felt that going back to work would help keep her mind off her grief.

The remainder of her year did not go well. She had a very rough class of 6th graders who had mostly had zero empathy, and their behavior seemed to worsen. I felt it was due to her emotions being weakened by the loss of her husband and not taking the time to work through her grief. She was let go at the end of the year by our principal, who also had zero empathy.

I know that we all deal with death of loved ones differently, and the support system we have surrounding us makes all the difference in how we face our present life and responsibilities. Of course, a person's faith in God's care and provision is a major part of the strength s/he can draw from.

I think that your feelings of being "very lost right now and unsure" and your "fear of falling apart" at school says a lot about your readiness to continue with your daily routine so soon after burying your husband.

I want to encourage you to take some more time for yourself....you have a lot to work through emotionally, and it's important for you to be a place of "safety" (your home) when feelings and memories begin to surface.

Know that we all care and are praying for you!

LindaR
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lots of prayers for you
Old 03-21-2008, 07:26 PM
 
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I am so very sorry for your loss! How tragic for you and your family. You are in my thoughts and prayers!!! I have no advice for you, but what pp's have said, makes so much sense. May God bless you and your family as you get through this very stressful time. I am so sorry.
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Sorry
Old 03-21-2008, 07:28 PM
 
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I am so sorry for your loss.
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Old 03-21-2008, 07:29 PM
 
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I am so sorry. A friend of mine went through the same thing a year ago. (He was 41.) I don't think it will be easy no matter when you go back. I think it has to be up to you when you think you can do it. It will be hard no matter what, but hopefully your friends, family and coworkers will be there for you when you need them. Again, I am so sorry.


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I am so sorry for your loss.
Old 03-21-2008, 07:31 PM
 
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I can not imagine what you are going through. A teacher I worked with a few years ago lost her husband too. She returned to work and did the best she could. I thought she did an amazing job all things considered. She thought it was best to get back to as normal of a routine as she could.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
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Old 03-21-2008, 08:15 PM
 
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I am so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children.
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Old 03-21-2008, 09:06 PM
 
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For me, it was important to keep the boys' lives as normal as possible. I wanted them to know that it was still okay to laugh and play and be with friends. So I had them return to school after our Spring Break (my DH died on MOnday of our break last year). I needed some alone time to process things and ther were many, many unexpected errands to deal with to take care of insurance, banking, ect. So I stayed out another week after that. I was worried about breaking down at school mostly because everyone is so kind. I talked to a friend at work and she passed the word that nobody was allowed to be nice to me. Getting back to work meant having to focus on something else for ten hours a day. Busyness is my friend! I am so sorry for your loss and I'll pray for your family.
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prayer
Old 03-21-2008, 09:10 PM
 
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I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.
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Old 03-21-2008, 09:21 PM
 
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I have prayed for you and your family. I have never been through anything like this, but I am sure others on here have and can offer some wisdom. My thoughts are with you.
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Old 03-21-2008, 09:33 PM
 
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My heart goes out to you and your kids.

Trust your instincts --- you and your kids are the priority. If you need more time your job will wait. There will be some emotional times whether you are at home or at school. Do what is best for you and your kids.

You have so much to think about right now --- is there anyone who can do the basic legwork or research for you as to how to take a bit of a leave of absence? Perhaps if someone else, like your union rep could get information for you. If you don't have a union, then one of your teacher friends. Just because you have the information doesn't mean you have to take some time, but it might make it easier to make a decision. At this point it must be hard to even know what questions to ask.

Thoughts and prayers are with you.
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The same thing happened to me
Old 03-22-2008, 01:07 AM
 
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My huband was 42(my Husband died as a result of a work accident)and my chldren were 3 and 6. For their sake I chose to take the minimum time as they needed to have some sort of normalcy to their lives but as other posters have said being at work fills in lots of hours thinking time.You do function for a long time on auto pilot and as long as you set small goals sometimes hour by hour and are not too hard on your self you will get through this.My Thoughts are with you
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I am so sorry-
Old 03-22-2008, 03:11 AM
 
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There's nothing I can add to help other than I'll be thinking of you over the weeks and months to come.
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So, so sorry
Old 03-22-2008, 03:50 AM
 
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I would think it would be very difficult to go right back. That being said, I have heard many people say that doing so helped them get through it because they were back into their routine and they were busy so it took their mind off things. You will need to see how you are feeling and what the needs of you and your children are.


