Ok last year I had the child whose mom was obsessed with his bladder control telling me not to let him use the bathroom during class. This year I have a mom that makes her child go to school no matter how sick she is and will not pick her up.
This past October her daughter threw up on her desk during class after lunch. We no longer have a school nurse to send the children to so we have to send them to the office. About 15 minutes later she comes back and sits in her seat. I call her out to the hall and asked her why she was not going home. She told me the office called her mom and she told them she would need to stay since there was only two hours left of school. I was completely shocked! I then asked her if she felt better and she said she still felt a little sick. I asked her when she started feeling bad and she said she woke up in the middle of the night throwing up and threw up in the morning before she left to go to school. I asked her if her mom knew, she said she did, but told her she still had to go to school. I kept the trash can by her desk the rest of the day. I told the principal what happened and he said he knew about it, but there was nothing he could do to make her come and get her. He then went on about how parents can’t always miss work to care for there sick kids like we can.
Now fast forward to this past Monday. This same little girl comes to school obviously not her normal self. As the day went on she couldn’t even keep her head up. I took her temperature and it was 101.3. I sent her to the office with a note. Well while we were having our after lunch restroom break her mom walked her over to the water fountain so she could take some Tylenol she brought her. She then kissed her goodbye and told her she would see her at 6:00 pm at her daycare. I stopped her and told her that she was feeling really bad during class and that I thought it was best that she went home. She said the Tylenol would kick in and she would start feeling better. Our principal just so happened to come out of the office so I told him that she had a 101 fever and is not supposed to be at school according to state law. He again sided with her and refused to make her take the child home. I was so mad my blood was boiling. My student had tears coming down her cheeks as her mom was leaving. Even worst about this the poor thing was going to have to go to daycare for 2.5 hours after school. I ended up letting her keep her head down the rest of the day. Of course she was back again on Tuesday still feeling sick.
I don’t know what to do since my boss will not back me up on this. Plus she’s better now anyway. I don’t want to go to the school board or call cps as I know this will just cause problems between us. I know it’s hard for some parents to take off, but it not fair to the child who can catch what they have or the other students. BTW she has never missed a day of school since kindergarten. Has anyone else had to deal with parents like this or sick kids comming to school? I have kids being sent to school sick all the time, but this has to be the worst.
Hmmm. That's a tough one. I doubt CPS would do anything, but I could be wrong. Since you mentioned this is against your state laws, I wonder if your union rep (if you have one) might be able to give you some ideas.
To answer your question, yes, I've had parents not pick up their sick kids. I feel so sorry for those kids. I just let them sleep on their desks. If I had one that was really sick for a longer period of time, I'd be tempted to make a "bed" for her with a comforter or a sleeping bag.
I also wonder, since she was vomiting, isn't she in danger of becoming dehydrated? And if she gets *really* ill, could you be liable? Again, I think you might want to talk to your union rep.
I feel so sorry for that child reading your post. Every once in a while I have a parent who won't or can't pick up a sick child, but never anything like your little girl. It makes me even sadder to think she had to endure daycare for 2 and a 1/2 hours after school. Poor thing! What have her previous teachers said about her parents? I don't know what you can do seeing how your boss won't back you up. Just wanted you to know I share your frustration. I hope she doesn't get sick again, for her sake.
My daughters' daycares will not keep a sick child under any circumstances. I think unless the daycare has special facilities this is true of most of them. (Those that do keep sick children in a "sickbay" will charge a substantial extra fee for that month.) They'll drop a child if a parent refuses to pick up a sick child. Since most GOOD daycares have waiting lists of about 2 years this becomes the parents' problem rather than the daycare's.
You might want to point out that keeping a sick child at school puts the school (and teacher) at great risk for liability. If the child goes into convulsions or aspirates vomit etc. it can become extremely problematic. You might also want to point out to the principal that besides the fact he is breaking the state law, he might have to get a sub if you get sick. $$$
While my heart goes out to parents with work-related issues, it is another instance of expecting the school to pick up child-rearing responsibilities. I think we do enough of that already.
Last edited by biyubelle; 04-21-2008 at 04:10 AM..
I feel so sorry for that little girl. She's already got to feel like the mother doesn't want to take care of her. If the little girl hears you saying stuff like, "She really needs to be at home." Then she's going to think you don't want her around either. And, if you call child services, and they go to the house and tell the mother to keep her home when she's sick, that little girl might be home alone while the mother still goes to work. Do you have a corner of the room where you can put a bean-bag, gatorade and a blanket and let the little girl take a nap? Let's just pray she doesn't do this to her little girl someday.
Amazing. I am a single parent, but I have never made my son stay at school while he is sick. Granted, I have people to help me out, but a sick child is a priority to me. I think there are probably rules that govern a sick child being allowed to remain at school. They could get the other children sick. I don't get this at all. And then the mom sends the child to after care?
I think you did the right thing, just trying to let the poor kid rest. Too bad there wasn't a nurse's room where she could be more comfortable.
I had a set of twins who came to school complaining that they were sick. The mom, who works at our school, brought them to school, even though she knew they were sick. She told them to go to school, and if she felt bad, I would send them to the nurse. So, all day, they wanted to go to the nurse. I sent them once, and put them off the rest of the day because the nurse talked to the mom, and she didn't want to leave work. She picked them up an hour before school was out so she could take them to the doctor. The next morning, they came in the room saying they had strep. I called the mom's classroom, and she said the doctor told her that they could come to school as long as they didn't have a fever. I told her that they had to be on antibiotics for at least 24 hours before they could come back when they had strep. I told her to call the nurse. The nurse backed me up, and the girls went home. It shouldn't take such a battle to get parents to keep their sick kids home.
Oh yes, I have had this problem. At the beginning of the year, when we ask for parent info. They give out numbers that do not exist. So when there child is sick or in trouble you can not get in touch with them. God forbid anything should happen. I fell sorry for the school system. For schools that do not have nurses on duty and they harbor sick children all day, it is a law suit waiting to happen.
04-20-2008, 09:27 PM
What have her previous teachers said about her parents? I don't know what you can do seeing how your boss won't back you up. Just wanted you to know I share your frustration. I hope she doesn't get sick again, for her sake. 
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