My thoughts are with you during this most difficult time!

(((HUGS)))
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My thoughts and prayers
Old 03-22-2008, 04:08 AM
 
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go out to you! I can't imagine a loss like that! I know from my experience when my dad passed away, my mom (also a teacher), went back to work sooner than I thought she should. But she said it helped to be around people, especially kids. They cheered her up. It for sure didn't take the hurt away but it helped take her mind away from the loss for a bit.
God Bless!
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time to grieve
Old 03-22-2008, 05:00 AM
 
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Karin-
I am so sorry. I think you might need some more time to grieve. With everyone around and having to stay focused on all the details and your kids, you won't have time to really take care of yourself. Do you have to go back to school on Monday? No, let me answer that for you...NO. The classroom and the Universe will be ok, if you take some alone time to heal. Please try your best to do that! DO not feel guilty. I can not imagine what you are going through. You are so strong. It is ok for you to feel sorry for yourself and need some time alone to cry or think or just come to peace with everything. All the best wishes for you and your family. I am so sorry for your incredible loss. Also, is there anyone who has been through this in your community? I would think connecting with others for support would be helpful.
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My sympathies
Old 03-22-2008, 05:01 AM
 
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I am also very sorry for your loss. It's good for you to reach out to your support system, and PT can be a very loving place to start. I urge you to let others help you through this time. If you go back to work, and it's too hard, take the time you need. School might be a good distraction or it might be added stress. Only you will know what is right after you try it. Sending warm thoughts to you.
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Old 03-22-2008, 05:03 AM
 
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I, too, am very sorry for your loss. I think a lot of people on here have given good advice, but like a few said, you have to do what's best for you and your children right now. If you think getting back to work and a routine quickly is the best, then do it. If not, I hope that your admin is able to help you out as far as taking more time off. Whatever you choose, please know that our prayers are with you and your family.
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I'm so sorry...
Old 03-22-2008, 05:08 AM
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers go out to you during this very sad time.
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Old 03-22-2008, 05:23 AM
 
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You are in my prayers. PLease take care of yourself.
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Old 03-22-2008, 05:29 AM
 
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I lost my husband in April of 1993. He was 46. He was a Vietnam vet. It was hard because all my children were between the ages of 10 and 17. My husband did everything. I was working in another school at the time. I worked until the end of year. Then, I took a leave of absence just to get my bearings and to be with my kids. I learned how to drive. We would take off and travel; short distances at first and then longer distances. I did things with my kids that I wouldn't have a chance to do if I was working. And most improtantly, I prayed a lot for strength and guidance. It has been 15 years now. We all get together on holidays and talk about the fun times and the mishaps we had after my husband's death and we talk about my husband. God bless you in everything and in all ways.
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so sorry Karin
Old 03-22-2008, 05:31 AM
 
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Karin, I wanted to add that I'll also be praying for you and your family. This is a tough thing to go through, but you will get through it.

A few years ago my little sister died in her early 40s. On Friday I knew she was in the hospital and it was bad. On Saturday I was told she died. On Sunday I wanted to go to Sunday School and church, because I would get comfort there, but didn't know I couldn't hold it together past the first concerned question of how I was. I had plenty of hugs. On Monday I went to school for a few minutes to arrange lesson plans for a sub for a whole week. I showed the office staff a very recent picture of my sister and the comments and concern I felt from everybody helped.

The following Monday, when I returned to work, I had offers from several people that if I needed someone to cover my room while I go compose myself, just to call. Two administrators were among the people who offered. My advice is, whenever you decide to go back, find people who would be willing to do this for you, and take advantage of it if you need it.

As I'm typing this, I'm tearing up over the loss of my sister and imagining the loss of my husband. It takes a very long time to grieve. Do what you need to do, and a week from now it will be clear whether you can go back to work the next Monday.
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loss
Old 03-22-2008, 05:56 AM
 
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I'm sorry and will pray for you and your family. I can't imagine how it would be possible to concentrate at school with so much going on in your life.

If you need more time, take it.
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In prayers
Old 03-22-2008, 06:19 AM
 
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You and your kids will be in my thoughts and prayers. I would say do what feels right for you. Take care of yourself and allow yourself time to grieve.
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i am so sorry for you!
Old 03-22-2008, 06:23 AM
 
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take as much time as you feel you need. (however, sometimes staying busy can help you work through problems.)

hang in there--sending positive vibes.
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Old 03-22-2008, 06:23 AM
 
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I am sorry for your loss. I have no advice, but am sending prayers up for you and your little ones. Please take all the time you need. May God be with you all during this difficult time.
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So sorry
Old 03-22-2008, 06:55 AM
 
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My thoughts and prayers are with you. You need to take things at yoour own speed. Do what you think is best, and what will work for you. Every person is different. Don't worry about other people's judgements, they have no clue what your life or your grieving process should be, only you know that. I'm rooting for you.
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So sorry for your loss!
Old 03-22-2008, 07:08 AM
 
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I can't imagine going through what you are going through. I think that everyone has to handle their grief their own way. I think I would have to go back to work to maintain some kind of routine and to keep my mind occupied. I know others who would need to take time off and prepare themselves for going back. Would it be possible to go back 1/2 days for a week or so? I don't know if that would help or not. I will also be in prayer for you and your children. God gives perfect peace and strength.
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condolences
Old 03-22-2008, 07:09 AM
 
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I agree that you have to do what you feel like you're ready for. Everyone grieves in their own way and at their own pace. Some people like to stay busy and get back into their routine, while others need to spend some quiet time alone for a while.

I wish I could give you some good advice, but I haven't been in your situation before. I know some teachers that I work with have handled it differently - some came back right away and others took time off. Either way I think it's a good idea to prep your students (let someone else do it) so they don't overwhelm you when you return.

My prayers go out to you and your family.
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My heart breaks
Old 03-22-2008, 07:55 AM
 
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for you and all the posters who have had such pain and sadness. I never would have guessed there would be so many posters who experienced times like what you are going through now. God bless all of you.
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You and your family
Old 03-22-2008, 08:03 AM
 
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are in my prayers. Remember the greatest thing in life is family, because they will always be there. Take care and God Bless!
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hugs and prayers for you
Old 03-22-2008, 08:05 AM
 
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I am so sorry about your loss. My first instinct is to say that getting back into a normal routine on the 31st, and around people at school who care about you, could be a very good thing. However, you will know best how you feel at that time. Take time if you need it, but also keep yourself connected to people who care. If too many people come to visit or call, politely let them know you need some rest time. In January, one of our teachers lost his wife. He returned to school a week later and I remember him commenting about all the people from school who just came over to sit with him and,while he appreciated it, it also was a little draining to him. Take care.
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So sorry Karin
Old 03-22-2008, 08:27 AM
 
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I just wanted to let you know that another PT member has you in her thoughts in prayers. Trust your instincts and do what is right for you and your children. Take the time you need. When you do return just know that you probably will break down, it's the human thing to do, but it's okay. Accept the support and assistance from your colleagues. Just remember your PT friends are also here for you.
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Old 03-22-2008, 08:34 AM
 
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So sorry to hear about your husband. No advice, but sending thoughts and prayers your way...
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Old 03-22-2008, 09:33 AM
 
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Karin,
You're in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry for your loss! I would say that your school would probably be more than willing to work with you on when you return to school. Do what you need to do to get through this.
Have a peaceful Easter!
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Also wanting to extend my sympathy
Old 03-22-2008, 01:41 PM
 
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Karin,
I'm so sorry for your loss, I know this must be a very trying and confusing time for all of you. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Old 03-22-2008, 01:51 PM
 
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss!! You are in my thoughts and prayers as you and your children try to deal with this.

I have not been through this, but have supported too many who have been in your shoes. There are no magic answers to help you.

School will be there when you decide to return be it on the 31st or later. Everyone grieves in different ways and unfortunately there are lots of things you need to take care of----lawyer, getting bills in your name, SS, and the list goes on. You did not say how old your kids are? Are they still living at home? You probably need some time to yourself, but you also need help right now. When my stepdad died I spent 2 weeks with my mom and helped her do so much of the nonsense that needed to get done. She sat and was available to answers questions, but I was the driving force behind the work we did. I pretended to be her on many of the calls I made and got really saved her a lot of agony making those phone calls. Is there someone who can stay with you and help you get those things taken care of?

One word of advice--my mom planned to sell SD car quickly, but we thought we needed to get insurance changed to her name right away. OOPS! That was a mistake. Her rates went up for the few weeks that she did that before selling the car. Reasoning was she was now one person with two vehicles. So, don't call insurance company right away! Save it for last!

(((((((HUGS))))) are coming your way! Prayers will be with you and please let us know if we can help at all!
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Old 03-22-2008, 02:00 PM
 
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Karin,

I have no experience with your situation, therefore, no comment on what you should do. I just wanted to let you know that I will be praying for you and your family. I am very sorry that you are having to go through such a tragic event.
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Thoughts and prayers go out to you...
Old 03-22-2008, 02:09 PM
 
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I would definitely utilize my family leave days, if your district has them, and we have bereavement personal days, too. If you feel you need more time, I would approach my principal and/or superintendent and ask for more time. My district is very good about working with people in situations like this, I hope yours is, too. If you don't feel ready (and who can be after a shock like that), give yourself the time you need. I would also lean on my family and friends as much as I could, and let them comfort you. That's what they're there for. Hugs to you.
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Sorry for your loss.
Old 03-22-2008, 02:39 PM
 
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I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Take your time going back to work if that is what you think you need. You might find getting back to work will help you. I'm sure your faculty will be very supportive and help you through this difficult time.

I will keep you in my prayers.
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So sorry
Old 03-22-2008, 05:06 PM
 
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Karin,

I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Take whatever time you need before going back into the classroom. It is important that you grieve however you need too.

I will pray that all those around you continue to offer you the support that you need now and in the coming weeks.
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So sorry
Old 03-22-2008, 05:23 PM
 
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Karin
Old 03-22-2008, 05:26 PM
 
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I think this is the saddest post that I have ever read on pt. My heart is breaking for you, your children, along with all the others who have posted about loved ones that they have lost. Grieving takes a long time. Just when you think you are over that hill another blast of sadness will hit you. You have alot of adjustments that you will have to endure. With children your grieving will take a back burner. Maybe you can take a few extra weeks off and grieve when the children are in school. Thoughts, prayers, and hugs are headed your way. Please keep us posted on how you are doing.
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Thinking of you
Old 03-22-2008, 05:40 PM
 
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I am terribly sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your children. God Bless.
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I'm sorry for your loss
Old 03-22-2008, 05:50 PM
 
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I cannot imagine what that must feel like. Last year, during my internship, my directing teacher's husband suffered a series of heart attacks and passed away. She was out for a week and a half. She told us she wanted and needed to come back. Like a PP said, only you know when it will be time to come back.
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In my thoughts and prayers
Old 03-22-2008, 06:04 PM
 
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You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. You need to do whatever is best for you and your children. I agree with the others that you need some back-up when you return in case you need to take a break. One of my co-workers lost her husband suddenly as a result of an accident, and after a week came back for half a day, and then after another week or two came back full time. We were instructed to treat her as if nothing happened because she didn't want to fall apart. That worked for her. When you're ready for the distraction of the children and the support of your work friends, that's when you go back. Just be sure to allow yourself time to grieve, because there's no way around it. You can do it- hang in there, and take it one day, or one hour, or one minute at a time. God Bless you and your families.

Janet
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Old 03-22-2008, 06:38 PM
 
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I will pray for you and your family. I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I've been married all of my adult life and my husband is now 41 years old. I can't imagine losing him now. May God bless you.
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so sorry
Old 03-22-2008, 06:47 PM
 
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I am so sorry for your loss. This will be a very difficult time for you. Just do what you can. Go back when you feel good and ready. Again, my thoughts and prayers are with you.
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Thoughts
Old 03-22-2008, 07:03 PM
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss. The past 5 years I have lost my father-in-law, my father (toughest loss I've ever had to deal with) and recently my mother (somewhat expected but never the less difficult). My husband was given 8 to 15 years after his cancer surgery about 11 years ago and he reminds me that he won't be around long. I tend to poo poo that and tell him he will be around longer than he thinks. All I know is that your students will give you strength and courage. It is ok to cry and laugh and feel lost.

My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your kids.
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I, too, will add you
Old 03-22-2008, 07:36 PM
 
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to my prayer list. God bless you for the turmoil you must be feeling right now. A teacher in my district lost her husband suddenly due to a car accident. She took several weeks off. I think you are the only one that will know when you'll feel like going back. Don't be afraid of falling apart- who wouldn't understand?! Maybe going back gradually - like half days, would help ease you into it?? Take care Karin.
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God bless you.
Old 03-22-2008, 07:52 PM
 
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There are really no words to say other than I am so very sorry for the loss that has come into your lives. Some how you will know what to do and you will walk through this in the way that's best for you and you children. When my parents died I only took a week off. I don't know if that is good or not. I had a few break downs in private but went through the days as best as I could. Listen to your heart and you'll know what to do. Ask for help when when the grief washes over you. God will place people in you life to help you through this. God bless you and your children,. You are not alone.
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I am so sorry
Old 03-23-2008, 06:36 AM
 
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I will keep you in my prayers.

{{{{hugs}}}}
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So sorry!
Old 03-23-2008, 07:14 AM
 
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Karin,
I am so sorry! At this point I can only agree with what so many have said: do what you need to do to take care of yourself and your children. I can't even begin to imagine your pain and uncertainty, but know that you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
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Old 03-23-2008, 09:00 AM
 
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Karin, I just wanted you to know that one more person is thinking about you. You will be in my prayers. I would also like to say again that it's okay to fall apart at school. When you do go back if you find it hard being there I think everyone would understand your need to cry or even go home. People are definitely more understanding than we think. Bless you.
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Old 03-23-2008, 09:07 AM
 
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I am also thinking of you. Take it one day at a time and do what feels right to you.
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My thoughts are with you, too!
Old 03-23-2008, 12:07 PM
 
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I can't imagine such a devastating loss. I think you have to be the one to decide what's right for you and your family. Each person handles grief in her own way. I remember one student who insisted he had to come to school the day after his dad died in an automobile accident and his grief-stricken mom let him. For him, routine seemed to help. (Actually I was the one who came closer to "losing it" that day just seeing him clouded in grief.) One of my third graders remarked that "Jesse was handling it pretty well" and I was able to help them understand that people dealt with grief differently. I think when the time comes, you will know what is right for you.

When my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer shortly before school started many years ago I took a leave of absence for a year to go up to care for him and support my family. I will never regret that decision
It was enormously healing to be there and see him through the process.

My mom had a severe stroke the day before school started this year and I have balanced teaching and going down (1 hour away) each weekend to support her. (Different school, different situation.) It's been a tough year for me, but taking the year off wasn't an option in this school and didn't fit the circumstance.

Do what feels right for you. In the meantime feel "hugged" by your friends here at Pro Teacher. One of the best bits of advice I learned from my grieving class was to "cry when you need to and laugh when you can." I found friends who were just willing to listen one of my greatest human comforts.
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with sympathy
Old 03-23-2008, 02:29 PM
 
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Karin,
I'm praying that you have the emotional and physical strength you need to get through this time. (((((Hugs))))) to you and your kids.
Take care,
De'Anna
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Old 03-23-2008, 02:33 PM
 
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I am praying for you and your family. Take care and keep us posted on how you are doing. You know your PT friends are always here to listen and comfort.
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My sincerest sympathy
Old 03-23-2008, 06:17 PM
 
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I am praying that you will have a supportive staff, class and parents that will help you through each day. Don't be afraid to ask for help, I'm sure many would be happy to help you in may way, if they just knew how. Lean on them right now, you will have time and energy to pay it forward someday.
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Old 03-23-2008, 07:15 PM
 
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Karin,
My heart and prays go out to your family. I can't imagine what you are going through right now, but I can send many, many ((((HUGS)))) your way. May God keep you and your family through this hard time.
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Old 03-24-2008, 06:11 AM
 
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I too am very sorry for your loss. I will not pretend to understand, but I will be thinking and praying for you and your family.
I don't know if there is an appropriate time to return. You have to be the judge of it and everyone around you will understand.
It is not easy and no one will expect you to not break down from time to time.
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thoughts
Old 03-24-2008, 09:08 AM
 
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I am so unbelievably sorry to hear this. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts.
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Dear Karin,
Old 03-24-2008, 11:50 AM
 
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You and yours are in my thoughts and in my prayers. May you be comforted by good memories.... Grief is a very personal thing; you must follow your heart.
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So Sorry
Old 03-24-2008, 12:30 PM
 
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I would take all the time you need. Does your school have a policy? We had a teacher loose a parent and took two weeks.

Thoughts and prayers are with you!
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Old 03-24-2008, 12:40 PM
 
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Karin,

I don't have anything to add. I just wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I can't imagine what you are going through right now. Like others have said, we are here for you!
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Old 03-24-2008, 01:44 PM
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your children are in my prayers.
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Karin...
Old 03-24-2008, 02:12 PM
 
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I cannot add anything to what's already been said. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family in this time of sadness and struggle.
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My sympathy
Old 03-24-2008, 02:16 PM
 
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Sorry for your loss.
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so sorry
Old 03-24-2008, 03:30 PM
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss. Please take care & take the time that you need.
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You're in my prayers.
Old 03-25-2008, 10:08 AM
 
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I am so sorry for your loss. You should take as much time as you need before returning to your classroom. There is so much for you to think about and it is a very difficult time for you and your three kids. You are all in my thoughts and prayers. I pray that you will have strength to heal as soon as possible. Take care of yourself and your children.
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Don't know what else to say....
Old 03-25-2008, 12:09 PM
 
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Just felt I needed to send my support and let
you know that I am praying for you as I write.
I have know idea how you are feeling, but
I think that you will know what is best for you
and your kids. I don't know what your beliefs
are, but I believe that when I ask God to
open doors and show me the way, He always does.
Just a little side note;
When my mom passed away, I had a terrible time
after a couple of "numb" months. There was
a grief counseling session (about 6 weeks) offered
in my town. It helped a lot. I hope something
like that might be there for you and maybe your
kids.
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Old 03-25-2008, 06:06 PM
 
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I am so sorry for your loss! Prayers are being sent your way!
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Old 03-25-2008, 07:50 PM
 
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My husband sufferend a heart attack 2 years ago. I was fortunate in that he survived but I will probably guess that you are on auto pilot & arethinking about everyone else but yourself. I know that's what I did (I have 2 kids).
I am not sure if you have headed back to school or not but my suggestion is to get your kids back into their normal routine & you stay home. Allow yourself this time to grieve. If your children need to be with you then do so. If you can't do that, then maybe 1/2 day like someone else suggested.
Please keep us posted on how you are doing. As you can see, you have many people who are concerned about you here on PT.
All of my prayers are with you.
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Old 03-25-2008, 08:18 PM
 
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I am so sorry for you loss. (((((HUGS))))
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I feel so sorry
Old 03-26-2008, 08:54 AM
 
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Please take care and take the time you need.
You and your kids are in my prayers.
Hugs
mmar56
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Old 03-26-2008, 12:00 PM
 
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I am truly sorry for your loss. Please take as long as you need to grieve the loss of your husband. Also, please find a counselor, pastor, clergy...someone who you can talk to...to help with all the feelings that will surface.

Again, I am so sorry for your loss and I will be praying for you and your family in this difficult time.
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Thoughts and Prayers
Old 03-27-2008, 05:01 PM
 
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Sending thoughts and prayers your way. May you feel God's grace and peace now and always.
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I am so sorry
Old 03-28-2008, 03:12 PM
 
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Karin,
I am so sorry for your loss. Only you will know when the time to return to work is right for you. Losing a loved one is hard and everyone handles it differently. Although a different situation, I lost my sister in July of 06. She was 44 when she died suddenly. I was teaching summer school. For me it was easier to be at school and around the kids then to be home. Being busy was helpful. Be sure to take care of yourself and your family, the rest will be there when you are ready. Please keep us posted on how you are doing. Falling apart is to be expected and a natural part of grieving. Sometimes life is just not fair, sorry for your loss.
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My thoughts and prayers to you
Old 03-28-2008, 03:58 PM
 
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss..I cannot imagine how hard this must be for you. My family will be praying for you and your children. Take care of yourself, above all, and listen to your heart.
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So sorry
Old 03-28-2008, 06:01 PM
 
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I can't imagine what you and your family are going through. Take one day at a time and see how things go. Remember that many people don't know what to say or do to help so ask friends and family for help. They want to help you. Wish we could all be there to help.

Sending hugs and prayers. Call on us if you need us.
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Sorry
Old 03-28-2008, 07:31 PM
 
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I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.
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So sorry
Old 03-29-2008, 06:45 PM
 
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I just read this today. Please take whatever time you need, and don't worry about falling apart at school. Your colleagues will understand. But I've found that during hard times, the kids at school do completely help you take your mind off of things and cheer you up.
God Bless you and your family.
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